Unsolve Feelings
it was cloudy weather when I woke up. it was 6 am and I'm packing up my things because I'm preparing for 3-4 hours of travel. Before I leave I ate my favorite breakfast with my favorite coffee. I'm so excited today because I will go to my boyfriend's house and I will be surprising him for our anniversary and he didn't know that I will go there.
before that, I went for shopping to buy some surprise gifts for him. I know what he likes so I bought his favorite food. It took me an hour to pay for the food and some stuff because of the long line at the counter. after that, I went to the terminal station and it will be long hours of travel.
while I'm on my way there I was thinking about him while looking out the window and watching the scenery. I'm wondering what will be his reaction when he saw me. actually, this is my first time after a couple of months to see him again. I missed him so much...
I finally arrived after a couple of hours. He was not there and his mom told me that he went to his friend and he will be probably back after lunch. so I wait for him for a couple of hours again. I fell asleep while waiting and someone was tapping on my cheek and it was him.
I get up while scratching the back of my neck and I smiled at him. how are you? I said. I'm fine! what are you doing here? he said. I look at him for a second and I'm saying to myself (really?). I'm here to surprise you, happy anniversary!. I brought some of your favorite food, here!
I feel like he was not happy that I was here. we don't do much and he was just on his phone playing some games. I don't know what to do at that time and I was just sitting in the corner. I thought he will be happy when I surprise him but no.
After a while, I told him to stop playing some games and talk to me for a while. Then he said that stop talking because he was focusing on his game. I wait for him while he was playing and I talk to him again like a child and he yelled at me.
What are you doing? can you just behave for a moment. can't you see that I'm playing?
He raises his voice with a mad face. Then he said, you should not go here. you are just wasting your time.
I was shocked and my world stops for a second. I pack my things up and decided to go home even if it was too early. His mom told me what happen but I refuse to answer and I said goodbye.
It was painful, It seems like he doesn't have feelings for me. While I'm on the bus, I was crying silently. I don't know what to do, should I talk to him or just leave it like that?
I went home early with pain in my heart. We didn't break up but it feels like we did. I was hoping for a happy moment but instead, I ended up with mess and pain.
I called him again late at night because I know he is still awake and he decline my call so many times. I stopped calling him and I just went to bed while crying.