What is control sickness and how to get rid of this habit?

We all have a little bit of control disease. We make plans for the future, we want to have everything under control, we don't want anything to go wrong. Are we going to have guests in our garden? We immediately start thinking about all kinds of weather conditions, we evaluate all the possibilities we can think of so that there is no problem. Or if we are going on a trip with our child, we think, "Will he get sleepy, will he get cranky if he can't sleep well?" In other words, we waste our already limited and precious time and energy trying to control everything that is out of our hands. I have scrutinized what is known as control sickness or "control mania", and listed the symptoms of control sickness and what you can do about it. 

Symptoms

If you let go of control, you are afraid that what you have in mind will happen.

You focus on a certain outcome as if you know what is best for you.

You expect others to change one or more of their behaviors so that you will be happier. So you constantly try to help them by pointing out their behavior.

You try to make others conform to your expectations, which are often not realistic at all. There is no room for imperfection in your vocabulary, and you want others to be the same way.

You choose to judge others' behavior as right or wrong until it aligns with your expectations. Pontificating from where you sit is the height of control sickness.

You use constructive criticism to make progress on your own plans.

In order to be accepted, you compromise what you believe in, you compromise yourself, you don't appear as you are. Instead of being yourself, you attempt to deceive people by trying to manage their impression of you.

You present the worst possible scenarios in order to dissuade people from certain behaviors.

You are surrounded by uncertainties and are frustrated by not knowing how things will turn out.

You intervene on people's behalf in an effort to explain their behavior to others.

The art of surrender

We've listed the characteristics of controlling people, but how about letting go of control and mastering the art of surrender? Here are our suggestions.

If I let go of control, will what I fear happen to me?

When you identify the source of your fear, you validate it with your question. Ask yourself. Are you afraid that your night will be ruined if, despite a thousand reminders, your lover shows up without the baking powder for your cake? Question this possibility. Will your night be wasted without baking powder? If so, what makes the situation so bad?

Whose business are you in?

Your sphere of dominance is limited to an area that you can directly influence. But are you within that sphere? Or are you busy with other people's business? When we try to control things outside our own business, things will not go well.

Is it freedom to let things go?

By letting go, it is possible to feel as free as a bird. Allow this sense of freedom to guide you as you strive to reduce your frenzy for control.

Empathize

Try to look at the world from the perspective of others. This kind of objective approach can be difficult for control freaks. But by empathizing, you gain dignity and insight into people's own world.

Take steps towards becoming less controlling

Take steps to stop being overly controlling. Learn to trust. Do you work somewhere? Listen to your colleagues' ideas. Don't try to take control of everything at once, thinking that they can't handle a task the way you want them to. Even if your paths to a solution are not the same, you will accept it when you see the result being achieved.