Missing my father and my youthful days

When i was growing us as an African child back in the days, we were used to living a life of fulfilment and those of satisfaction as well as we did virtually everything we had to do in so much joy and happiness as if we have seen what tomorrow looks like.

Everyday that passes by seems more to us like a flurry of a blessed day that would be filled with so much happiness personifying moments to grace ourselves with without having a true reflection or thought of what hard days seem to looks like.

In fact, the obvious reality here is that we never had or that we only had little to think or worry about especially as everything we enjoyed back then from all the well-meaning persons in our lives like our parents, our uncles and aunties provided all that with so much ease and most times, on a single request from us and then have them done.

I for one person never really thought of the dark times when I shall one day become a man who would fetch virtually or totally everything he needs all by himself and by himself alone even without the help of all the uncles, the aunties and the parents I once held responsible for such provisions.

I remembered vivdly when I was at the very tender age of just six(6)years old that my father called me to a separate room and then talked me into accepting the fact that I have to stand up as a man and begin to undertake some responsibilities on my own.

At first, I never really understood why he made that statement back then especially when you take a look at my relatively tender age that does not require that much of being a man since I was still but a kid and the next he did was to take me for the very first time to a pub-house where he introduced me to just a single glass of locally distilled chilled beer and then asked me to tell him what joy i've had taking this sweetening glass of chilled beer and my reply made him laugh as I wanted more but he quickly snapped after taking a very long and deep laughter and said to me, "son, this is one of the reasons why I want you to become a man and grow up even if I understand your relatively tender age".

My curiosity at this stage would not let me be as I continued asking him why and what does statements mean, then he finally opened up and told me to always do everything I have to do in limitations and never give in to too much drinking irrespective of how cheap and sweet they appear.

With that statement by him, I quickly recollected especially when he asked me about me about everything that had happened at the bar where we both were sitting and taking the beer and then replied him and said; " dad, I noticed you had talked another woman who isn't my mom that i'm certain about and after that, you had exchanged pleasantries but you never ever forgot to tell her that you were married and how much you loved your wife my mom and the next you did was to buy some roasted full chicken for mom while we were about leaving for the house and then finally, you never had more than just two bottles of these very cold and well distilled sweet beer.

Having said all that, my father was pleased I had really observed very right and then he said to me, "son? I replied with the most explicit of voices, "yes dad! That is exactly how I want you to always live your life after i'm gone from this mortal world.

He continued to outline them by fetching a piece of paper and a pen to make the list for me in this way.

1. Always remember to love your wife as your own self irrespective of what other women you meet on the outside world where you get to find yourself.

2. Always do everything you must do in modracy.

3. Never ever give in to too much alchohol irrespective of how cheap and sweet it is

4. And finally, always learn to come back home very very early no matter what you engage yourself with for those at home need you more than you are needed by those on the outside world.

Hmmmn! I was in a total state of awe after he had finished speaking and writing those few words of advice to me that I began asking him a few questions regarding women and what he exactly meant by those people on the outside world and he responded with the easiest of a direct answers - your friends.

He ended up by saying I should avoid women but that he will tell me more about sex education when i'm up to the sexual maturity age of say twelve (12) years of age so that I will fully understand what areas he's coming from and what things he meant while saying all that.

With that, he then asked me to resign myself to my bed in sleep and then ponder just a little more on those key highlighted note of advice he had chipped to me and then write them down on the "tablet of my heart".

I did all that and one thing I really got to notice about this wonderdul dad of mine was that of always seeking an amicable ways of settling disputes between him and my mom that most times we don't get to hear about them except on occassions when he tells us and shows us the ways to handle such situations when they begin to rear their ugly heads either in our own established families or elsewhere.

I was really satisfied that my dad really taught us especially myself the norms of life and how to handle such situations.

The unfortunate then happened

Oh! How has the day suddenly become so dark?

Oh! How have the big giant tree fallen to the ground leaving only the birds to petch and trample upon it?

Oh! How has the mighty fallen asleep so soon leaving no one to protect the gates and the walls so that no one would break in and steal?

Those were my words of outcry when it happened that on that fateful day when I was returning back from school as I was in primary two back then that a lot of unwanted visitors were seen all over the place in our house trying to console my mom who seem to be in so much sorrow and pains and I was stattled while I was still standing at a single point trying to understand what it was that was going on and why my mom was seen crying with a lot of persons consolling her did one of my sisters then rushed to me in tears and said our father is late.

Oh my God! How come I asked but the response wasn't quite clear as no one barely had the full mouth to talk to me for everyone seems to be more in pains from the demise of a lovely father and mentor i've got.

At that point, tears began to drop down my cheek for I have really lost a great gem, a good and caring friend, my play mate and a great mentor to me but I quickly put myself up and stopped crying as fast as I started crying to the amazement of everyone present and especially with my little age of just six (6) years for I duly remembered what candid espressions by father had made; "always learn to be a man in everything".

Yes! I did learn to be a man in that regard and as the arrangement for the burial rites took place, I was very very satisfied because i've been taught and as such, being made so strong by my father from those useful words of advice and encouragement which have solidly become my bedrock on a very solid foundation for me till date.

I was happy even though my dad died so early that ever since then, i've always learnt to live my life fully in the detects of what is right according to his chosen standards which of course appear true.

That was my story. what about you, do you have any moment you miss about your youth or your parents or uncles or aunties especially when such a situations appear so lovely and encouraging?

Pls let us know here at the comment section. Good morning and knowing fully well that you all had a splendid night rest.😴😴.

Love you all❤

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