Hi!
I'm just another new user here at read.cash. Don't ask me how I knew about this site, it's quite complicated. Well anyway...
I'm just here to share my story. Mostly, my posts would be about my travels. I'll also write about my random musings and quite occasionally, political opinions. I tried to make a blog on some other site, but I realized I'm really bad at coding and stuff so here I am with just words and pictures.
But since you're here and you've been probably lured by my title, I'll tell you who am I and what are the things I want to share to the world.
I was born and raised in the Philippines. We live in the slums along the Pasig River, in a 15 sq. ft. house. I am an only child and I grew up with my grandparents; both of my parents are Overseas Filipino Workers (OFWs). If you're not from the Philippines, I don't know if you're familiar about this, but there's an exodus of Filipino workers who find job opportunities abroad just to earn more; my parents are one of them. Although both of them are earning considerably more, I have never been spoiled all my life. We experienced eating steamed rice with junk food as viands, sold snacks on the streets, and experienced not eating at all for 2 days. Life (and money) was really hard.
As a side gig, I joined singing contests and earned extra even though I was just 4 years old. As a kid, it was just a game for me. The cheers from the crowd and the cash meant nothing to me back then, I just want to be heard.
When I was 7, my parents decided to buy a house in the province of Laguna (South part of the Luzon mainland). So my parents and I moved. Although they are not OFWs anymore, they still work from day to night in an industrial factory. I was mostly left alone. When I was 13, my parents decided that my uncle will be my guardian. That's when shit broke loose. It was hell. My parents still didn't know about it, but I was sexually abused by that horrid monster. I never said a word and kept silent until now (they still didn't know and I don't plan to tell them). I'm now 24 years old and I'm still scared.
If don't want any more horror story. Stop reading right here.
At 15, both my parent's went back abroad (in separate countries this time). After the horrid monster went away, another guardian took over; this time a middle-aged woman. One summer, my father went on a vacation. It was a normal day until around 2am, I heard an obscene noise in my father's bedroom, curiosity got me and I checked. And voila!! I'll leave to your imagination what I've seen there.
All of these messed me up big time. I used to be an active kid. I used to aim for the best grades, competed for different extra-curricular activities, and generally a cheerful child. After all these "series of unfortunate events" that occurred in my life, I found myself quiet, shy, and reserved. I built up walls to keep people outside. I only trust several people. It was years and years of feeling sad and numb both at the same time.
Still, I strived to finish with my studies. I took up a major in Tourism Management. My father made me take the course because he wants me to be a flight attendant (even though I have really low self-esteem). If it was me, I would have took a major in Journalism or Communication Arts, I just want to express myself in different ways, after all. But my grandparents told me that education is only key out of poverty so I still strived to get good grades. Deep inside me, I could have graduated Cum Laude if I took it seriously (not to brag). In 2016, I became the first degree holder in our clan.
Since I'm the only one who graduated with a degree, now that I'm working, my parents and grandparents expect lots from me (a high-paying job, remittances, cellphone loads, etc.).
I currently work in a real-estate developer and earns minimum wage.
Most of the time, just to end this string of misfortune, thoughts of just ending it all crosses my mind but I do not have the courage to execute the deed.
Deep inside me, I still hope for a better future. I often travel just to escape my thoughts and to be distracted. My life is not filled with rainbows and butterflies, so please forgive this long post. I just want to vent out somewhere.
Anyway, my next posts would be about my travels and random things. Enough with the drama.
Sorry for bothering you with such a long post.
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FIRST - DO NOT COPY MY POSTS. THERE'S THIS THING CALLED "COPYRIGHT" AND I'LL REPORT YOU IF YOU USE MY POSTS AND PICTURES WITHOUT MY PERMISSION!
SECOND - AS MUCH AS I WANT TO HEAR WHAT YOU THINK, I DO NOT WANT THAT NONSENSE "NICE ARTICLE DEAR" USELESS COMMENT. TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK SO WE CAN DISCUSS.
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THANKS.
