I cannot pursue you
Yet;
And I may never do.
I'm starting to like you a lot more than I expected.
I admire your beauty, your positive outlook on life, your kindness, and your positive energy that draws everyone closer.
But it is your faith that I admire the most about you. How confidently you speak it.
I am grateful that you let me get to know you and that you allowed our friendship to grow and deepen. You've been so at ease with me. You said the things I'm afraid to say and accept in myself. You are a source of comfort to me when I am down. A bad, cloudy day can be transformed into one filled with golden sunshine.
You also rant about tidbits of your life, and you know how much I enjoy hearing all of your stories. Your heartbreaks, your thoughts, your grudges, and your disappointments. I'm humbled by your trust, which I can't even give to myself.
You let me into your life, and I let you into mine.
And as I got to know you better, I noticed things that were a sight for sore eyes. I was able to figure out what you were hiding. Things that are hidden in your heart's deepest cellars. I saw your flaws, your imperfections, your doubts, your fears, your disappointments, your bad attitude, your obstinacy.
These, however, did not deter me. It didn't bother me in the least. These are the things that heightened my emotions. All of your positives and negatives, good and bad, big and small things.
But I'm not going to give you false hope.
I'm thinking about confessing and pursuing you. I've been hoping and praying that you feel the same way. I've been fantasizing about becoming a member of your family. Each morning, I am greeted by the most beautiful scene I have ever seen.
Your smile.
But we're still a work in progress. There are a lot of things that have been set up for us to prioritize. I believe we must first prioritize the people to whom we need to devote more time, our struggles, our commitments, and, most importantly, our personal growing relationship with Him. And if He thinks it's a good idea for us to help each other in our pursuit of Him, then and only then can I say I'll pursue you.