Why parents are strict or overprotective?

Being a parent was a very big role that will influenced ,mold with a person from toddler to adulthood.Their is no perfect parent everyone has a their own reasons why they are strict or overprotective.We need to understand the causes why my parents are like that,and how did it affects with our children?

Since i was in highschool my parents was very strick,my father says,that he don't want me to have a boyfriend while studying because if i will not cooperate he will let me stop from school.Of course it makes me feel uncomfortable being controlled.

Here are other things that parents would say:

• When the sun goes down you should be here in the house already.

• You should not wear shorts or sexy dress.

Parents may be strict because of the mistakes they had in the past,and they don't want it to happen with you.There are some parents that were raised strictly so they continue the trend.They feel or believe that their parents raised them this way because they wanted the trend to pass on.But most parents are strict because they care for their children .

But sometimes the parent get overboard with their kids ,and it has a great impact with the children.

There is a true story which a girl who was 14 years old share on what did she do to show her rebellion with her parents.She engage on premarital sex at the age of 14,and got miscarriage that her parents didn't know.She admit that she was not happy when she commit a mistakes,she had 10 sex partners at the very young age.What she always say,that she felt that my parents don't let her do the things that she want.

This was a very sad reality but it really happens ,but both parents and children should know and understand each other to have a win- win solution.

A psychologist explained why did parents are overprotective.

• Children should understand that your parents loved you whatever it is,believe it or not they loved you.

• Parents have the tendency to control their children when they think that you are not responsible enough to handle a situation. Like when the daughter see the kitchen when there are a lot of kitchen utensils that needs to be washed but you don't do it on your own,the parent think that you did not cooperate so you are not mature enough,that's the time that a parent would yell and take control.

• When parents think that their children are selfish,self -centered and have tantrums like toddlers they intervened and take control.

• But when children are truly responsible ,and having an initiative ,or mature enough they are willing to back you up.

When talking about how to discipline the children there is a suggestion from a psychologist that'Parents should implement Rules with Relationship to their kids because Implementing Rules without Relationship causes rebellion.

And its really true,here are the things that kids don't want that their parents do.

• They don't want that their parents will always their to the rescue.

• They don't want their parents to treat them like a baby even they are already young.

Like for example the daughter failed on a test,so when the parent know they go to school and yelled with the teachers.So the daughter feel ashamed their classmates and get bullied.It means that,parents should let the kids encounter failures so that they will learn from their mistakes.

Another situation for this is ,the kids are having an assignment,so the father told the kids to answer it before bed time but the kids played online games so they forgot the test,because of that they had a failed score.So they suffer the consequence from being not cooperative with their parents.

A strick parent is more consider on behavior rather than the heart of the child.Parents have big affect to us from the food we eat,the show we like to see,the social media and all the formation of being a person.

Study show that childrens who have a strict parents have high levels of depression,and less satisfaction in life.

This parents wants to help their kids but it doesn't seem to help them at all.It affect the total brain development,social life and even the immune system.Strict parenting doesnt have a good effect.Children of strict parents tend to be rebellious,others are involved in smoking,drinking and drug abuse.

THINGS THAT PARENTS SHOULD NEED TO CONSIDER

• Parents should not hold back the dreams of their children.

  The children should have a choice on their own,of course parents can suggest that you want them to be a doctor but what they want is fine arts,parents should realize what makes the kids happy with their career.

• Parents should not put a lot of pressure with their children

  Like ,you want your kids to have a number one grades after exam.It cause them to become stressed if we put them a lot of expectations.

• Parents should emotionally available to their children.

  This is when they have a special day,like recognition awards or having a final game with basketball,and during this christmas time.,decorate your house so you can create good memories with your children.

• Parents should help their children overcome their problem.

• Parents should not scold their children often

  What does this mean?It means that punishments should be done in the things that really matters,its not included with a broken glass,or spilled glass of water.Punishments for bad grades are harmful to the kids too it makes them having low self esteem, it kill the desire for learning.

Obviously nobody's perfect ,parenting was a difficult task at all.

For all the kids,we should remember that our parents loved us so much,whoever they are, you may not understand for now but when you got married you will really understand why my parents are like this?

Its like a kid who was walking on a mountain when their parents see that the kid was about to fell on a clift the parents ran towards him to rescue the kids.Overprotective parents has a reason ,we should understand both sides because we don't know the upbringing of our parents ,maybe it has a great effect on why they are strict to us.

One thing also,parents should teach their children by modelling,for example.Always show gratitude to the people and respect so that the kids will learn too.And your children will say,my father was like that a good example.Their behavior was learned from home so ,our home should be a home of good moral values so that children will see and learned until they get older and have family they can passed it to the next generation.

To all the parents we should understand that our children is a blessing to us we do not owned them,we are like a steward to our kids,we are responsible to teach ,to discipline but not to make them miserable.

Above all parents should build a Relationship with Rules to their children, the bottom of this is love,let them know that you loved them so that both parents and children can be a best friends that both cherish forever.

Thanks for reading!

God bless!