"Advantages and Disadvantages living with parents when you are already married"

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Avatar for Venus1996
2 years ago

February 23, 2022

#Article5

Disclaimer: This article is just based on my personal experiences and I don't have any attention to degrading, disrespecting, or insulting my parent or any parents in this world.

Our parents played a so important role in our life, we are not here if we don't have them. They are our providers, they nurture us, they take care of our basic needs, such as food, clothing, shelter, as well as give us love, attention, acceptance, and time.

They also give us directions, impose rules and regulations, discipline us, set limits, and most important teach us values.

Our parents served us a strong foundation and support in any situations we may encounter in life. They are also our best advisers and our best teachers.

In my case, I have two sets of mom and dad. My biological parents and my second parents, since I was 2 years old I am already living with my second parents. My second mom is my biological father's sister, my father's sister is not blessed to have a child that's why they decided to take me and treat me as their child.

My second parents provided me with all that I need from food, shelter, and many more.

But what are the advantages and disadvantages of having two sets of parents?

I am so blessed that I have two sets of parents and that is the advantage but not all time you experience or feel the advantages, it should be balanced. The disadvantages that I experience or feel having two sets of parents are having difficulties which parents' rules I will obey, different ways of on how they discipline, and different standards to obtain.

But I don't look at my disadvantages as discouragement instead I turned them into my encouragement so that I will still do my best to make them or reach them.

When the day that becomes also a parent, I understand their purposes. The way of their parenthood makes me ready and makes me understand how hard to become a parent and you cannot know and understand it if you didn't become one.

It's hard to become a parent to tell you frankly, you need to be strong, firm, responsible because parenting is not just about getting the child to sleep, feeding the child when she/he is feeling hungry, or changing her/his diaper it is about full lifetime responsibility.

The hard part when you become a parent is the disciplining stage for your child especially when you live with your parents.

Grandparents have this extra love for their grandchildren that is what I've discovered or observed. They always say yes to whatever their grandchildren want to or what they want to do, they also interrupt you will you give a lesson to your child/ren and that's is the disadvantages of being with or living with your parents. You cannot own your child because they are always there to save their grandchild/ren.

Disciplining with your child is not just the only disadvantage you may experience or feel when you are living with your parents when you are already married and have your family. You can also experience the following;

  • You will not grow as an individual or as a partner, because you are still dependent on the head of the family. You have no power of handling your family.

  • You have to live according to your parent's rules.

  • Your parents treat you like a child.

  • Sometimes your parent will dictate what you should do.

  • Your children are spoiled by their grandparents.


But before you judge me or blame me that experiencing those things, let me tell you the reason. I am living with my second parents because they don't have a helping hand to do the household chores and handle our mini-farm, also I prefer living here because my business is just located in front of the house, they don't want us to go far or work another profession that's why they want us to live with them first until we got both stable jobs and can make our dream house.


Living with my second parents is not just about disadvantages, it has also advantages that help us to become better parents and individuals such as;

  • They also give advice, guidance, and support, especially in my married life.

  • You can save money from renting a house.

  • You can use your money in investing or making your own business.

  • You can help your parents.

  • You have company around you that you can trust.

  • You have an extra hand in caring for your child/ren.

  • You can spend precious time with your parents and you can take care of them back.

That's why there is nothing like home. I am so thankful that I have and blessed with these kinds of parents.

Before I ended my article I want to close this with this quotations;


Thank you for reading my article and I hope you enjoy and learn some lesson.

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2 years ago

Comments

I'm not married yet but I understand for things like this because of my experience when I saw my sister who was married and still living with us, mental stress is always food every day because my parents always advised my brother to always try to work and have to live independently with his family meaning he must be able to looking for more capital or finances to take care of his family because my parents don't want to see their grandchildren not receive a decent life. I can understand how much pressure my parents put on my brother because his goal was for his family to live in prosperity. Indeed, living with parents when you are married has mental pressure so you have to be mentally strong to accept it because every action you take is not like an unmarried child. but always remember that the goal of parents is good for the future of the family. keep holding on because your parents love you

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2 years ago

Thank you so much for that word of encouragement. That's true, you must be open-minded if you live with your parents because of some circumstances that you may experience. That's why I and my husband invest to have this business of ours to sustain the needs of my two kids and give them the life that they deserve.

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2 years ago

I can relate to this,I'm living with my parents in the family ,it's really tiring and I always watch out my own movement,and I cant sleep in my preferred time..My parents will interfere on how is discipline my children before but I always told them to let us do our part as a parent.

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2 years ago

In the part of disciplining stage that's true, it's so hard to discipline because they always interfere with the way we discipline our child/ren.

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2 years ago

There are disadvantages if youll live in your relatives even though you have own family, if we lived in our parents house there will be lots of things to be heard but some are kind that they support you in times of emotional or financial problems. However there are parents treating their children who got a family still immature specially those young couples that accidentally made a mistake.

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2 years ago

That's indeed true.

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2 years ago

As our elders put it, you'll understand parents more when you become a parent yourself. :) In your case, you're blessed to have two sets of parents to turn to for advice and help! Though for sure there will be inevitable friction, especially in decision making.

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2 years ago

That's true, we cannot avoid that scenario sometimes but they also respect every decision I make for my family.

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2 years ago

Having two mothers made you lucky. Others don't have even one for they were abandoned by their parents. Be grateful enough.

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2 years ago

I am grateful for that ma'am. That's why I refer to being near to them for the reason that I want to help them and I can update their status easily.

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2 years ago