Learn to live independently

It's 4:24 that I have started to write this article,and so I came up to this topic because it's my highlight of the day and a great lesson for me and my family too.

If our children will already married,it's advisable that they will leave separately from their parents and lived together as one family.But,sometimes it happens that they just also lived beside their parents house,just like us,we're living in one lot,which owned by my parents.It's me and my three brothers also lived with us but we're in different houses.Everytime there was a problem we share together and helping each other,we also share foods and other things that we can.

I think the disadvantage is that,everytime we had a problem in our respective family,our parents will also heard it,and there's always a tendency for them to intervene when there's a couple who are quarreled or someone is crying in the next house.There just one time that one of my brother and his wife got quarreled and my mama have decided to return the wife's clothes to her parents.

Actually,that's so sad.It makes me cry while I talk to the wife's mom. My mama have decided in behalf of my brother because she was thinking that they may end up in physical abuse if the wife will come back home. My sis-in law doesn't return home for almost a month but our family have experienced sleepless nights and trouble everyday that we saw their daughter crying without a mom.

Until one day, we just noticed that they are chatting again and they met at night.My mom didn't want that his wife will return to the house.That's why my brother decided to built a home in his wife residence.My mama felt sad when she knew it,I know that she's hut and she's gonna missed her granddaughter but she just agree with the plan.

As a parent,I have learned that when our children are already married,they must learned to become :

INDEPENDENT

As they separate from their parents custody when they get married,it's already becoming an independent.Not just during marriage life, but also when children have already reached the age of maturity.There were times that our children may decide on their owned,and as a parents sometimes they can't accept it.That's what happened to my family.And me to, when we decided to live far from our family, they are worried and often telling us to return home which gave us trouble.

On the other hand, this usually happened when our parents are mindful about us all the time.I don't feel mad about it because I know that they just care for me,and they can't accept that I will believing away from them.Those feeling that they had for me before ,had happened again when my brother was married.I and my family are now living again with my parents land, but our brother is about to live here when they finished to built their home.

LIVE ON THEIR OWN

That is one of the main purpose why my brother have to live away from our parents because they want to live on their own.And for me, its a good decision for them,since he was the youngest of our siblings, this is gonna be his first time to live in a distant,actually, it's not that far from us.They will be mature once they can live independtly,so,I think it will helped him and his wife.

THEY CAN MAKE THE RELATIONSHIP BETTER

When nobody can interfere a couple, they way they do,they can create more time together,bond together and have a privacy.This too is one way to cultivate a strong relationship as a family, the way they raised their kids and how they will disciplined them and teach them in a proper way,where no one would interrupt them on how their life must go on.

THEY CAN LEARN TO DEPEND EACH OTHER

As young couples,there's a tendency that they will rely with their parents, but when they live independently, they can learned to depend with each other in terms with decision making, security, budgeting,care, and providing the needs of the family accordng to their source of living.

When children needs to live separately, as parents what can we do;

ASSIST

In times of need, or some important things that they need o be done, we can extend helped like watching over the kids or taking care of their pets while they are away.I'm glad that when my children were sick,my parents we're always there to give me advice and teaches me what to do when I was confused.

PRAY FOR THEM

I always believe in the power of prayer in the family to be strong and grow.God will serve as a mediator in their hearts that can supressed the negative emotions that will sprout as they discover diferences with each other.

ENCOURAGE THEM TO BE FAITHFUL

One thinthat I admire with my parents is that, they are faithful with ther marriage as they get older.This is one thing that parents can do for their children,instead of advising them to separate when they get mad dwith each other.

There are some single people who are already independent even if they are not yet married,and I'm glad to see them.

But once, we are very attached with our family, that's one thing that we gonna miss or hard to give up when we got married.The closeness andthe bonding with your parents inside the house.

Living independently, with a married couple was a good step for me.Being married is another level of maturity that we can experience in our life, and it's a good journey once we already into it.

Being independent is to live free.

This is all I can wite for today.

Regards to all of you,I'm glad to read your comments below.

Thank you.