Discover Yourself and Your Partner
No matter how long processes such as pre-marital dating and engagement take, what matters is how well you know your spouse in this process. Of course, people can change, sometimes you may have trouble even getting to know ourselves, but you may be worried about how to fully know another person. At this point, the important thing is your observation ability. How does your spouse react under what circumstances? What does he think when faced with any problem? How is he trying to deal with these difficulties? What delights him? When you observe your partner to get answers to such questions, after a while you will start to think "like him", you will be able to know how he feels without asking him. However, let's not go without saying that those who want to do this must first understand their own desires and desires, know their problems and weaknesses, in short, meet themselves. It will be much easier to get someone into your life at the point you meet yourself!
High Expectations Cause of Unhappiness in Marriage
One way to find peace in marriage is not to expect big changes in your life after you get married. Yes you are connecting your lives. But that doesn't mean you will have a new life. Your family, loved ones, problems, tastes, all will continue to be with you. You will only be combining them with your "favorite". Do not expect your partner to enter your life and make everything exciting and meaningful, to satisfy the feelings you lack, to take on the love you receive from your mother and the protection you find in your father. Otherwise, you may experience disappointment, blame the other person for not meeting your expectations, and cause insurmountable problems.
Don't Try To Change Your Spouse For A Happy
Marriage Let's say a golden rule for those who are looking for ways to make their spouse happy: Leave him alone! Of course, we don't mean that you don't care. Act with the awareness that trying to change your spouse's values, tastes, and behavior will cause problems in the marriage. Because waiting for him to change his features over the years just because you want it will be one of the biggest injustices you will do against your spouse. Of course, there may be some characteristics you want your spouse to change. The best way to solve this is to establish a "healthy" communication, to express your discomfort and to express your sensitivity on this issue.
Marital Problems Not Everyone Need to Know
When looking for the answer to the question of how to solve problems in marriage, you do not need to inform the whole of the problems you are experiencing. Because every person's reaction to problems will be different. Therefore, directing your relationship according to the advice you get from your environment can lead to bigger problems. In fact, this means that other people live your life. Also, of course, the advice you get from your families may be topics you can consult with them. But don't expect objective comments from your family. With the instinct to protect their children, they can be on your side even in matters where you are wrong. This may cause the problems to get worse. See how to deal with your problems with your spouse yourself.
The Concepts of "Empathy" and "We" for Harmony in Marriage
It's cliché but it works 100%. Empathy is what we need in all relationships, not just in marriage. Now that you have combined your life with your spouse, it's time to show empathy and put yourself in their shoes while reacting to all events and situations.
In this way, it will be easier for you to think of "us" in your marriage. To say "we" means putting aside the "me first" egos and caring about your partner's ideas and values, thinking for two. As long as you both do this, you can avoid problems caused by the conflict of egos.
Curb Your Anger, Apologize When Necessary
You will spend more time after marriage compared to dating. This can mean an increase in topics to discuss as well as enjoyable moments. Arguments in marriage are normal, of course, but how you deal with them is important. Considering that the words that will come out of your mouth in your angry moment can cause serious distress, it is useful to stay calm in discussions and to brake your anger. As soon as the debate flares up, it is important that at least one party remain calm to talk about the topic in a calm moment. Do not hesitate to apologize even when you find out that you were wrong while trying to solve problems. You will be surprised how quickly problems can be solved this way!
Listen More Than Tell
It Be careful to listen to your spouse during conversation or discussion. Note also that there is a difference between waiting in a turn to speak and actually listening. Speaking to justify yourself or just talk about yourself doesn't solve the problem, and a conversation like that is not enjoyable. Every person who is listened with respect will focus on problem solving instead of wanting to be right or wrong.
Have a Social Life
After getting married, do not focus your whole life on your spouse. Spend time for your family and friends. Create opportunities to participate in social activities. If you enjoy doing these together with your spouse, how happy it is, but give yourself the time to do your favorite activities by creating your own private space!
Be Bonkers in Beautiful Words
Do not hesitate to compliment each other and say nice words for a happy marriage. Everyone likes to get attention and to see that the excitement of the first day continues after marriage. Hugging each other every morning when you leave the house and when you come home in the evening, even saying that you miss him during the day is not a bad start.
Care About Harmony in Sexuality
When answering questions such as how to be a happy marriage, how should the relationship be in marriage, it is not without mentioning sexuality. Do not underestimate the contribution of the moments when you are alone with your spouse and your most natural state and the pleasure you get in these moments will make your relationship. Regardless of how many years you have been married, instead of creating pressure on yourself such as "We got married now," or "Is it after this age?"
Respect, Respect, Respect!
The cliché and popular answer to the question "What is the most important thing in marriage": Respect! It is popular because it may be the only common response from long-married couples. No matter how in love you are, you keep searching for the secrets of a long marriage unless there is mutual respect. Respect lies at the basis of your pleasant times, long conversations and even an exciting sex life. If you live by remembering the value of your spouse for you and being your partner with all the good or bad qualities he has, you will see that respect comes naturally!
We tried to answer the question “How to be happy in marriage” as much as we could. However, let's end by reminding that happiness in marriage does not have fixed formulas, and anything that will make the passion and excitement between you alive can be a cause of happiness. Maybe there are some of your "must-haves", those that you say "we should talk about this too". Don't forget to write it as a comment!