Life is so hard
life is so hard we don’t even realize how often we walk around complaining about how hard life is anymore.
It’s kind of trending, in fact.
But there’s no doubt that life is also amazing and wondering, and with the bad stuff always comes some form of goodness, even if it doesn’t feel that way at the time.
If you’ve ever found yourself crying into your hands wondering why life is so hard, you are definitely not alone.
But humanity is slowly, albeit painfully slowly, starting to realize that a lot of the bad things that happen to us do not actually happen to us, they are just things that happen.
It’s our negative attitude or disposition that turns neutral circumstances into something full of despair and anger, confusion and frustration.
You got it: emotions, thoughts, and feelings. They are what make life so damn hard.
But there are other things too. Here are 5 reasons why life continues to be so hard for you.
Before I get started, I want to let you know about a new personal responsibility work shop I’ve contributed to. I know that life isn’t always kind or fair. But courage, perseverance, honesty — and above all else taking responsibility — are the only ways to overcome the challenges that life throws at us.
You are Selfish.
Yikes, way to hit the ground running, right? If you are an overly selfish person you might find that life is a lot harder than people who tend to give of themselves to others.
We don’t mean you have to save a small country from famine or give someone the shirt off your back, but it is nice to consider others from time to time to take the focus off you.
When you take the focus off you, say to those poor, hungry people in the small country mentioned above, it makes you realize how good your own life is and it helps you to be grateful for what you have in life.
When we practice gratitude we are not only saying thank you to the universe for all that we have, but we are thankful for life in general. That makes life suck a whole lot less, trust us.
You are a Hypocrite.
If you are someone who tends to think she lives and dies by her word but then goes back on her word, either to yourself or someone you know, then you’ll find that life is not as fun as it could be.
The major reason people go back on their word is because of discomfort. We say we’ll lose 10 pounds in the new year, but it’s really hard.
In fact, it’s not hard at all.
What’s hard are the thoughts we have about losing 10 pounds. Losing 10 pounds is neutral. You say you’ll do something and then you don’t.
That’s what makes life harder than it needs to be.
If you do the things you said you would do, you’d live a much easier life, even if it means being uncomfortable from time to time.
(The only way to overcome adversity and conquer any challenge is through mental toughness. Check out my no-nonsense guide to developing mental toughness
We are Not as Free as We Think.
While humans like to hang on to the idea of free will, the truth is that many factors play into our decision making and choices in life
Many of which we are not even aware of.
Take, for instance, stories your parents tell about your hometown: do you also believe that there is nothing for a teenager to do in that small town on a Friday night besides break into cars?
Is that the story you believe or is that the story you grew up hearing and never bothered to question?
We carry with us a tremendous amount of information that is not of our own minds, yet we’ve adopted it as truth in our lives.
These thoughts often dictate how we make decisions and how we live our lives. “I can’t find another job.” Well, not with that attitude.
When you examine how you think and feel, you might find that your free will has been compromised by a lifetime of information coming from all directions.
Perhaps it’s time to consider another viewpoint?
You Don’t Take Responsibility.
I think taking responsibility is the most powerful attribute we can possess in life.
Because the reality is that YOU are ultimately responsible for everything that happens in your life, including for your happiness and unhappiness, successes and failures, and for the quality of your relationships.
However, a brutal life lesson is that few people take responsibility for their lives. They prefer to blame other people and be a victim. And this is why life continues to be so hard for them.
I’ll briefly share with you how taking responsibility has transformed my own life.
Did you know that 6 years ago I was anxious, miserable and working every day in a warehouse?
I was stuck in a hopeless cycle and had no idea how to get out of it.
My solution was to stamp out my victim mentality and take personal responsibility for everything in my life.
Fast forward to today and my website Hack Spirit is helping millions of people make radical shifts in their own lives. We’ve become one of the world’s biggest websites on mindfulness and practical psychology.
This isn’t about bragging, but to show how powerful taking responsibility can be…
… Because you too can transform your own life by taking complete ownership of it.
To help you do this, I’ve collaborated with my brother Justin Brown to create an online personal responsibility workshop. We give you a unique framework for finding your best self and achieving powerful things.
This has quickly become Ideapod’s most popular workshop.
If you want to seize control of your life, like I did 6 years ago, then this is the online resource you need.
5) People Suck.
At the end of the day, no matter how hard you work on yourself, there will be another person waiting in the wings to burst your bubble.
The great burden of being alive is that we cannot control other people. We can only control how we feel and how we react to the neutral circumstances that come our way.
Circumstance remains neutral until we assign a value to them and blow them way out of proportion.
Consider that the next time you find yourself face to face with someone you don’t like: is it the person you don’t like, or the things they are doing?
It might help you see them in a different way and tolerate them for the time being.
Remember though, that your frustration with other people, which only causes you discomfort, is about you and not them.