@carisdaneym2
edited
more from that month
Just Rants.
These past few days, I am being emotional. It feels like depression is tormenting me again. Writing here while expressing my deepest emotion makes my problems lighter than the air and I can easily put myself back into pieces while trying to build a new life that will give me another chance to refresh everything. ****School****
My vacation will come to an end very soon. After a few more days, our asynchronous class will start again and of course, my journey of stressful and frustrations will undertake the process. Some Professors won't get the dilemma I am withstanding just to survive the semester. Imagine, having poor Internet connection while having a discussion about Law on obligations and Contracts then after that, you will be having a surprise quiz. Because of this, I won't be able to catch up since I did not discern the course unless I will have my exploration. I never conversed to my classmates regarding our lessons since we can access all the information needed on our subjects through Google classroom, zoom and whatever social media platform they are using to disseminate the lectures except for all the group projects. Nothing seems to be adequate due to the lack of explanation and concentration. ****Work****
Last December when I resign to my part-time job. I certainly enjoy my four years of memories working there. I do love hardware stuff, I discover different process and materials needed to build a house. Meeting Engineers, Architects, Carpenters, Construction workers, Agents, Businessman, LGUs and many more. But the toughest problems that I confront is dealing with those types of customers, I need to comprehend skillfully just to match the idea they are visualizing and make some suggestions that will suit their taste. I'm not just a mere sales lady, every kind of work is hard but when you enjoy something that you are doing, you can feel the exaggeration of excitement every time you are doing it wholeheartedly. It is not about them why I quit, It is because of the toxicity of the environment, I thought that it will be satisfactorily to refresh everything. I want my year 2021 to get another exploration to the world of others, such as "crypto world " I want something new this year and challenge myself into different types of struggles in life. I want a new life for the reason that I will be facing this year as not a teenager anymore. Let's move forward. ****Friends****
In the realm of my world. I have a small circle of friends, but here I guess I can befriend with everyone because no one will judge me (maybe my writing skills considering it sucks) someone said it to me that It is noteworthy to manufacture camaraderie in this community and I agree with that. They showered me with overpowering love and support and I am very gratified by their actions💗 you know who you are guys. But let's go-to reality where whenever I gave trust to someone, they instantly shattered it. I just remember this my so-called best friend, she understood my situation that we're not a damn rich family but I let her borrow some money from me but yeah until now she didn't settle with me. But she's bragging how well-off her life is by posting Instagramable images of her beautiful face. (She's kinda pretty so many of the people surrounding her was fooled) I know her, I understand her because I know she just wants fame but the fact that she's ignoring me now about the money she borrowed from me, I just want to know her reasons, of course, I will understand her because somewhat somehow we're mates. Hoping that she'll reply soon. ****Family****
Strengths and weaknesses, Motivation and demotivation, Inspiration and aspiration. What would it be? Your life, of course, source of energy and everything. Our dearest family makes who we are now, they helped us to build a better interpretation of ourselves that makes us dominant now. Remembering the old days when you're still young, wild and free hmm how are you now? Living better or worst? Anyways whatever your reason affect your family. You will never know how to walk and stand up without their guidance and support when you're still young. **Author's note:** https://branch.wallet.bitcoin.com/pRw3SWAlodbp Anyways I just can't sleep so I decided to write what my deepest thoughts every midnight since I don't have anyone to converse with. Just another boring thoughts in the middle of the night. Goodnight everyone. Let me add my cutie giphy to make it as one of my non-sense but make sense article 🙈 trying hard to type this on my phone. Again let us enjoy our life while we have it. Thank you for reading, God bless😇
.w.
27 comments
Thank you for sharing! Many are experiencing depression and anxiety, feeling isolated and unable to progress. Your struggles with bad internet connection and schooling sounds very frustrating. :(
Thank you for the upvote and reading my rants tonight😬😪 I just can't help but think to again about my life, specifically college life. Having a social dilemma and everything. I need some rest but I just can't so I wrote this just to calm myself. Internet here in the Philippines 🇵🇭 is like a turtle net😪
You are not alone. A lot of us feel the same as you. This rants will help you exteriorize your feelings.
Super. Anyways thanks for reading my rants haha💖
It's normal. I think all of us is struggling, it's just that others are good in hiding it. I had anxieties and been depressed 2 yrs ago.. writing my thoughts helped me to cope.. I hope you're sleeping by now.
I hope that you are doing fine now. Actually, I just woke up ahhh I need more sleep🙈
Although I'm from a different walk of life, I can definitely relate with writing for stress relief. Something about externalizing your thoughts with writing helps break that cycle of repetitive thoughts and circular reasoning. Which is what worrying is about. Keep strong. 🙂
Thank you so much 😍 you know, I am bad at writing but I do enjoy sharing my thoughts through writing (something like a diary)💖 Btw I want to know your nickname😅 We've been interacting but idk how to address you. 💓
😅😅 true. My dad nicknamed me: NG Due to an inside joke Hehe You can call me that too or La Grapefruit is fine as well. Is Caris your nickname?
So lagrapefruit is ur real name (cute)😹 can I call u LG instead? and how old are u? You can call me car, cari, caris, cardo, whatever u like haha 🙈 btw I'm 🙋
😄😄😄 lagrapefruit is just my username. But yes LG works too. I'm 28. I like caris hehe
Oh, shoot. I'm turning 20 next month 😅🤣🤩
Heehee take lots of pictures, trust me. 20s go by super fast!
Ang cute ng GIF. paano Yan? haha. Anyway you are still young don't shoulder all the responsibility it might be too heavy. But just Glad you finally let your heart out and hopefully it ease your feeling. Writing in here is the best way too cope my little depression lol. It will occupy and busy our mind. But you are still young. Wag masyadong damdamin dahil Ang buhay at ganyan lamang . haha parang kanta to😅
Salamat ate leejhen hahaha ang buhay nga naman ay parang life hahaha Yung gif po sa GIPHY app ko ginawa hahaha
wow thanks subukan ko Yan😇
Opo ate madali lang gumawa don 💖
We have our own struggles. I am pretty sure you can handle them. Cheer up like what you said to me before, kaya mo yan! ❤
Thanks ate mel💗
Do you use a messenger app like Discord or Telegram? I've gone through similar experiences with depression and anxiety, so if you'd ever like to chat about life, let me know, and I'll shoot you a friend request.
[deleted]
> carisdaneym2 The same as here? I tried searching for you and nothing comes up. My username is @lucascosolo
okay, I'll search you.
We all had share of different struggles to life. I too want to resign with my work, but I don't want to left my work not finishing all the works assigned to me. I really want to go, it is completely draining me. I am struggling to wakeup everyday, I feel like losing all my shi** together. But I will not give up. :) Let us not give up. :)
I do admire your perseverance for doing that. 💖 yeah giving up is not a choice haha
People are hard to please... To live the life you want, you must develop the courage to pursue what you want while ignoring peoples opinion.
Yeah, but sometimes ignoring is not the only way for that. People tend to accept and respect their sentiments and perspectives about the subject yet provoke that as inspiration and motivation to keep going. That's just my rants, after all, releasing my hatred and accept it later makes me satisfied by expressing it tru writing.