Love or Neglect

As soon as I got on the bus, I started looking for my seat. The number two seat from the back is mine. As soon as I went to the seat, I was startled. Because my ex is sitting there. The headphones are humming in my ears.

After 4 long years, I can't understand exactly how it feels to see him. I gave him a dry cough. But no, he is not looking at me. He is busy in his world. Seeing him, those pride awoke again. It feels very uncomfortable to sit next to him. Still, there is nothing to do.

As soon as he sat next to her, he started moving. Surprisingly, he looked at me and did not blink at all. It was as if he had cold eyes. I doubt if he has any feelings at all.

He looked at me for a moment and put the headphones on his ears again. He didn't close his eyes anymore. He kept looking out of the window. He was looking at something in his mind. He looked very strange. As if without chaos.

I don't like to be ignored like that. He is pretending not to see. I can't call him anymore.

"Form"

This time he was startled. He got up and looked at me.

"You lost the right to say the form a long time ago. You no longer have the right to call this name."

I got in trouble for a moment when I heard Rupa's words. Rupa's words hit me like an arrow in my chest.

"How are you?"

"As you can see." Roop said.

Seeing him, it is clear that he is not interested in talking to me at all. But I can't help but talk to him. I don't understand why this is happening to me. Still, I managed. I took out the headphones from my bag and started listening to music.

Those old memories floated away as soon as I closed my eyes. Roop and I lived in the same building as Chittagong. We became good friends because we were the same age. I went to the same school. The bonding between our families was very good. Everything was going very well.

When we woke up in class 10. Then suddenly it was as if a different feeling was working towards him. One day I proposed to him without understanding anything. Our love continues very well. It is called childhood love.

This is how college is passed. It is as if one cannot walk without another. Then comes varsity time. I get a chance in Dhaka. R and Chittagong. The girl says her parents will not let her go.

Since I got a chance in Dhaka, my father also transferred the job to Dhaka. The whole family shifted to Dhaka.

The day she came, she was in tears. She cried holding me for five hours. Still talking about that day. How did I handle that madness.

I heard if it is hidden from the eyes or hidden from the mind. But I didn't believe it then. The first year goes very well. I used to visit Rup once a month. But since the end of the first year, something has changed in me.

Roop slowly started to feel very annoyed. He started to feel disgusted as if he cared so much about giving her phone.

Gradually I stopped communicating with him. But his madness did not abate. Once he came to my house and wore it. I sent him to Chittagong with great difficulty.

My annoyance level increased so much that none of it would have tolerated me. In this way, day after day goes by. Two years pass to neglect him. One time I see that he becomes silent. He doesn't call me anymore. He doesn't do madness for me. Then I continue to miss these things.

But I did not realize how late I was. I went to him. I begged him a lot but he did not come back to me. My thousands of cries could not melt his mind. He was adamant in his decision. And anyway he will not come back to me. I gave him more trouble. I gave up for a while. It took 4 years.

It's hard to think of all this. Too much trouble. I called Rup again.

Roop looked at me again.

"I can't be forgiven."?

Roop just smiled a little on the surface of my words. No answer.

You're smiling! Did I say something funny?

"Albad, you said funny things. I'm laughing a lot when I hear your words."

And how much will you punish me?

"What will happen to the fact that you punished me without guilt? Was it my fault that I loved you so much? I dreamed of you?"

When I heard Rup's words, I became silent again. What was really his fault that I did so badly to him!

"Look, a lot of time has passed. There's no point in talking about old things. You've moved on in your life and I'm in my life."

If I say I haven't been able to move on yet. I still want you.

Rup smiled,

"It's not your problem. I'm very happy in my life. Please turn off your chatter. I'm very upset."

I looked at Rupa in amazement. He closed his eyes. A man has changed so much. Rupa has never been so difficult. And today he has become even more difficult. Well, does Rupa no longer love me? Does he have any feelings for me? Chin Chin is hurting at the thought.

There was no more talk in the whole journey. The bus ran to its destination. The whole road I was looking at the form. My mind has become very brazen. We arrived very early in the morning.

I got off the bus. Rupa also got behind me. But what a strange thing he got off the bus and started walking straight. Bye didn't say anything. I ran to him.

Will Roop sit with me on the bank of the river? I know you don't want to. Still, last time I want something from you.

The look stopped. He looked at me and shook his head. I understood that he has consent. I was happy. I sat on the bank of the river.

Do you remember Rup? How many times we used to come here. How many times we used to sit together and chat?

"There's nothing to remember."

Such words of Roop are shooting like an arrow in my chest. As soon as I calmed myself and took one of Roop's hands in my own, Roop removed his hand in one fell swoop.

I said yes. He used to make many excuses to hold this hand.

"You're the only one holding hands."

Can't we start again?

"No, I can't. I made thousands of pleas to you. Did you hear? Didn't you hear? You ignored me day after day. You hurt me. You didn't know I was crazy for you? You explained the price to me very well." .

You don't know I can't neglect. This is the one thing I hate the most in the world. And you drowned me in a sea of ​​neglect. Do you have any idea how I got through those days?

I didn't tell you once my mind went up, the second time I didn't sit there. I forbade you a thousand times, don't neglect me so much. That's it. "

I looked at Rupa very attentively and listened to her words. And he was looking at the river with one glance. He is not looking at me once. His words are ringing in my ears. He is not saying anything wrong. I thought well of Rupa but still I have not done anything wrong to him.

I apologize to you again for everything. Give me another chance. Believe me, I always looked for you but didn't find you.

"You don't know that the one who gets lost on purpose can't be found. I want to get away from you too. I don't want to be around you."

I couldn't stay any longer. I hugged Rupa. But she didn't hold me. She didn't even try to let me go again. She was cut for some time. At one point I let her go. I looked at her eyes and was startled.

"It's been a long time since I woke up." He got up.

As soon as he got up, I shouted,

"But you haven't answered me yet."

He looked at me.

"Wedding next Friday. I hope you've got your answer."

I was stunned to hear Rup's words. I can't believe my ears. After so many years, I will beat him forever. No, I can't accept it in any way.

You don't love me

"I loved you. I loved you very much. But you didn't understand the meaning of it. And the one who doesn't understand the meaning doesn't get it. You love me now. But when I was with you, you insulted this love day after day. The end of our love dream." You just did it. I just drew a line at that conclusion. "

Rupa started walking fast. Don't look back.

I stared at her. I felt helpless. She taught me to love and I took love away from her. I couldn't get any strength even when I got up. Even then I got up with a lot of trouble. Today I want to say that I love you very much