Part 1: Meeting Parents' Expectation

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4 years ago

Did you get here because the title was intriguing? Or you are here because the topic I'll write about shouts so loud that everyone here can understand? We have all been on the stage of life where we are too focused on meeting our parents' expectation.

Maybe you don't remember your first 10 steps. Where Mom and Dad were telling to you take a one step, and when you did, they'll move farther so you could continue walking to them. You wanted to take those steps towards Mom and Dad because you're afraid you might do it wrong and hurt yourself. But also, you wanted to go to them because you can see their faces smiling and cheering you. You want to hug them while smiling too after doing what they told you to do.

Remember being in pre-school? Where Mom teaches you how to color, how to draw and how to write down your name? You ain't doing it better because you really wanted to, but because Mom is right in front of you with her long wooden stick she will absolutely use to beat you if you won't do what she's telling you to finish.

Remember when you are starting to learn how to bike? Mom and Dad were there looking on how you take the first pedal. You are eager to show them what you can do even if you are afraid of biking without your Dad's support in the back. You were afraid but you saw them cheering you, so you started doing it.

Remember when you started at grade school, where being on top matters to your Mom. She trained and educated you too well during the summer vacation so you could be ready on your 1st grade. She wants you to be on top and be competitive, so you did. And you are on top. But maintaining it was hard specially because at the same time you wanted to enjoy your childhood. You had a grade of 80 and you were scolded at home. You need to do better than that, they say. You see them checking your class card and compares it from time to time. I meant was if you are having a low grade or high.

We all those instances in life during our childhood where we are too afraid looking at our parents' furious faces because we did something wrong or we disappoints them. We are also driven by fear of what will our parents will be saying after knowing the things we have done that they don't support us in doing. The process of molding us up started out there, by letting us be driven and controlled by fear. We are too focused on thinking about our Moms and Dads back then. We fear them so much and we don't like to be compared with any other kid in the neighborhood so we are doing everything we can to avoid it from happening.

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Do you remember something in your childhood? Or when you were at the ages of 6-12? I'll surely read them, feel free to share it and write down in the comment section. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING!

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4 years ago

Comments

I don't actually feel pressured with my parents. Back in elementary and highschool i always study hard and work hard not because my parents told me to do so but because i want to. I love how they become happy every time I'm included in top 10 in our class. Tho I remember how my mom taught me how to draw back when I was in daycare, she'll draw house with fence and stick drawings of our family members. As a kid I always think that house can only be called "a house" if there is a fence hahah because that's how my mom draw it. My mom also scold and hit us every time we play outside and won't come home on time. She's a nurse and always put for work, overtime and on duty even on holidays (she's also away from us because of work when i was a kid) so she really wanted to see us inside our house every time she come home. I grew up with my dad beside me, I am afraid of him in a sense that i don't want to make him mad so I always follow him. I admire him so much and we're very close. Waahhh i miss my dad every singe time. Thank you for this article I have a lot of stories to tell but I'll end it here haha.

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4 years ago

Aww. I really love the way you shared your relationship with your parents. And yes, some parent do not really pressure their kids specially now that kids seem sensitive, lol. But I'm glad you didn't experienced being imprisoned with parents' expectations.

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4 years ago

Most parents have fprgotten all about doing things that will make their kids respect them. All they want to do is rule by FEAR. Good Grades and Their Own Career choices were used to trap us in this need to 'make them proud', even if it does not make us happy.

I'm glad that as I got older, I learned to voice out my opinion forcefully. When they saw that they wouldn't manipulate me, they gave up on it, even if it meant calling me a black sheep.

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4 years ago

As I was getting older too, I learned that we should also decide for our own without concerning our parents' opinion about it. I mean, there are decisions we make for ourselves too. Right?

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4 years ago