Am I torturing myself?

Hello, dear world. Again I am knocking at your door and asking your permission to let me in so that I can explain my situation with all of you.

Is there a race going on around me and I am not invited to participate? Yes, it is. Everyone is running as far as possible from one another so that they can share their own space but I think I am the one who is not doing it very well. I am not that type of guy who can run away from people but indeed right now I am actually acting like that. I have started keeping myself away from people. Actually there's a prison in my mind which is set by my soul.

I started believing that people will hurt me if I get close to them. I don't know this is right or wrong but deep in my mind I know that this is not right what I am doing. But do I have any choice? I am supposed to be someone's friend, someone's soulmate but now I am a lone wolf. I just prefer to be alone and stay at a corner with my own mess. Everybody around me just reminds me that what I have done is completely insane. I have many questions for them but I don't ask questions because they prefer to avoid those hard ones. The matter of fact they are actually avoiding me. I should be annoyed of that, shouldn't I?

Maybe I am suffering a lot and maybe I need counselling with the psychiatrist. One of my best friend called me a few days ago and suggested me to join them. He suggested me to walk away from this. Maybe he is right. Maybe I am torturing myself out of the limit. I don't know what I am doing is right or wrong but maybe it's the time that I should stop.