People fail to acknowledge the toxicity but always romanticize the idea that being in a relationship means people belong to people and that individuals own other individuals. This is not love, this is ownership. A partner is not someone who serves to complete you or accept you for who you truly are - a partner is a person who is individually complete and capable of making decisions, however good or bad it may be. This is not a justification of bad decisions but a lens to magnify the value of independence, self-worth and the privilege of decision-making.
The idea that love requires the full acceptance of one’s being including the support of their flaws and shortcomings is a sugarcoated concept of tolerating and defending one’s bad behaviors. We as humans are capable of identifying habits, manners and etiquettes of others, thus, we ourselves know the flaws that we possess. I’m not saying that we need to be perfect, I’m implying the purpose of being self-reliant, self-sufficient and striving to become a better version of ourselves for ourselves – one that inspires nothing but growth.
Before seeking a relationship, one must first be comfortable with being alone – it’s one way of protecting feelings, being aware of one’s own needs and knowing what one deserves. People rush into relationships for the fear of being alone and being unworthy of love but are too slow in realizing the value of self-worth and being independent and that people also settle into relationships regardless of how toxic it is, for the sake of “having” someone. This is a reminder that each and every one of us has the right to choose and make decisions and that includes change and creating boundaries from people who do not support growth in our lives - this also includes changing one’s self for the better.
Excessive needs for validation in order to function and have a sense of purpose, codependency, obsession and possessiveness will not bring you love, it only leads you to chaos and turmoil. People need to normalize prioritizing themselves above all else – call it selfish, call it what you want because at the end of the day, putting someone else’s worth above yours, is a betrayal to your own value. You are worthy and you do not need the presence of another for you to see your worth, your importance does not depend on someone else’s approval because you are significant enough and you are the fundamental character in your own life.
Prioritizing yourself does not hinder the value of others but it does lessen the cost of wasted time and toxic relationships because seeing your worth means that you’re not going to settle and stay with a person who does not benefit or enable growth in your bond.
A relationship should be built on individualistic priorities strengthened by support and rights. Your partner does not owe you anything, no matter how profound the love is or how long the relationship has been, the foundation should always be self-worth. A relationship should not enable toxicity, tolerance, control and ownership – it should be a partnership that enables healthy individualistic development. With the romance that is being idealized on social media and the love conceptualized through songs, it is no wonder that people are falling into the idea of love and not the actual person. It’s time to romanticize self-sufficiency and self-worth and stop romanticizing the concept of relationships.
When you are in a relationship this is the best feeling you ever had felt before. This post is written on relationships. One day my friend was searching for an escort service on the internet. Then i told him about German and London escorts near Frankfurt services. Because I also take service from that persons before. They give me offer also because i am the old customer.