Do you believe that there are no perfect marriage? That even if you planned it perfectly it end up not the same way you thought about it.
Our thinking about marriage is the next step or journey after the boyfriend and girlfriend relationship wherein you can enjoy each others company with a blessing and also legally. You can enjoy each other in all aspects whether in bed or even in small talks or deep conversation. Newly wed couples are so excited to enter this new journey of thier life because they can now do what we want but marriage is not all about that. Marraige is not easy and it's not always fun.
Many young couples think that a fabulous wedding will make a happy ending. I am not referring to all as I know each of us has different perception about wedding. I mean some of us wants a practical one because they know that the true marriage will begin after the ceremony but because many of us wants a memorable wedding some of us choose a fabulous one but it's can't secure the marriage as I said above.
What is marriage?
Sometimes admitting that you are wrong even if you are right is a part of marriage. Can you visualize the scenario? Is like if couples insisted that they are both right, who's the one who will admit who is wrong? If you read my previous articles about misunderstanding , me and my husband insisted that we are both right resulting of not understanding each other and leads to fight. Sometimes you can let your spouse be right to avoid arguments. Who's with me ✌️
In marriage you will see the reality that you didn't see in social media. I mean you are looking forward for a perfect wife who has the beauty like before but when you get married there are times the your expectation won't happened and you'll be amazed the you accepted your partner without any expectations. I will make an example , I almost forgot to take good care of my self because of doing household chores and look after the kids. I gain weight , I am not look so we'll compares back then. But my husband accepted it and likewise.
Making a fight is just making a fight. I mean fight is normal on couples but it should be remain as that and not will be the reason of break up or separation matters. We were always like this but even if we were fighting we never open or say a word about break up or separation. I swear , even if I am in intense anger I can't say that.
When you have a visitor , you are acting so good and perfectly especially if your friends or colleagues of your husband or wife were there. Did you visualize the scenario? Filipinos are hospitable we all know that and it's not a plastic manners ha. You can also observed it in other married couple. Example your parents.
Marriage also means forever whether you like it or not.
Marriage also means that...
No matter how tired you are , you always have someone who will help you and love you no matter what. You are together with the household chores and making money. You are tandem and partner in everything.
When you are annoyed to a person , there's also someone who hated that person for the same reason. This is not literally angry as in but in some reason you spouse support you that way she/he can.
When you terminated on your job or betrayed by your friend, there is someone who will offer your shoulder to you and willing to fight for you. We experienced this during lockdown and I must say I never leave him and say a hurtful words when he has no job.
Marriage is not all about sharing every part of the house. Marriage is all about being there when your partner has facing something. A person that can be your best friend. A person who can hear you. A shoulder to lean on and a helping hands when you need to.
Who Should Marry?
If you look in the eyes of your love and you know that you will not bat the eye of your partner when there's a problem occured then you can marry someone. If you think that sharing the same bed or a toothbrush is not so cool like going to the bar or hanging out with friends , then think twice of getting married. Marriage are for two people. A two people who are ready to accept and embrace the strength and weakness of thier partners. If you are shy to show your big belly or anything that you are ashamed on or you relatives that are so humiliating or worrying about that you can have someone to asked in every decision you will make, well marriage does not make sense.
Who Should Not Marry?
It requires 100 percent love when you want to invest in what we called marriage. You need also to accept that your spouse and you will be 50/50 in all the thing you do and decision to make. If you are not ready for that then maybe marriage is not for you.
Source: Psychology Today
Closing thoughts
But nowadays , marriage is not sacred at all. Sometimes when the girl got pregnant then the marriage happened. When you want to be rich then you marry a rich guy. When you want to escape and leave you responsibility then you choose to get married even if you are not yet ready. I am also guilty with this, we got married because I got pregnant but there's no regret after to choose that thing. We both know that we will have a happy marriage because like what I said on my previous article love is not all about emotions. It's all about choice and decision. If you will continuously choose your spouse and be together forever.