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Random Thoughts of an Unmotivated Anxious Individual

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Written by   47
1 year ago

Everything feels so exhausting. Things that I'm passionate about isn't interesting anymore. I keep on falling behind others, I can't focus on my works. These things keep on draining me, I want to be productive but I have no energy to do that.

I find it hard to fix and control myself. I don't know why I'm like this. I feel sad for no reason or there's a reason but I'm not aware of it. I wanna change but it's hard to start and it's harder to be consistent.

I have a dream and it's scary that it's not enough to get me out of the bed. I think I need a long break but it's not possible on my current situation. Everything's frustrating.

I don't have enough mind stability to keep myself motivated. I just wanna lie down my bed and hold my phone. I've been stress eating these months too and got body shamed for being fat. Everything keeps on building up.

I feel more sensitive more than ever and needs lot of assurance and security. I don't wanna do my work, I'm not happy with it even if it's part of my dream.

I keep on studying multiple lessons without any proper environment. I have to study while doing house chores, nursing my siblings...sighs. Until one day I lost my energy to study and listen. I'm mentally clouded. I don't wanna be this empty.

I keep on having mental blocks, I'm always sleepy, I find myself hard to deal with. I think I need help...I'm not able to get myself up together.

My everyday Routine:

• Instead of waking up early and go on a jog with my puppy I end up having trouble with my sleeping routine and waking up later and has no energy to get up early

• I can't focus on my studies so I can't review well and it's greatly affecting my performance in a negative way

• I prefer to sleep than exercise

• I just want my phone then sleep and eat

•I don't force myself to things I don't feel like doing

•Self-doubting

•Overthink or not think at all

I'm now at the stage of how to start the change.

Rant and have someone hear you, release all of it then let's start. Just do it. Let's just do it.

Let's try to fix ourselves and set our mental health to the better.

We know that we can't continue being this way. I know it's hard but it'll be worth it once we overcome this phase.

In my case, I'm in a messy environment and I can't just get out of it then fix myself. I have to fix myself in this draining environment, I have no choice. I have to adjust or else I'll sink.

This is a serious fight between ourselves. This is not a small thing that you should shrug off. Facing and disciplining yourself is harder than what you think.

Let's just do it, so we can save ourselves from regrets and wasting time. It's better to suffer now then be happy later.

It's alright, we can do it!

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Written by   47
1 year ago
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