Some facts to be known before and after walking down the Aisle

TEXT: Gen: 2:18-25; Deuteronomy 29:29 AND 1Corithians 13:9

INTRODUCTION

Age, level and numbers of qualification, wisdom, and wealth are not the perquisite for marriage. God; the author of marriage is the only qualifier and determinant of a successful relationship, no matter how rough the road of the relationship.

Our main text :

Genesis 2:18-25

[18]And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.

[19]And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof.

[20]And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him.

[21]And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof;

[22]And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.

[23]And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.

[24]Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.

[25]And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.

From this main text we shall pick most of the facts as stated below. I will appreciate if this is not looked into and through the eyes homiletics.

Some of the facts we need to know before and after walking down the Aisle are not limited to the following:

1. Marriage is for those that know and accepted Christ: Christian marriage and relationships are for those that have relationship with God. Adam could hear from God (Gen 2:18). If Adam was not hearing from God, how would he have known what God said and how God walked in the Garden of Eden and what God was doing? If you don’t have relationship with God how do you hear from Him and how will He instruct you? Anyone that is not hearing from God, will surely be fed with own deceptive and hell bound revelation by Satan.

2. Maturity (Physical and spiritual) and ability to work and walk with God are part of key ingredients needed: God formed man in Gen 2:7. Man was taken by God and put in the garden to dress and keep it Gen 2:8; 15. Walk: If Adam had no relationship with God there was no he could have walked with God and be taken into the vineyard. Work: working in God’s vineyard, taking to ensure His vineyard and all the creatures were taken care of. Your ability to manage God’s vineyard would determine the kind of family vineyard God would commit into your hands. He that is faithful in little would be faithful in much. (Matthew 25:23; Luke 16:10).

3. God determines who and when one is ripe for marriage: Gen 2:18. As stated within the introduction, it was not Adam’s age, wisdom, or his level of spirituality and work or walk with God that formed his decision to have help meet but God thought it wise that it was time. The same way Abraham had relationship with God ensured his household did the same in marriage. Abraham based on God’s instruction 18:19; 23:8; 23: 3-24. God was confident that Abraham will train his household including his servants His ways in Gen. 18:19 and His servant demonstrated that in Gen 23. It wasn't Isaac that determined the time to marry.

4. God institutionalized marriage: Gen: 2:18; Gen 2:21-25. God is creator of all things including marriage hence we are supposed to depend on Him and not making our choices selfishly and expect Him to rubber stamp our own will.

5. Not all helpers are help meet: Not everyone or helper you meet that would be your God’s desired help meet. (Gen 2:19-20). No matter how nice, beautiful, spirit filled and helpful our friends could be , until we ask God, they might just be help like horse, dog, monkeys , donkeys that are for companionship, security and burden bearers for the time being and not God’s perfect help meet. Lots of marriages today were built on permissive will of God because spouses married the burden bearers and not help meet. Until Adam saw God’s perfect will –Eve, he never saw his help meet in the other animals. Adam could have chosen Monkey as help meet since monkey looks close and like man but no. He waited for God to select for him.

6. No perfect being: Right from the fall of Adam and Eve, humans are not perfect and as stated above both parties have work to do to make the relationship work. Gen: 3:6-7; 22 (They know good and evil before then, they only knew good and no evil). There is no perfect marriage on earth till we get to heaven. Expect the best of your spouse, pray and be prepared to assist and tackle any misbehavior from your spouse.

7. Christianity is not a shield from challenges and issues of life: That we (you and I) are Christians and married or single Christians does not excuse our relationship from challenges: Adam and Eve’s marriage was initiated by God but they were tempted by Satan (Gen. 3:1-ff), Abraham and Sarah obeyed God but still had issue of bareness to God’s own time Gen 21:1-2. Job was married with children and did not sin but was still tempted. Hannah was happily married but God shut her womb (1 Sam.1:5C). God knew about the marriage plan between Mary and Joseph (Jesus ’earthly parents), Joseph could have abounded Mary from human point of view if not for God’s intervention. Matthew 1:19-25. This does not mean we should relax during affliction, temptation or challenges cos the same scripture said many are the affliction of the righteous by God delivers him from them all (Psalms 34:19).

8. Every marriage has its own challenge: Most times God’s way are not man’s way Isiah 55:8-9: What we humans sees as challenges might be God’s best way of blessing us. Like the Lord shutting Hannah’s womb all because He wanted someone better to replace Eli and his two sons. 1 Sam 1:5; 1 Sam.16:7. If Samuel could have almost anointed someone wrongly it means we are still not perfect and God ways are human ways. God did not reveal to Paul those that wanted him dead Acts 23:12-13. No wonder Paul confirm what Deuteronomy 29:29 said in 1Corinthians 13:9:12. That we see and know in parts and this is dependent on God’s decision. So don’t blame any Christian or minister of God that is facing any challenge.

9. Human beings and their Adamic Nature: Human beings are the most difficult to understand and manage. Even in management, human resources are the most difficult among other resources such as Capital, Land, Machine and others. The reason for this is because of humans’ ability to think, their ability to manage and influence other resources (which is dominion-ship given by God in Gen.1:28), ability to get influenced by peers, environment and time. All these we sometimes term as free will. The free will has its trigger from either our heart or mind. It is this free will that made Eve and Adam to go against God’s instruction (Gen 3:6-7). It is same free will that made God to repent for creating man in Gen 6:5-6. On this note, you may not be able to understand or know your spouse fully till kingdom come except the person dwells continuously in the fullness of the Holy Spirit. Remember Adam never expected that Eve would eat the forbidden fruit but he still collected the same fruit and ate, neither would Abraham have ever thought (in their early time in relationship) that Sarah would advise him to impregnate Hagar and also advise him to chase Ishmael and his mum out of the same home. Everyone has a weakness. The Adamic Nature makes you, me and everyone have weakness. May the Lord give us the Spirit that will subdue our Adamic Nature forever in Jesus name. Amen

10. Marriage is not a contract: Gen. 2:24; Matthew 19:5-6. Most people see marriage as contract that could either be signed, bridged or pull from. It is the only institution you get certified, before commencement and one does not graduate from it, meanwhile other institutions of learning would commence and graduated from before one get certified.

Genesis 2:24[24]Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.

Matthew 19:5-6

[5]And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? [6]Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.

11. God is still in the business of searching for spouse: Lots of people quote (Proverb 18:22). Whoever finds wife and what Adam said in Gen 3:12 .That that is the reason stopped giving his sons wife. That is a wrong notion. Our God does not and cannot change. He is the same God yesterday today and forever. (Hebrew 13:8). He still directs the steps of any willing righteous male or female. (Pslam37: 23)

Proverbs 18:22[22]Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD.

Genesis 3:12[12]And the man said, The woman whom thou gavest to be with me, she gave me of the tree, and I did eat.

Hebrews 13:8

[8]Jesus Christ the same yesterday, and to day, and for ever. God cannot change His ways because of the statement or mistake made by any man .

12. Love and submission: God expects wives to submit to their husbands while husband are to love their wives in return whilst the husband must also recognize and play the role as the head of the family in all area (like Christ did for the church) which include but not limited to provision for the family, praying and protecting the family among others. (Eph.5:22-23.) It has almost become a saying in our world today that once there is no money, no love and no marriage. That is against what the Bible says.

Conclusion

Marriage is a misery that can only be understood, enjoyed, managed and be blessed if and when humans allow the author and institutional of marriage to take the lead and be in total control at all times.