On the last day of the first month of the 20th century, one of my mentees (I hope he still is) fantasised publicly about how his dream and future wife must be wired exactly like one popular American public officer. I knew people have those weird and crazy ambitions, but I never believed things had reached such giddy heights. I am not unaware that that the craze to want to be another person or covet another's spouse, house, lifestyles, culture, or finances is even worse in religious settings. If the foundation be destroyed.
Why would a human being crave to have been another? I put that down to five self-explanatory causes, namely: greed, ingratitude, defeatism, ignorance and ungodliness. A person who does not suffer from any of the five understands that in life things are not always as they seem. Masters of the language and those in the linguistic domain will say that greed is an intense and selfish desire to have many, more, much if not everything.
Even the Holy book does not frowns at owning money, but the love, greed for money is the unblessed blessing, “...a feast is made for laughter, and wine makes merry; but money answers everything.” "the love of money is a root of all kinds of evils". We cannot clearly and comfortably deny the deadly consequences of it, it destroys relationships at work, home, and everywhere, above all it kills. It can be likened to a pyrhic victory which is a victory which is not worth wining because the winner has lost or suffered so much in winning it, named after Pyrrhus , the king of Epirus.
Ingratitude? Here you become a non living thing according to elementary science, you are insensitive to people's generosity, you payback peace with war, you payback good with evil, someone's hard-earned patience with impatience. Few traits are as distasteful to us as ingratitude. All of us have felt a twinge of anger when our hard work or generous gesture went unappreciated by someone. But more than just socially unacceptable, ungratefulness has terrible effects on our spiritual lives and is deplored by our God.
Ignorance? Here you lack elementary and adequate knowledge about a thing, concept, opinion, name them. Know this, ignorance is not an excuse. Let borrow this legal phrase "Ignorantia juris non excusat or ignorantia legis neminem excusat is a legal principle holding that a person who is unaware of a law may not escape liability for violating that law merely by being unaware of its content. Defeatism and all other unblessed blessings follows in the same path.
A lady may be salivating over a husband whose wife is dying to get out. Another man may imagine that his life would be complete if he took over Mr. B's wife not knowing she has finished her husband. Not all that glitters is gold brothers and sisters. By the way, what do you really desire were yours in a (wo)man that you envy: the outward part, or the inside, or the total package? Do you know their secret pain(s)/story?
Getting obsessed with being someone else might be a human pastime but anyone without a complex (inferiority or superiority) will never consider let alone do it. While we may all laugh it off as one of those things which will not hurt, desperately seeking to be another person can kill our morale, our inner person. Do you know anybody who suddenly stopped living, somebody who changed overnight becoming withdrawn or sad, even sadistic and pugnacious? (S)he must have lost the 'I want to be that person' battle!
And no one should go through that nonsense. Everyone has a baggage or rather, a dustbin. You don't want to know what that famous idol, that rich neighbour, that loving family and that beautiful couple whose place you seek face when the cameras go off. Or what road they'd travel tomorrow. Or indeed, if in future they'd crash to an all-time low. Or would you then still wish to switch places? Be careful what you envy, Dear. Be happy for you. You are the best of you; no good second, no carbon copy.
My dear stay off these unblessed blessings!