Quarter Life Crisis. Can We Get Through It
Worry and fear of being left behind is common in the teenage to adulthood phase. Anxiety and anxiety about the future make a person often choose to be alone so that it makes him feel like he has no one but himself. Ages 17-33 years will experience many changes and transitions when building a stable life structure for adulthood.
The development of the times makes it easier for us to see the success of others who make us feel like we are alienated and feel like we have never had any achievements. Initially, we will enter the phase of not being confident in our abilities, which makes us need to rebuild our self-confidence. After we manage to build it we will feel trapped by the choices and decisions we make from education, career to relationships.
Regarding self-confidence, having self-confidence so that we can minimize the quarter life crisis that will certainly be faced in early adulthood, here are ways to increase self-confidence:
Stop being a perfectionist, understand and accept all the strengths and weaknesses that exist, and when there is a failure that makes you give up, learn and get back up.
Stop comparing with other people, making comparisons with others will make the heart tired, every human being has their own achievements, the key is to try to the maximum and the best.
Create a Self-Journal, writing achievements and failures in one place called Journalling, can help keep growing and help to be more grateful for what you already have.
So what is a quarter life crisis? The phenomenon that occurs at the age of 18-31 years is marked by a developmental crisis. At the beginning of the age of 20-30 years, humans will experience a phase, Intimacy vs. Isolation, a developmental stage where humans develop relationships with their support systems such as friends, parents, husbands and children.
How did this quarter life crisis happen? The following are the phases of the quarter life crisis, namely:
Locked phase, where we feel trapped in a relationship or job that is no longer satisfying or not in line with expectations
Separation phase, trying to separate yourself from the commitment physically and emotionally.
Quick phase, taking a moment, to realize that the truth is that things will always change and face painful things.
The search phase, trying and exploring the various options available, and taking new thoughts for the future.
The rebuilding phase, no longer feeling the crisis, rebuilding a new commitment, with a new goal.
But in fact there are so many things to think about, choosing a job, looking for a partner, lost direction, other people talk bad about us. But it is also about the well-being and pleasure of the soul. Be real and consistent, be the best of yourself. So how to find the future? What are we really fighting for? The main thing is? The value? Why are we in this world? The main thing is? The goal? What abilities do we have? Time is flowing, improve yourself.
Challenges and failures in life are okay, mistakes, failure barriers make us learn and realize, find the passion of your life, and don't have to compare yourself to social standards, focus on bigger things.
When we face a quarter life crisis, we will also be faced with a stage of sadness. The first stage is Shock Surprise or shock at the event, at this stage we will be surprised, shocked as confused as to what to do. The second stage is Denial, Disbelief, looking for evidence that isn't true, at this stage we refuse as if we don't believe that this is real and happening.
The third stage is Aware (Frustration) Recognition that things are different, sometimes angry, at this stage we begin to realize but sometimes we are angry about the situation. The fourth stage is Acceptance Low mood, lacking in energy, at this stage we have begun to be able to accept but our mood and energy are still very unstable.
The fifth stage is Experiment Initial engagement with a new situation, at this stage trying to get a new life out of the comfort zone. The sixth stage is Decision Learning how to work in the new situation, feeling more positive, at this stage you have started to learn and get up, start life again and begin to realize self-journals and have self-boundaries.
The last stage is Integration Changes integrated, a renewed individual, at this stage we have accepted everything and present ourselves as a newer self and more able to face the realities of life.
