Hello Darkness, My Old Friend

I'm a bit sad to hear your story. Well, I suggest that you explore life more than spending most of your time working. Enjoy life and be happy, don’t focus yourself and mind on the just working alone for earnings and helping. That’s why there’s a balance. We humans are indeed emotional in nature and can get easily disappointed and get sad. We really need time to enjoy things in order to refresh our minds and thoughts. Sadness really comes to our life but it’s up to us on how we overcome it. I’m glad that you’re no longer thinking suicidal stuff. I know depression could not be taken lightly for all cases but it’s really up to us on how we deal in order to overcome it. You stay strong and be brave. Enjoy life and be happy.. this is the way on how you will treasure and value life. Life is previous and valuable as all we know. Please take good care of it. Disappointments may come but always remember that “God takes away when he has something better than to give”

P.S. I really like the 1st video that you have included in this article. Thanks.(:-)

Bagay na bagay po sa inyo yung songs of encouragement entitled "Who Am I" by Casting Clowns. Stay Safe po and god bless.

You sound like you have depression. Even with medication and therapy, MDD (Major Depressive Disorder) never goes away. We are like Type 1 diabetics. No cure. The best at can do is manage it. And manage our behaviors. I say "we" because I have been diagnosed with MDD (and a bunch more but that's not what this comment is about). It sounds like you are doing a great job managing behaviors!! I'm so happy you aren't having suicidal thoughts. When we are down, it actually helps to listen to angry or sad music. It can be very cathartic. Also because our depression is mostly brain chemistry, we don't necessarily have a reason fire feeling sad or a target for our anger. The sad music let's us release some of our pent up feelings. Nobody, not even people with typical brain chemistry, is happy all the time. If you ever want to talk, feel free to reach out. I'll try to check on you soon, too.

Kinda sounds like you might be going through a breakup, or maybe your crush is with somebody else. Also kinda sounds like something you spent a lot of time on didn't land as well as you'd hoped.

Heartbreak is real. It will take a real emotional toll on you. It will make you feel physical pain and sickness... and it sucks that it's something most of us will have to experience at some point in life. Life's gonna throw us punches now and again - it's up to us to deal with it the best we can. It's okay to get knocked down, but we shouldn't give up.

I'm glad that you're able to identify that your mood has changed and you are having depressed thoughts. Being able to realize that there is something wrong is an important step in being able to progress.

I hope you're able to take the time and space that you need to get better. Focus on some hobbies and things to try to take away some of the pain and find enjoyment in life again.

And don't feel that you need to apologize for expressing your feelings. Nobody is happy all the time, and having to carry extra weight on your shoulders isn't a good thing. I'm glad you were able to vent a bit and feel a bit better.

Tomorrow will bring a new day. Hopefully it will be better for you.

-sigh- I believe that there is something called Rule of Balance. And I believe that life has a funny way of keeping it.

Whenever you get to be overjoyed, next thing you know is you're going down the spiral and into the rabbit hole. Today you are all jumping and laughing together only to be mourning the next.

So now, whenever I get excited or glad about something I calm myself thinking what could be the price to pay later so I don't over engage in it and kinda be on the safe side.

I can't tell you how nor when, but all my thoughts of quitting and ending it all up were just gone. I guess, we can become stronger bit by bit as we go through of these several hardships. I may not know how you feel know, and I may not understand but I feel like sharing is important and we are all willing to listen.

That is the fallback when melancholy type of individuals (like myself) allows situations and circumstances govern my mood and my drive. I used to be like you listening to sad songs when emo hits and the darkness tries to grab a leg, but I switch to worship songs instead because when I (personally) change my concentration no longer on me, the darkness seemed to fade away; because that's what darkness wants, to be so concentrated on ourselves that we forgot who we truly are in the eyes of those who (and Who) love us.

Good that you are stronger within. But don't hang in the damp darkness too long because sunshine awaits to warm you up again. 😉

Be strong and shine! (And check your WAX)