As a four-year-old, Tom used to cling on to his mother at every possible chance; fast forward by ten years he wouldn’t want his mom to enter his room; and now, when he is 25, Tom wouldn’t share his problems with his mom lest she gets worried. Isn’t that so typical of sons? A mother-son relationship is an emotionally overwhelming relationship that evolves.
So what makes this relationship so special yet complicated? MomJunction briefs you about the importance of the mother-son relationship, the influence of a mother on her son, and ways a mother can improve the bond with her son.
Mothers have a significant impact on their sons to the extent that the way they behave in their later years is attributed to their relationship with their mother. No other person understands a child better than a mother. Right from the time he is born till his adult years, a boy nurtures a deep-rooted bond with his mom. And this relationship is imperative for the overall development and emotional health of the child. Let’s see how a mother influences her son:
Emotionally intelligent: Boys who share a healthy relationship with their mothers from their early childhood are emotionally strong and are believed to have less behavioral problems in their lives. The strong bond between the mother and son makes him feel secure and confident. Studies indicate that boys who do not have a healthy bond with their moms in early childhood could be hostile and aggressive in their later years, or insecure in relationships and establishing goals, among others.
Dr. Pasco Fearon from the School of Psychology and Clinical Language Sciences, University of Reading, says, “Children with insecure attachments to their mothers, particularly boys, had significantly more behavioral problems, even when the behavioral problems were measured years later.
Emotionally strong and independent: A boy, who is loved and cared for by his mom, turns into a confident man. A study published in the August 2011 edition of Child Development says that unconditional love and acceptance of the mother reassures the son that he is lovable and capable of being a good friend and lover. The study also reveals that the more loving a mother is the fewer are the chances of the boy being distant and cold.
Good at academics: A mother who takes a keen interest in her son’s education helps him be good in his academics. Besides imparting education, she also helps him become emotionally adequate which is an absolute necessity for healthy living.
Have control over their behavior:Emotional intelligence imparted by the mother helps the son develop the ability to articulate his thoughts and balance his emotions. Thereby, he develops self-control in the classroom and social settings.
Respects women: A close relationship with the mother will help a boy appreciate her role in his life and her contribution to the family. He will learn to respect women in general because he is less likely to have superiority issues with his female counterparts.
Less risky behavior: Boys who are close to their mothers involved in less-risky behavior. A positive mother-son relationship reduces the peer pressure influence. A study (2) reveals that the boy’s mother has a major influence in his attitude toward alcohol, drugs, and sex.
Likely to become successful: A mother/ father, who is involved in her son’s education and life, helps him become successful professionally and personally. She becomes his friend, guide, philosopher, and shows him the path to success.