How I Went to Hell and Came back Alive. 😭😭

Sometimes when people argue that hell is not real, I just look at them, shake my head and I laugh.

I'll tell you this for free, hell is everywhere.

Hell fire is in that 2 pm sun which shines directly into your skull through the neat braids your hair stylist made for you to punish you because you paid her 2k and promised to pay the remaining 3k which you have refused to pay even after 4 months.

Hell is your room at 1am, after two unfortunate mosquitoes have managed to find their way into your room and NEPA goes ahead to honour them with pitch darkness, amidst the mighty heat of March.

It's in pepper, fresh pepper, scotch bonnet pepper and the likes that whisper your name in the market on a Saturday morning when you are thinking of what to cook.

I went to hell few days days ago. I died, resurrected, died again and went to hell. 😭😭😭

I saw lucifer seated on his gaint brown throne of nothingness, giving orders to my ex and other of his agents. 😒😒

I was at the market last Saturday when I saw this very fresh yellow pepper. You know that yellow pepper that traders normally sell 4 for ₦50?

That one.

I thought about the wonderful dishes I could prepare with them, seeing that the portions for sale would not be bad for ₦100. It got more interesting when the trader told me they were sold for ₦50/portion instead.

Awufu!

That was how I ended up buying 10 portions for ₦500 after which the woman gave me two extra portions as bonus.

'This pepper would last me for 1 month if I preserve it well' I tought myself. I thought of peppersoup first. 😋😋

I went ahead to buy other ingredients for the dish. Then I went to a mill in that market to grind the whole pepper.

On getting home, I poured out the whole of it into a big bowl that has its own lid and covered. I was going to preserve when I remembered that I have not removed the portion I needed for my peppersoup.

I lifted the lid of my pepper bowl, removed the quantity I needed for my peppersoup and covered it again but this time I forgot to tighten the lid of the bowl.

Trying to pick up the bowl again, I picked the lid instead and the whole content, no, the whole pepper, all the grinded yellow pepper dumped themselves on my body.

Some even found their way into my left eye.

And... and... Some thing are just better left unsaid.

The End!

😭😭😭😭