Definition of Who I am

In the small town of Bulacan, my father and mother built our family. My mom works as a housemaid while my father works as a pandesal vendor. Five years after they lived together, the evening of September 11, 1999, my loud cry covered the whole room of the hospital. My grandmother named me "Ma. Fernanda" My grandmother told my parents that I should name after Ferdinand Marcos. After a year, my younger brother was born and named Jhon Jefferson. We are close to each other, and since we are a child, we have already experienced various hardships in our life. We experienced having no electricity, no water supply, no proper comfort room, and we even tried using salt and oil as our viand. If my brain serves me right, I was seven years old when my father got into an accident. He's riding a bike that he used to sell our pandesal when a tricycle drive by a man who was under the influence of alcohol bumped my father's bike. Fortunately, the tricycle driver ran him to the hospital, and my father only had minor injuries.

My parents decided to travel here to Mariveles, Bataan, hoping to change our lives. Fortunately, my mother found a job as a vegetable vendor and my father as a security guard. It doesn't make us rich but, at least, it is not the same as before. Until now, in 2022, we are still residing here in Bataan. I'm already graduating student of Bachelor of Science in Social Work at Don Honorio Ventura State University Porac Campus. I'm not an intellectual student, but I'm afraid of failure; that's why I'm still surviving in college life.

I'm the type of person who is easy to get along with; maybe that's one of the reasons I'm appointed as the Class Mayor of our section. I'm also a CEO, CEO of collecting hobbies, and immediately lost interest in it. The year after the pandemic started, I bought a sewing machine to try altering clothes; guess what? All the clothes that I altered were used as rugs. I easily accepted that sewing was not for me. Do you want to guess what I did next? You are right, I bought materials for crochet, and in less than two weeks, I gave all the materials to my cousin because I couldn't do it. Enough with my hobbies, let's talk about my talent, DONE. We don't have anything to talk to because I'm not blessed with any talent. Oh! I can watch Korean dramas until 6 am, is that a talent? I don't have any hobbies or talents. I'm not also the attractive type of girl based on the shit standards set by society. In a nutshell, I'm nothing special; I'm just a human being trying to survive in everyday life.

Let's talk about my pet peeves and my favourite characteristic of a person. Pet peeves, when someone asks me a particular thing numerous times, I can explain it twice, thrice, but make sure that you have an acceptable reason but, if you're not listening intendedly, that's the time that I get mad. Another is I hate answering unannounced calls. I don't know, but a person should head up before calling someone unless it's an emergency. Next is, I hate a person who invalidates someone's emotions. “Wag ka nang malungkot, dapat masaya lang” “Wag ka nang malungkot mas grabe pa nga pinagdaanan ko dyan e” please, if you’re that kind of person, then change, because I assure that kind of advises were not helpful at all, you’re just adding the burden of a person. I have a lot of pet peeves, but I don't want negativity to dominate my autobiography, so let's proceed to my favourite characteristics of a person. First, a humble person, I can quickly identify if the person is bragging or just confident. A humble person does not flaunt everything about them; they do not think that they are superior; for them, everyone is just equal. Next is a person who has self-control. I admire them a lot because it's not hard for them to avoid distractions, and everything that they put their mind to will be finished in just a short time. Last is a person who easily compliments others.

Do you want to know my personality red flag and green flags? One of my positive traits or green flags is accepting constructive criticisms when someone corrects my grammar or attitudes. I consider it a helpful remark and not an insult, and I make sure that I will use it to develop my character or personality. I love it when someone nicely outsmarts me. Another is I think I'm pretty socially intelligent because I can converse with anyone, and I can easily start a conversation. The third is I don't invalidate someone's opinion and emotion. When it comes to group activity, all opinions are valid and matter. I'm also teachable, reliable, and cute, just kidding. Here are the negative traits or red flags that I'm not proud of, but I still acknowledge them. First is, I'm always late. Since then, I have found it difficult to wake up in the morning. When the university implemented an online class, the lazy spirit inside me got stronger, and I used to wake up at 11 am. Second, my attention span is so short. I admit that I just learned a few things in our online class for two years that's why I'm not sure if I will pass the upcoming board exam. But I'm currently working on the negative traits that I stated above. It doesn't mean that I admitted it, then I will not do anything about it, no! we should seek character development.

Regarding my short attention span, since the online class started, it's difficult for me to focus solely on the discussion because of many factors. The first is an unstable internet connection; it is hard when your instructor states essential information and cannot hear it clearly. I also missed or turned in some activities late because of a slow internet connection. The second is an inconducive environment for learning. I'm residing in a small compound near the road, and all you can hear is a sound coming from the vehicles and a loud voice from my neighbors. Last is lack of interaction; based on my observation, I retain the information longer when interacting with my classmates and instructors, but if I'm receiving information through listening in a video or audio, it will just retain for a short period.

How about my dreams for myself? I'm into Korean culture, movies, variety shows, and foods. It is one of my goals to travel to Korea. I'm amazed at how Koreans preserved their cultures, particularly their respect for their ancestors and parents. I also want to try their foods, especially beef tartare, kimbap, beef bulgogi, bossam (combination of oyster, kimchi, and boiled pork). Since I'm a fan of Korean dramas, I badly want to take pictures in some of their shooting locations. Another is their technology; Korea is one of the countries with advanced technology. In addition, I want to meet a handsome Oppa and get married, just kidding.

How about my family? Every eldest child born in a low-income family's goal is to give their parents a comfortable life, and it's also the same for me. We currently reside in a boarding house and pay 2000 pesos a month. Before, when my father was still working, it was easy for us to support our needs, but when he got blind in 2019, everything changed. My mother became the breadwinner of our family. All day, she's working as a vegetable vendor to provide our daily expenses, and it's harder to earn these days because of a pandemic. Aside from financial aspects, my father's health is also one of our problems. It started in 2019 when he slowly lost his eyesight. In 2021 his condition worsened, and he lost his capability to see. We're glad that an institution in Pampanga offered us a free operation, but my father needs to undergo various medical clearances before the operation. It requires a huge amount of money; that's why his operation is not possible until now. I agree that it's definitely challenging to be poor regarding health and education, but I want to be as optimistic as possible. I'll use all the hardships we've experienced to work hard and ascertain that we will experience a comfortable life someday.

I'm just a simple human being, but, I'm the main character of my own life.