James Bong - Agent Of Anarchy - Episode 8 (Science Fiction - Comedy)

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2 years ago

James Bong – Episode 8


Scene 1


K is dancing to Michael Jackson’s “Billy Jean”. He’s wearing a Star Wars t-shirt, tight high-water jeans, and a fedora. He thinks he’s alone…..


Miss Moneybit (giggling): Hey K.


K (shocked, gasps): Hey, how’d you get in here?!


Miss Moneybit: Symphy let me in.


K (turning to Symphy): You’re not programmed to let people in without my authorization!


Symphy: Miss Moneybit made a very convincing argument which overrode my programming.


K (arms folded): Do tell.


Symphy (innocent smile): She said that allowing her to see you dance would be a great lesson in humor for me and that any improvement to myself would ultimately benefit you.


K: Interesting logic.


Moneybit (still giggling): I haven’t told you the best part! I’m filming this!


K: Not funny.


Moneybit: Not a joke. This should earn a handsome profit on Dtube.


K: Where’s the camera?


Moneybit: Hidden on me. And no, you’re not allowed to look for it.


K (whiny): You’re not really posting it on Dtube, are you?


Moneybit: Oh, relax. No, I’m not.


K (relieved): Whew, thanks.


Moneybit (satisfied grin, ear to ear): I’ll just save it for a special time when I need to blackmail you.


K (sighing): So what brings you by?


Moneybit: I’m bored and my Spanish isn’t so good, so my options are limited.


K: Your brutal honesty is appreciated.


Moneybit: And I’ve had a bit of tequila, too. Where’s Bong?


K: Getting away from it all.

Moneybit: Even you?


K: Especially me.


Moneybit: Do you have any idea where he goes?


K: Nope. That’s how he is. Enigmatic to the core.


Moneybit: And he has no family?


K: So he says. Anytime the subject is broached, he gets edgy.


Symphy: K, I’m sorry to interrupt, but there is breaking news regarding altcoins that I think you’ll find pertinent.


K: Thanks, Symphy. Throw it on the holoscreen.


A hologram of a news broadcast coming from the BBC pops up in the middle of K’s living room.


K: Wow, Symphy, you were right. This is big. The English government is putting a 20 percent tax on all altcoin transactions.


Moneybit: Which means that most merchants will either stop accepting altcoins, or people will stop purchasing with them. Or both.


K: True. But this might end up being a disadvantage to them in the long run. It’ll push altcoins onto the black market.


Moneybit: You mean the real free market.


K: I stand corrected, yes, the free market. Prices will spike and altcoins will become more popular than ever!


Moneybit: The best of times.


K: And the worst of times. Symphy, end transmission. I can’t stand to listen to these presstitutes any longer than necessary.


Hologram disappears.


Scene 2


General Small is talking to Sir Hugo Trax via holocall in General Small’s office at CIA headquarters.


Trax: Did you find bugs in your office?


Small: Yep! We found a ton of em!


Trax: I can only imagine how those magically appeared. And don’t act so boisterous when you’re announcing that our communications have been compromised.


Small: Yes, sir.


Trax: Anyway, I assume they’ve been destroyed.


Small: Yes, sir.


Trax: So now that Bong doesn’t have access to our systems anymore, we need to find a way to get him to England.


General Small: You want me to do what?


Trax: Get Bong to England.


Small: You’re in London. I’m in the US. Why do you need my help?


Trax (facepalming): Good point. I don’t know why I should ever ask you for help on anything. I don’t even know why I keep you around.


Small: Because you know that whoever takes my place will be just as incompetent.


Trax: True enough. Ok, back to Bong. Do you have any ideas on how to lure him here?


Small: Well, I always like a good honeytrap.


Trax: I’m sure you do. Bong is too smart for that, though.


Small: How about this? We could spot him on grid surveillance and send a team after him.


Trax: We can’t just attack a super spy out in the open like that. We’d get way too much unwanted attention.


Small: We could threaten his loved ones.


Trax: He’s a loner, remember?


Small: How about a bribe?


Trax: Your ideas, amazingly enough, are getting worse. Unlike us, he has morals. Bribes are out of the question.


Small: What can we give him that he wants?


Trax: I think I’ve got it. He doesn’t have loved ones, but he does have moral principles that he cares about.


Small: Moral what?


Trax: Yes, nearly a foreign language to guys like us, I know. Anyway, I’ve got an idea for the perfect bait. See ya, Small.


Small: Wait! You’re not gonna tell me?


Trax: If I need something screwed up, I’ll call you.


Scene 3


James Bong is sitting at the bar and lounge in the Seehof Hotel in Davos, Switzerland. He is alone with the bartender.


Bong (to bartender): Another scotch and soda, please.


Bong stirs the ice with his finger in the empty rocks glass in front of him as he stares sadly and blankly into space. A striking, young female dressed to impress approaches Bong.


Female: Is this seat taken?


Bong (continues distant stare): The entire bar is taken.


Female (to bartender): I’ll have what he’s having. (sits next to Bong) You’re a very wanted man in London, you know.


Bong (glances at female): I’m a very wanted man in many places.


Bartender delivers drinks. Bong gulps his down.


Female (amused): You’ve crossed some very influential people in certain circles. They’re trying to find a way to get you to London quietly.


Bong (amused): The ever-nebulous “they”.


Female: Do you know who I am?


Bong: Mary Poppins.


Female: Diana Gateschild.


Bong turns and looks her up and down.


Bong: They sent you to find me?


Diana (scoffing): Hardly.


Bong: Then what are you doing here?


Diana: I came here to warn you.


Bong: Warn me about what?


Diana: To not go to England. Not on their terms, at least.


Bong: They can murder me anywhere in the world. Why is England so damn special?


Diana: Because they know about your past and want to keep things localized and quiet. They might also think that you can be turned.


Bong: And how do you know all this?


Diana: Because members of the ruling class can be exceedingly paranoid and take certain precautions.


Bong: You mean you spy on each other.


Diana gives knowing smile.


Bong: And why are you helping me?


Diana: Because I want to do what’s right.


Bong: How touching.


Diana (stands up): Look, James, my gut tells me that at some point you’ll want to confront your past. When that time comes, you can go to England on your own terms and have a chat with the Gateschild brothers. At least if you go on your own terms, you can surprise them and have a chance at survival. But until then, be weary of any temptations they might throw your way. My father can be very clever. Goodbye, James. I’ll be watching you.

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