How to Text a Girl Part I
This article is not about getting you more texts from girls. If it was about that, I would’ve titled it How to Have Long Text Conversations with a Girl.
It’s not about that, because I don’t think that’s what you actually want. I don’t think you actually want to be as clever as you can be in your texting. And I don’t think you actually want to make her fall in love with your texts.
I think what you actually want is to be able to get her to say YES when you ask her to meet up. So that’s what this article is about. Throughout this article, I’m going to challenge some of the most cherished conventional notions of “good texting.” If some of these challenges I toss your way make you a little uncomfortable, that’s good. What I want you to do when that happens is to take the empiricist’s mindset and say “Okay, let me try it out.”
I have approached thousands of women. I went on hundreds of dates. I whisked girls off to bed, and I took some of them as girlfriends. And I got good.
To begin our article, I want to introduce you to four kinds of texters. Three of these texters don’t fully respect the medium (texting) as a message (quick, simple, and logistical). The fourth one does – and he gets the best results. Much of this article will be about why, and the rest of it will be about how to text girls like he does. Before we get to that kind of texter, first I want to tell you about the three far more common forms of texters on the dating market. These I’ve affectionately dubbed Clueless Boring Questions Guy, Endless Conversations Guy, and Really, Incredibly Witty and Interesting Guy.
Clueless Boring Questions Guy
To women, the most diabolically annoying texter is the Clueless Boring Questions Guy, hereafter abbreviated as CBQG. CBQG has zero clue how to text girls, what girls would like to see in a text message, or even what girls are like most of the time in general, period. At no time has CBQG ever sat down and asked himself:
“If I was a girl, how would I respond to a message like this?”
He immediately assumes that all women are like him – lonely and without many options. Thus, they should be thrilled to get texts from him, even if they’re all just clueless boring questions like:
“What’s up?”
“How’s it going?”
“How was your weekend?”
“What are you doing?”
CBQG assumes that girls must love getting texts like this from him. After all, he’d love getting texts like this from girls. So of course it must go both ways. CBQG often becomes frustrated when girls don’t answer his questions. He wonders why he doesn’t get replies. He thinks girls are difficult to understand and make things needlessly complicated.
At no point does CBQG sit down and think to himself: “Lame guys inundate most girls all day with lame requests. Most guys text, write, and say to girls the same lame things all the time. Oh no! If I send girls lame texts, they’ll assume I’m lame, too!”
This never occurs to him, because CBQG knows himself so well that he knows that he’s not lame. He assumes that everyone else must know this, too... even if he behaves the same way that other men, who actually are lame, do.
CBQG believes that it’s women’s responsibility to recognize his inner awesomeness. Girls must fight through the lameness he exhibits on the outside to discover his awesomeness inside. CBQG spends many nights alone, angry, hurt, and confused by how the world can be so confusing and so cold.