I wish I could go back

We all have different shades we reveal to every person we meet. You may have a different opinion about this but this is how I see things. I can be any kind of friend. It all depends on the people I meet and the kind of relationship that exists between us, the kind of energy or vibes that's given too. The same thing goes in a relationship. We bring out either the best part of people or the ugly part of people depending on our input, vibe, or energy. 

To some persons I've met, they would describe me as quiet, calm, shy, reserved, respectful. 

Some would describe me as someone who talks, someone crazy, funny. The truth is they're all right. This is because however they see me as, is as a result of the nature of my relationship with them and the energy they give. 

For instance, while I was an apprentice, my tutor was my age grade but she has married already with a child. At the early stage, it was just all about work and work only. So I had so much respect and I was so loyal and a humble servant. Then along the line, work aside, we were having several discussions because she loves to gist so most times when we travel for jobs she would have something to gist me about and I would just listen without having anything to say. I was not still feeling very free with her because my relationship with her started based on me trying to learn something from her so I call her ma. I never felt free with her also because I already placed her on a higher level so I had so much respect for her. 

I've also had people I've met and within 3 days of meeting and knowing me, they already know me to be a funny, laughing jackass, and someone who talks. So it all depends on the energy and vibes brought to the table. Most times it takes time for me to reveal myself as well. 

At the place I work, everyone there is free and the kind of vibes and energy I get from them gave room for me to reveal that part of me that's free, laughs a lot, and talks too. And my job being a media job needs someone who's very lively so I had to bring that part of me to the table. 

So that being said, I want to talk about childhood. At some point in our childhood, there must have been a time where he wished we were grown and bigger so we could do what we want to. For someone like me who liked to lick milk, but wasn't given that privilege to, I had that as my priority that when I grow up and start earning my own money, I would buy milk and be licking in my house. This was because my mum would always not let me have a spoon nor would our house help. I'm sure we all got to that point where we wished we were grown so we could be free to do whatever we want.

Growing up and seeing how life is, those things we thought we would be able to do when we grow up, we no longer have that zeal because we discover that life is more than what we saw it to be as a child. I never knew how serious adulthood was until now and with each passing day, life becomes tough and serious. And it's sometimes scary because I just wish I could just put a pause to time and have a break but as they say, time waits for no one. I envy little children these days because I wish I could just go back to those times when the world was ours, we had no worries, everything was taken care of by our parents or guardians, those moments where we laughed hard and played so much like we own the world. 

On Friday I was returning from work, I noticed the estate where our office was located had a playground. There was a swing and tennis board. I've never noticed it all this while so my colleague I was walking with pointed at it and we quickly rushed because the both of us showed interest not minding our age 😂. I needed to feel like a child again because a lot has been happening and I don't think I'm so much ready for this adulthood😂 it's sincerely not for me because I love to play. Life is gradually becoming serious after I graduated. So while enjoying the swing, I forgot about all my worries and I guess she did too. We both laughed and discussed our experiences with a swing in primary school. We took pictures and made a video before we stopped and headed home. At that point we stopped I felt a bit relieved, happy, and refreshed while we headed for home. Sometimes we just need to put aside all seriousness, all our worries and have a little fun even at those times life has hit us hard. 

As my friend would always say “nothing Dey this life”. In as much as life could be tough sometimes, it’s better to follow life one step at a time, softly. If you rush it or use all seriousness to follow it up, it will choke you.

Thank you for reading till the end 

#loveandlight