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What Is Holding You Back To Be Successful?

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Avatar for Peter-Molnar
Written by   144
1 month ago
Topics: Blog, Thoughts, Goals

If you are a woman, then I'm sure, that you've heard this one before. It's probably been said to you more times, than any other question ever has. You get the same answer all the time: "I am not good enough."

The problem with that statement is there isn't really anything wrong with you. What is wrong with being a woman? You are not lacking in natural smarts. In fact, you probably have more natural smarts, than most men, yet still you feel the need to be "better" or "smarter."

The Real Problem Is The Way Women Are Supposed To Act

The way society has decided women are supposed to act versus how they actually want to act is vastly different. It isn't until they break free of that mold that they will ever be able to truly succeed in life, but if the only way they achieve success is to fit into a certain box, then what motivation do they have?

Of course that motivation is so they can exist in society, but once again the structures are in place to make that impossible. Even if they manage to fit into the box, they still won't be able to truly be happy.

Basically they need to fight against the system. I understand that it must be hard to want to bite the hand that feeds them, but that's exactly what they need to do. They need to stop being a pawn of the system. This might seem pretty bleak, and I'm not saying, that to scare them; I'm saying it because it needs to be said.

Find Your Own Path In Life

What that path is, well that's for you to decide. The problem is, that society has laid out a pretty specific path for you to take. You need to ignore what they are telling you and develop your own ideas. You don't need to do this alone though. Find someone, that shares your goals and ambitions and strive to succeed with them. You will see, that it will be worth it. Also always know, what people expect from you. If something doesn't seem fun, then you shouldn't be doing it.

You need to have fun while still advancing yourself, because believe me this isn't going to be all fun and games. In fact, I don't even want to tell you most of what you should and shouldn't do, because you need to figure all of that stuff out for yourself. The point I'm trying to make is, that you need to start thinking for yourself in all aspects of your life, especially how you want to be viewed by others.

Image Source: https://www.publicdomainpictures.net/en/view-image.php?image=364728&picture=the-path-of-life

Start Seeing The World Through New Eyes

I've noticed about people, who have found their passion in life is they don't really worry about what other people think. If something is in their path and they want it, they go get it. They don't care if it's "girly" or "boyish." They don't care if it's popular or unpopular. They don't care what it takes. They just do what they want, and most of the time, that's what other people respond to.

Think about it, if someone really wanted to stop you from getting into medicine, just because they don't like the idea of women in the field, they'd be pissed that you're going to medical school and try to block or delay your applications, and even then you were going to get in anyway.

But, that mentality isn't the exception, it's the norm. If you want to be something, but are focused on something else, you're almost bound to fail. People will try to set you back. It's how the world works. Don't let them do it.

Image Source: http://www.rebellesociety.com/2018/02/06/abigailtamsi-grief/

Be Passionate

This is kind of related to the previous point, but when you truly love something, you don't do it half way. If you like doing something, you should be going all the way with it. If you don't have passion, then why bother doing it?

I get that this is easier said than done, and you're probably thinking you don't have anything you love and that you can't think of anything to take up your time. Well you're wrong. You love learning and that's what's going to get you through this, so start filling your mind with as many facts as you can. Think of it this way, if you're ever in a situation, where you have to choose between health and death, which will you choose? How are you going to react if you're ever put in that situation? What skills do you have, that can help you survive? What other skills do you have, that can help you in that situation?

I know you want to think of this as "just in case." That's perfectly fine. We all need to prepare for the worst. But even if you never get that way, just think about how much knowledge you're gaining and how much sharper your mind is going to be. Your brain is going to hold a lot more information, than most people's and it's going to make you feel more powerful. Power is something, that the world desperately wants, and it's something, that you have in abundance.

Boring Overused Phrases

"Follow your dreams", "Don't be afraid to fail", and "Believe in yourself" are some of the most overused pieces of advice in this world. They're usually said by people you don't even know or trust, and they're not helping you at all.

Try and think of it like this:

You have two paths in front of you, one is a long and very uncertain path of trials and tribulations, that may or may not even exist, the other is a straight line with a certain ending. Which one would you choose?

The uncertain path has a 50/50 chance of taking you to where you want to go and who knows if you'll even survive.

The other path, the certain path, may not be easy, but rest assured you'll definitely get to where you want to be.

So choose your path, wisely and carefully.

Take The Certain Path To Be Successful

With all your effort, practice and learning related things to achieve your goals and be successful, eventually you get the hang of it, its not as easy as it looks but with enough dedication and effort you'll get there. It's not going to be fun, you're going to have to work hard and sometimes, that involves facing against the fact, that you will fail. But if you keep on trying, you'll eventually get to where you want to be.

After you get there, you'll look back on this experience and be glad, that you made the choices, that got you there. So remember, choices have consequences, but those consequences don't have to be bad, if you make the right ones. Just choose wisely and carefully in the first place.

Image Source: https://www.inc.com/eric-holtzclaw/the-path-to-certain-startup-success.html

Is Determination Really The Only Thing You Need To Succeed?

Determination is definitely a key part of getting ahead in life, but its not the only one.

Diligent: Diligent people are the ones, that set aside time each day to work on their goals and continue to practice what they're learning. They may have a rough idea of where they're going, but they're not strolling there; they're taking perfectly measured steps along the way.

Unlucky: Unfortunate people tend to take a "let's try anything" approach to life. They tend to not bother with the tedious things, because they don't see the need to. They usually end up failing, because they didn't take the time to master their chosen field of endeavor. The ones, that do succeed generally are the ones, who dedicate themselves to their chosen field wholeheartedly.

Curious: The curious type of person wants to know everything there is to know about a particular topic. They will spend days, or even weeks, researching a particular topic and often go to extremes to learn more about it. They tend to have a very narrow field of interest, but they are the most dedicated of all types. These types are often labeled as "nerds" and not usually appreciated by their fellow classmates, but their persistence and dedication usually comes through in the end.

Intelligent: Intelligence in and of itself isn't going to win you any ladders. Intelligence is a very important factor in ladder climbing, but there are other traits, that you'll need to be a well rounded intelligent. For example: You need to be a good judge of character and learn to trust others. Some of your friends are going to be snakes and some aren't, so it's important, that you know who is reliable and who isn't. Recognize when you need a break. While intelligence is certainly a trait, that will set you apart, over-working yourself can lead to burn out. You'll need to take time to re-energize your mental reserves.

Conclusion

Well, those are your choices. Ever since you took control of your own destiny by changing your major, you've been making good progress in that major. You've learned a lot and have gotten used to the college lifestyle. You're even enjoying it. So are you going to continue your current path and continue doing well in your major, or take a risk and change it up?

Note: This choice affects future stories. Your choice here will determine which stories are told.

Thank you for reading.

This article is for @JonicaBradley's writing prompt #9: Success

Lead Image Source: Unsplash

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Written by   144
1 month ago
Topics: Blog, Thoughts, Goals
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Comments

I have a lot of reasons that's why there's no change in my life. If I will choose to, for sure I can do it but, yah there's always a but at the end. I don't really know my reasons why I'm not taking a step on my comfort zone, the problem is in me actually, number one is my confidence. I don't know, I'm not sure with my decisions in life 😖. If only I can take even a small step, 😖

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1 month ago

Those who love taking risk will surely win. Those who are brave will be rewarded. But sometimes, there are really things that holding us back to do what we love, and sometimes it is fine. We just need to take things lightly and one step at a time. Do not mind what other thinks as well.

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1 month ago

What's holding my back? Tons of responsibilities 🤣🤣

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1 month ago

Success never comes easy it takes a lot of failures, struggles and etc. If one cannot handle all of it then they are not worth to be successful.

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1 month ago

I totally agree with you Eybyoung. We need to learn to fail too and learn from it.

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1 month ago

Definitely will took the risk! I've made for greater than this! HAHA.

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1 month ago

That is very good for you Meyzee. You see only the brave wins.

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1 month ago