A Muslimah (Part 1)

Tick tock. Tick tock.

The clock was ticking by. I still lying on the bed while 'staring' at the white ceiling. It's cool huh? If you feel bored and don't know what to do, I bet you will stare at the ceiling or wall or tree or maybe sky.

I walk toward the bathroom and before I walk in, I read the dua* (doa*). Then, I said Bismillah. Now, I need to concentrate on doing wudhu*

Wash hands: 3 times;

Rinse mouth: 3 times;

Water in nose: 3 times;

Wash faces: 3 times;

Wash arms: 3 times:

Wipe head: 3 times;

Clean ears: 3 times;

Lastly, wash feet: 3 times.

I looked myself in the mirror and smile. My eyes looked so sleepy. I washed some cold water on my face. So, it felt refreshing.

I walk out from bathroom starting with right leg. I read the dua* and walk to my bedroom.

***

I'm not a perfect Muslimah but I try my best. Nobody is perfect. Everyone would make a mistake (sins). Here I am standing in front of the mirror. I'm Nur Qalisha, 22 years old.

My big brother comes into my bedroom and lying on my lovely bed.

"Finally, you will get married tomorrow. Woo" Adam said joyfully. He almost throws my fluffy pillow towards me, but then, he hugged it back.

"I'm scared."

Of course I'm scared. I'm not ready to be a wife. I don't know what will happen to me.I should live with my husband like my brother does.

"Why?"

I walk to my bed at sit down beside him. "You know who I am, right? I still like a kid. Childish. How can I be a wife?"

He gets up and sit properly. "You will change after you get married to him. You need to say yes and everything will be alright. If you are not sure, you should pray Istikharaa prayers (which Muslim believed to direct advice from Allah.)

"I know, but-"

"Listen. You need to do first, okay? Allah knows better. Whatever your answer, I'm sure that's for your best."

I flick my curtain and watch the sparkling stars, as Adam left. Oh Allah, I need your help. I need you.

For your information, I simply met him once. It's strange. I couldn't see his face properly cause I'm lowering my gaze. I know he was staring at me. Maybe?

I stared at the engagement ring. It was so beautiful. But, I can't wear it now. Because I need time to think.

My parents were hopefully on me that I will say yes. They said, he was a good person. I don't know him so much, but my parents did.

I was going to pray Istikharaa prayers. I should.

I wake up and sit properly. I got sweet dream. My answer is yes. Yes. I accept him! I should tell to abah and ummi that I'm accepting him. I look at the engagement ring, I can wear it later.

I got up from my bed with happiness, but my leg got tangled up with the blankets. Guess what happens next? I fall down from my bed! I'm so clumsy.

I stroke my leg softly. Tears pouring into my eyes. It's hurt. I looked at the clock, 5:40 a.m. I need to take a shower first and then, pray the Subuh prayer. Even my leg got into pain, I need to ignore it. It will be fine later.

***

I take off my telekung* (White praying-veil used by Muslim women.) And put tudung* (hijab/scarf-veil;for cover their head until their chest used by Muslim women) on my head.

I take a small red box and left. My eyes looked at Adam's room. It's dark. Maybe, he's in the living room with his wife, Abah (father) and Ummi (mother).

My hands still holding a small red box while walking at downstairs.

"There you are. My lovely son, Qalisha. Come here, honey."Ummi said. She patted on the sofa.

I smiled at them. This is my true smile, I mean my best smile. I sit beside Ummi and listen to them.

"Lace-mermaid dress? It's suit with her, honey." Syuhada said.

Syuhada is Adam's wife.

She is beautiful and mature. Unlike me. I looked like a little kid who want to play with her teddy bear every day. Adam said, she's the best chef after Ummi. Allahu, I'm not good at cooking. But, I know how to cook, but I'm not professional.

"No, how about baju kurung?"Adam said joyfully.

Syuhada pinches Adam's arm. "That's not funny. I will smash you after this."

She always said 'she will smash after this.' But, she never does that. That's kinda weird. I smile at them. Cute couple in a Halal way. Ummi and Abah also looked like a sweet couple. How about me?

I don't know.

"Qalisha, what do you want to wear on your wedding?"ummi asked.

"I don't know, but I don't care too much about dress."

Abah chuckled. "I want to see you. I bet you will look so beautiful like your mom."

Ummi feel so shy when Abah said like that. Her face was red. "Your mom looked so beautiful when she was young. But, she's older now."

Ummi stared at Abah with a narrow eyes. "You want to say that I'm not pretty? How could you."

We both laugh in the early morning. I will miss this moment. I need to change and be the best one.

"Well, I guess. I want that dress like not too tight and long. Make sure it is white or peach colours."

Ummi nodded as she understands. " It's suit for you but don't worry, Syuhada will choose the best dress for you."

"Okay, dearest. Let's breakfast. Abah was starving now."

I nodded. "I'm starving too!"

----------------------

1,2,3,4...5. We're sitting at the same table. We're like a happy family. Before we eat, Adam read dua*.

"Amin."

"Awesome. This's fried rice. I want it!"

I love everything about Ummi also other. I want to be strong like Ummi. She's never showing her fear or her sadness front of me. She's a lovely person. Always support what her children doing as long we're on the right way.

I looked at Abah. He's the brave man that I ever had. Protect me, cheer me up and always be patient with me. I couldn't be brave like him.

Brother. You're the best big brother. Always give me a good advice and spend time with me.

"Hey. What are you looking at?"Syuhada said.

"She's waiting her prince charming to sit beside her."Adam reply.

I punched his shoulder. "Funny."

To be continued...