We're Gonna Move Out

Hey yah, guys! :)

Here I am again, writing this article wherein I will share something that had been happening to our family this past few days.

Extended family ....

Does it ring a bell? Oh, I know that all of us has the idea on what this words means. However, let me define it still.

"Extended family ....

is one of the type of family that extends beyond the nuclear family (parents and children only). Wherein the said nuclear family was living together with their grandparents, aunts, uncles, and other relatives. Whether they it be nearby or in only one household."

Paraphrased meaning from Oxford Dictionary.

There are many cases that nuclear families that are still living together with their in-laws, first family, relatives, or such even if they are already building or had built their own families. In Filipino, sama-samang namumuhay ang buong mag-anak or angkan sa isang lugar or sa isang bahay lamang.

Let me asked you, guys this question: "Are you also living with your extended families? With your grandparents, uncles and aunts, cousins under the same roof?"

If yes, "how's the experience, so far?" If it's great, then hope all na lang si self. If not, then let me say, "I feel yah."

I'm not an envious kind of person but like what mareng @ExpertWritter had said in her previous article, I will also admit that "I can't also stop myself to feel envious of those people who don't need to worry for their shelters because they already has their own house and lot." Because me and our family? We don't have that but that's one of our, my goals. However, it's not yet happening pa coz I am still on my way of having such a progress.

Maybe, I shared it here or in the comment sections of my co-content creators articles that we have the conflict with Mama's relatives (specifically, to her maiden aunts) about the land. Yeah, it's already a common reason why families or the clan were having such war due to wealth and properties. In short, nag-aagawan. In our case, we don't care if there will be no piece or part to be given to us because we don't plan to stay naman here all our life. We'll leave once we got the chance, when we became successful na.

Apparently, Mama's so-called relatives can't wait for us to leave this place. Causing for them to have fight (through words) and for Mama to cut ties with them. Well, we don't regret cutting ties with them naman to think that they're really toxic.

Mama is the second among the four children of our grandparents. Then, here's his younger brother (third child) that has a really bad habit and lifestyle. He's so alcoholic, fond of having debts, a gambler, warfreak (basagulero), and dependednt to his siblings, to Mama and Tita.

He has three children with her former live-in partner. Apparently, his children wasn't with him as he can't support them with their needs, especially financially. Now, all of his children was with their grandparents in the city proper. To sum it all up, he was just living with himself for years na.

If you were thinking that he's living so independently, no. You're totally wrong, because he is not. His foods? Oh, Tita had been providing for her. I mean, Tita's husband. Do we also provide for him? Yes but not totally. We'll just give her foods but he's not included in our budget. The electricity? He should be giving his shares for the bill but he don't want to.

Giving her foods and other needs was okay with us even though he shoudl be doing that all by himself coz he has the job naman ... however, it's not like that. His attitude had been making things go so bad. He's so alcoholic and all that a black sheep of a family can be defined of.

Last month of November, he became more alcoholic. He's often drunk and when he is drunk? He tends to be freak out, nagwawala. As in! He will throw words that should not be said on the first place. When he's drunk, he'll make kulit-kulit to Mama. Ah basta, usual na black sheep talaga. Sometimes, I've been asking myself if it was just an alcoholic drinks that he's been taking or may iba pa. You know, his actions are really different to the usual drunk man is.

This past few days (maybe, starting by last Sunday), he often got so wasted. And, as usual is magwawala na naman s'ya. Why? One of the many reasons is that because he has an enemy here in our compound, their eldest cousin who is also boastful and had a bad character. But, we are shocked that he started to argue with Mama and Tita this previous days. Maybe, he was being brainwashed by their so-called Aunts.

And, something more worst had happened last night. He shouted and angrily said this exact words, "Dahil sa inyo, kaya ganito ang buhay ko."

He was blaming Mama and Tita for the kind of life that he has. Full of debt, has a broken family, lots of problems, a miserable life. Mama and Tita had been doing a lot of favors for him to the point that he can't say anything na. But, why blame them when it should be himself to be only blamed for? He's already 36 years old yet he's still like that. He'll go to work by the morning and will go home, drunk and was often totally wasted. Until he said that he'll move in to their family house, for good and that Tita should move out.

Mama was so angry that night that made her to go to the Barangay Hall and asked for the tanod to come to our house to stop him. But, they hadn't did anything to stop him. Kaya wala din akong bilib sa barangay officials namin eh. Seriously, wala talaga.

So, our family together with Tita and her husband had made a decision. A very big decision which is to just ..... move out and leave him all alone here.

Actually, it's already our plan even before. It's not healthy in here na kasi but because we still can't afford it, we just make our patience more loooonger and deepen our understanding pa. But, we can't do it anymore. Nakaka-sagad na eh.

And this morning, we immediately looked for a boarding house here in our community. We can't go in a more far place coz Mama's clients in her paglalabada are all here. Good thing is that we had found one just within our street.

It's good for five people (Mama, Papa, me, and my two siblings). Tita had also found one which is just a few house away from us. The one that we had found has a monthly rent of PHP 1, 800.00 or 36 USD. Mama and Papa was asking me if we can pay for it ba and so me being an optimistic daughter, I said, "Yes, we can!"

I'm also asking myself if we can add another bill for us, monthly. But then I just want to be more optimistic and avoid thinking negatively. Mama had been asking me that question for too many times and to calm her down, I said that I'll just shoulder the rent. I know that it's not easy but I am also eager to live this place especially when I started with my thesis na. I wanna do it in a more peaceful environment and it's not here. Also, I am afraid that Mama will be sick because of him and that Papa's patience will be mapatid and I will not let that to happen. So, we really need to move out na talaga. As soon as possible!

As of this moment, Papa and bro was starting to do some cleaning in the boarding house. As we are aiming to settle everything before Christmas had arrived. In short, we'll celebrate our Christmas in our new house.

Next year, we'll have another beginning. In our case, it's a literal "new beginning" with our new house and changes of life. Maybe the reason is not good but what we'll get in return for leaving this place? It's beyond the word "great" and that's the peace of mind and more peaceful kind of living. ❤❣

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Published by December 18, 2021