At first, akala ko kaya kong tiisin at magpaka-strong. But the more that I tried to cover up the pain, the anger and the negativity I'm feeling, the more na kinakain ng kalungkutan at sakit ang sarili ko.
There was a time na feeling ko wala na akong kakampi, I doubted even my husband! Sobrang quiet ng Lord that time. My heart is shouting with agony! I'm questioning God, do I deserve to be treated and misjudged? All I want to do is to serve Him with all my heart and this is what I got?!
Andaming tanong at sama ng loob, I felt a total darkness in front of me. I just want to die.
Then suddenly, one night when everyone's sleeping, God told me this, "ANAK, DI BA SABI KO SAYO I WILL NEVER LEAVE YOU NOR FORSAKE YOU, NAKALIMUTAN MO NA BA?."
And that moment, sobrang humagulgol ako sa Lord, and there I was realized, andyan pa Siya, He is waiting na magpatulong ako sa Kanya at aminin kong hindi ko kaya. And the biggest realization is, binigay Niya yung asawa ko para ipanalangin at suportahan ako.
I not only seek God, I also seek professional advice.
And I must say, that God indeed, never leave nor forsake me.
Kapatid, if you are feeling hopeless and darkness in front of you, remember the LIGHT. Remember Jesus. Kung lahat pakiramdam natin, iniwan tayo, Siya never Niyang gagawin yun. Hinihintay Niya lang tayong magpasaklolo sa Kanya as we drowning emotionally and physically, He was there to save us.
It's always our choice to stay in the darkness or let God win the battle for us.
And that is true. He will never abandon us. We actually most of the time abandons Him. kapit lng dear.