F.e.a.r

I'm sorry, I have not been active here. I have been seriously ill for a weak. I have been on treatment for a week and there have been improvements. Let me not bore you all with my health. I'm here to tell you about my fears. What is fear? ***F- Fake*** **E-Elements** **A-Appearing** **R-Real** That is it. It's my mind telling me I can't do it. This fear has denied me of so many things while growing up. People had looked down on me because I was scared to express myself. At times, before I would open my mouth to talk, I would have to paraphrase those words I'm about to blurt out in my head again because I was so scared of committing grammatical blunders. When I was in my teens, I used to be in the church youth choir. Luckily for me I was in the same parish. So one day I was told to sing a song in one of our rehearsals, I stood up and you need to see the way I was shaking like a leaf everyone busted out laughing. Since I had been looked down on as one who can't sing. I can still remember this when I was very much younger. I used to be an outspoken person but when it comes to doing a public thing, I will become numb. So on that very day, I was selected to make a speech. Guess what, I went on stage and began looking at the back. The photographer came up to caution me but in my mind, I said "this man does not know what is going on. Immediately, I made my incomplete speech and rushed back to my seat. Since then, no one deared giving me any speech. Another time, it was during a drama rehearsal in school in my 100level days. I was given a role to act, I rehearsed my lines and I knew I was scared. I went on stage to act my part, come and see the rubbish I was saying. It was as if they came was away what I have rehearsed. Everyone began laughing again, I mustered courage and went back to my seat. After these incidents, I have vowed not to do anything public again. But I don't know how the jinx got broken. In my final year, I took two lead roles to act in our church drama. I delivered my lines on the d-day, come and see the humor and how people laugh at my actions. Or was it singing, I now sing with much confidence and pride. I sometimes take the lead songs. How it all changed I can't tell, I just found confidence in christ. See eh, it was as bad as I know an answer to a question may be in a conference but I won't stand to talk, I was scared that people will laugh at me. Well, let me tell you, I saw this as a burden because it won't help me. So I took it to the Lord in prayer and consciously begin to drop that fear and now I can face anyone and you would wonder who is giving me such guts. Thanks for reading friends. Like, upvote and comment.