Karma or balance?
I never thought that after this day I was going to sit down at the laptop to write a publication, but the truth is that I have understood that when you go through strong things that unbalance you or have some noticeable effect on you, the best thing is to vent, talk about it , put it in different contexts to see if that way the load or the effect is diminished.
The truth is that as I write these lines my eyes are watery enough to think that at any moment I would start crying, it is not because of physical pain, nor is it due to lack of love, not at all, rather it is about life as a whole and the fact that when you are doing important things, in one way or another something always happens that stops you or tries to do it.
I think that more than frustrated, I have an inexplicable feeling inside of what I have called karma, because the truth is that in this last year many good things have happened to me that I had always wanted and far beyond my real expectations.
And I mean a karma when in reality it should be a balance of life, an invisible scale but quite sensible where good is on one side and evil on the other.
I don't remember who the person was, but there are many times we hear "after the storm comes calm", in my case the opposite is happening, the calm becomes a rather tedious storm.
It is not a secret that the economy of our country is horrible, that the opportunities to work in offices or hours are reduced taking into account the payment and how little you can do with it; That is why I have always said that Hive is a blessing that people who have the opportunity to be here should treasure it and value it before doing something foolish.
I have said it many times but I must emphasize, renting life is disgusting, savings do not exist and that is why new projects came into my life together with my partner and my daughter Danna.
However, everything has been clouded from the beginning, because the worst thing that humans can do is expect that things will happen or can happen as they plan or think, reality is totally raw and cruel.
Even so, as humans we do not give up, even more so knowing that by achieving this project we will obtain some peace.
Although our plans had been simplified and calculated, even with this I must say that for me, especially for me, it has been complicated and frustrating.
I think that I have expressed to all the people I have met that I am a person who likes to follow certain administrative patterns, above all planning, so that the margin of error is as small as possible.
Words should not be thrown to the wind just as things should not be told with an "I believe" when you are not sure of it, and much more if this implies that it can have an impact on a third party, and we are talking about a monetary term. , that although I remind you in my country it is VERY important, since it is jodi... to obtain it.
With this I do not want to blame, I think that the culprit is me according to what I believe, for trusting completely and not making sure that what they say is true, it is best to count with the eyes and not with the fingers.
In the same way, I must learn not only to say repeatedly that things cannot be left in the hands of another, I must act and do things my way, because if they still go wrong, I do not think I feel even twice How bad can I feel right now?
Today was a rainy day, apart from being tense I was quite worried about the fact that I'm in debt, something that hasn't even been a week and I'm already thinking about how to pay, however, Danna is a wonderful thing, she usually gives me a temporary calm that it makes me forget everything, I really wish it wasn't that way, but rather permanent.
But the day has more than 12 hours of which I can be in the street doing a thousand things and among them the karma or balance is present. Well, after getting some excellent budgets and in a certain way having concentrated on being able to achieve everything that has come my way in recent days, another chaos is upon me.
From a cup of chocolate dreamed of by the family, a time belt breaks and leaves us injured almost drifting. We had the plan to end the long day with my family but, as I told you, there is the existing but not palpable balance of life.
Something good happened early, it's time for something bad to happen. I'm not saying that I'm going to normalize it, but it really seems that life works this way, as if you have to give it a sacrifice quota and that way everything stays in order.
Earlier I had sent a voice note to a very important person and whom I esteem very much, and I couldn't stand it, with a broken voice I practically asked for help because I didn't know what to do, I didn't know who he was and I didn't know what was happening to me either. From so much pressure that I had, I exploded in a way that maybe that person could think that I was going crazy. It was at that moment that Danna approached me, perched on my arm and it was as if she was inviting me to see the outside, to breathe. That in the end I did.
But sometimes like at the end of this afternoon, as a human I can't just breathe, except when I feel things inside me that tell me to run, scream, cry! or even sometimes, it ends with you.