Who Determines Your Wedding Day?

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Avatar for fiolyn_rea
1 year ago

Men and women were created to live together and complement each other. For someone who has already found the perfect match, they will want a more serious bond. This serious bond will certainly be wrapped in official letters and statements from each partner who is ready to get married. But, who determines your wedding day?

The answer will come back again between you and your partner. You and your partner can determine the special day together. But, there are factors that you can’t rule out. If you think about ignoring this, you will be considered a bad partner who doesn’t appreciate the beauty of marriage. Your marriage will be considered a stain by those who want a better standard than what you have planned. Thus, many perceive this as a problem.

Then, can you guess the factors that I mean? The answer is family, cultural and environmental factors that make you have to give space to those who want to change your marriage according to their standards. The criticism and suggestions given were not wrong. But in many cases, you often see that more of them are imposing than just giving advice & criticism normally.

From the family side, they often impose the standard that a good marriage is at a young age of fewer than 25 years. In terms of age, marriage under the age of 25 is considered to be less mature in terms of experience and work (although many have managed to organize their marriages well). But, this principle has failed more than it has succeeded in numbers. So, the couple should think about going a step further.

Besides the above, families also often impose marriage standards according to their requests regardless of the couple's financial condition. For example, they ask for many attributes of cultural costumes which are numerous. You know, that it's not worth the actual shorter event because you're only renting the venue for a few hours for the wedding. thus, it will be expensive and draining for both partners and families.

It often happens because families want to feel proud of their neighbors, friends and relatives so they hold events by imposing ideal conditions beyond financial problems that both partners can no longer bear. Preferably, this matter is consulted between you, your partner, your family and the wedding organizer. This is intended so that all plans go well and there are no uncontrollable costs, thus minimizing misunderstandings between parties who wish to hold a wedding.

Environmental and cultural factors also influence your marriage. From a direct perspective, your neighbors don’t have the right to your marriage. But, most Southeast Asian cultures are more concerned with relationships than the circumstances of the couple wanting to marry. For example, when your neighbor knows that you didn't invite him, the next day if you have a problem with him/her, you will get into big trouble even though this problem only started because you didn't invite your neighbor.

So, from the explanation above these things cannot be taken lightly, especially if your relationship with your family and neighbors is in bad condition. Marriage between you and your partner is indeed enjoyed together. But, the relationship with the closest people and the environment that binds you, will not just go away. They all stay present after you get married.

In the end, as a writer, I can only hope that any problems or difficulties related to them should be properly discussed. However, the people closest to you still have a positive contribution to your life and they aren’t always bad. As long as you communicate well and honestly, they will also show empathy for you and will understand that your condition takes precedence over their marriage standards.

Image Sources:
1. Pexels | Min An (lead image)
2. Pexels | Peace Alberto

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Avatar for fiolyn_rea
1 year ago


its indeed right, without proper rituals and traditions firstly your marriage will be criticize by society. But to be honest these rituals and norm which vary from nation to nation - from tribe to tribe is blessing. watching out different traditions make us to learn and entertain new cermonies.

$ 0.02
1 year ago

You're right, but this has become a constant problem because old traditions are hard to change.

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1 year ago