The best way to develop emotional intelligence

Emotional intelligence is considered one of the most important factors for achieving success and gaining happiness in life in general, as it covers all dimensions of people's interactions with others, and every person aspires to achieve happiness and success in his life without having any emotional intelligence but is like trying to sail a ship in the midst of Heavy waves and harsh winds without a sail. Under this situation, you may do everything in your power to maintain your path, but there is no hope that you will achieve much progress. Here is the best way to develop your emotional intelligence:

The best way to develop emotional intelligence

Here are the best ways to develop Emotional Intelligence, which is divided into three stages: The first stage is understanding the self who you are and what are your psychological characteristics who are quick to anger or calm temper, etc. The third stage is about controlling feelings and controlling oneself How to deal with anger Sadness, frustration, etc., and the third stage is about empathy to reach the best way to deal with other people's feelings and be kind. Read also: The ten qualities of an attractive personality.

The first stage: self-understanding:

It is the ability to be aware of your emotions, thoughts, actions, behaviors, self-esteem, who you are and who you want to be.

Psychologist Robert Delts has conducted dozens of interviews with business leaders and found that each of them has an answer to three very important questions related to the emotional aspect: Who are you? What is your mission or goal in life? what do you feel now?.

If you do not know who you are and what your psychological characteristics are, do not wait for your manager, for example, to understand you, and do not expect to establish strong relationships with your colleagues, and if you do not know your message and your goal in life, do not wait to be satisfied with your work, and if you do not know your feelings, then how can you hope that your response to things is correct?

Three basic steps for self-understanding:

Sit in a quiet place and relax, grab a pen and paper, and follow these steps:

• 1) Find out what you feel badly about in your life and complete writing this sentence (What I feel bad feelings about is ...). Do not rule out anything.

• 2) Know the things about which you feel positive feelings in your life and complete the following sentence “What I feel positive feelings about in my life is .....) Do not rule out anything.

• 3) Know how you are feeling now, then complete the following sentence: “What I can learn and do to improve the things that I feel strongly about is ....).

The second stage: controlling emotions:

This method shows you how to deal with negative feelings through the development of a kind of solid confidence, the solidity of the rock, which represents the separation between success and failure in times of crisis, and the person who trusts in his success often tends to the finish line more than those who are filled with doubts about their success and with the increase in work pressure Unfortunately, we find two emotions that afflict many people, which is a feeling of exhaustion and a feeling of pressure. Sharmayn Welles, the financial advisor, believes that high emotional intelligence is a must to overcome severe stress. She says, “I found that getting out of anxiety takes twice as long as it takes to prevent anxiety before it occurs."

You can use emotional intelligence behind a stable self-confidence that acts as a buffer against negative feelings that lead to stress and fatigue. Research has revealed that the main component of trust is the awareness that you are ready for disaster and will overcome it, God willing, and this knowledge helps successful people to continue on their way, regardless of the obstacles. Sports journalist and motivation expert Alan Kelter argues that the foundation of unwavering confidence is knowing that you are ready for the worst of the odds.

Six steps to strong confidence:

• 1) Ask yourself what exactly led to the generation of negative feelings, (it may be because of the insult that the employee directed at you or when he asked you to work in excess of your original job or a man who spread rumors on you).

• 2) What are the worst consequences of the situation that caused this feeling? And try to imagine the worst that could happen.

• 3) How would I deal with the stress of the situation in the event that the worst thing happened? (Who will you turn to to provide you emotional support? How will you deal with the distress you will feel and the feeling of losing control?)

• 4) What would matters be in reality if this bad thing happened? Whatever the bitterness of pain in the beginning, what happens after the worst-case scenario: Will you die? Will you kill yourself? Will you remain shattered all your life? Or will you get up and try again? Just as you did with other challenges you have faced in your life? (If you are going to rise again, you have begun to feel confident in yourself.)

• 5) What is sufficient for me to do to mitigate the effects of the worst possibility when it occurs? Is there any way to set things right? (It might be better to list the options available.)

• 6) What can I do now to increase the chances of a positive outcome?

Now there is no reason for you to waste time worrying about the worst-case scenarios and have a chance to focus your effort on finding a preventive strategy in order to prevent this from happening.

Stage Three: Massive Empathy:

This is a primary means of emotional intelligence that enables you to establish relationships with others, and it is simply the ability to know and understand other people's attitudes, feelings, and reactions.

There is a wisdom that says: If you want to understand a person, you must first walk in his shoes. In order to succeed in your relationships with others, you have to understand how they think and how they feel and interact with them according to their thinking and feelings.

Six Steps to Massive Empathy:

• 1) Pick an issue you have with someone who provokes your feelings.

• 2) Focus on knowing the exact reasons that triggered these feelings.

• 3) Recall the image the other person was on during the situation and try to imagine the motives behind his behavior.

• 4) Change your position and put yourself in the shoes of the other person and think about the behavior that you have acted on this problem from his point of view.

• 5) Find a lesson that you can apply that leads to more positive results or increases your understanding and sympathy for the other person in the future.

• 6) In the end, review whether the way you interacted with him was correct, or did you have to change the way you interacted and interacted with him?