Tuesday 24 may 2022
Being the first child in the family certainly provides a different experience when compared to the second, third, and so on. As the oldest child, the eldest is often expected to be a good example to his younger siblings. Even in society there is an assumption that the first child should be a role model.
Apart from being a role model, the eldest son is also often given the responsibility to be a parent in guiding and educating his younger sibling. For example, accompanying younger siblings while studying, taking care of younger siblings while playing, or carrying out various other activities to assist parents in providing supervision to younger children.
Some of these things sometimes become a burden that must be borne for the first child. Although in fact, it is not a responsibility that must be done by the first child, because after all the first child is a child. However, this has become a stereotype that has developed and been embraced by the community to this day.
Some examples of the burden of the following first child you have certainly experienced. Starting from the burden of responsibility that is carried into adulthood, less fortunate in terms of finance, to the burden of giving in and having to do everything.
Here are some of the burdens of the first child in society that may often be experienced in everyday life.
Get More Limits
The burden of the first child that may happen to you first is getting more restrictions. Usually, parents tend to loosen the rules for younger children, such as when to sleep, how much time to play with gadgets they can get, or other privileges because they are considered small.
As for the eldest child, at a certain age has more restrictions on some of these things. Usually with the reason to divide the time well between playing, resting, and studying.
Higher Standard The burden of the first child that often occurs next is the existence of a higher standard. In this case, the first child who gets a higher standard usually gets a greater sense of disappointment from his parents when he makes a mistake. This is a habit that often occurs in some people.
Although there are also parents who apply looser rules for their first child and consider it natural when their child makes a mistake.
Become a rolemodel
The next burden of the first child is to be a role model. Often the first child is expected to be a good role model for his younger siblings. This can be seen from the attitude of parents who give responsibility for the first child to behave and behave well so that they can be imitated for older children. This is one of the burdens of responsibility that is often experienced by the eldest child.
Become a Parent
Being a parent who provides supervision to his younger siblings is also one of the first burdens children often get. In addition to being a role model, the eldest child is also given the responsibility to assist parents in providing supervision and educating younger children.
Moreover, when both parents have died, the eldest child automatically takes on the role of being a parent figure for his younger siblings. This is one of the consequences that encourage the first child to always be emotionally ready to take responsibility.
The burden of the first child is also in the form of responsibilities that are carried into adulthood. This is still related to responsibilities as parents, where the first child will take on the role when both parents have died.
Where, the first child will be a substitute for parents for his younger siblings who are responsible for accompanying and guiding him in dealing with various problems. Of course this is a burden of responsibility that is not easy but inevitably the first child will do it.
Not Benefited Financially
It also includes the burden of the first child you may feel. In this case, the eldest child usually comes when the parents' financial condition is still minimal.
So often the first child does not get much experience as a child because of their limited financial condition. It's different when the second, third, or fourth child is born.
Where parents start to get a more established career and finances. That way, younger children get more facilities and experiences that can be enjoyed than the first child.
Not Listened
The burden of the first child can also be consequences that are not listened to. This happens, when the first child reports the unfavorable attitude or actions of his sister to the parents.
However, your parents often ignore your report, and your younger sibling's mistakes are considered normal because they are still young. So that the childish behavior of younger children is more relaxed.
This often creates a sense of injustice for the first child. If you experience this, you should communicate well with your parents in order to get an equally fair treatment. Must Share Everything The burden of the first and last child is having to share everything.
Not long after your parents had a second child, everything that was once yours became theirs too. In this case, you are obliged to share with your younger sibling when you get something. Whether it's in the form of food, toys, or something else.
Various facilities at home that you previously mastered must also be willing to be shared for shared use. This is one of the habits that often occurs and is experienced by the first child.
Lead image from unsplash
luckily I'm not the first child. Haha