This fucking sucks when you were the one motivating every demotivated guy whenever they feel low and now you are the one who is fucking demotivated all the time, who thinks his life sucks, who is unable to stand on his own expectations. Who was once considered to be the one of the bests, and now he is one of the worsts in his own eyes. Who was once on the way to achieve everything and now is seeing the tragedy of losing everything... Life is unexpected - I knew, but I don’t know where it all went wrong! It sucks to be the one who got out of suicidal thoughts and now is back at that. I know I won’t end my life, but I don’t want my life either. I just want to cry my heart out, but I hate to cry... I have made myself strong enough to drink my tears, and now this hurts, this hurts so fucking much that I can’t even cry... I don’t get jealous of anyone going towards success, but yes it hurts me in way that why I am not the one getting closer to success...