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When you know you have a goal or something you should do, but you don't do it, because you limit yourself in it. One of the best known signs of self-sabotage is not doing something, because you are procrastinating or afraid of something. You are afraid, that you might fail.
Dive into your thoughts and examine more deeply, what thoughts are going through your mind. Negative thoughts, self-judgment, feeling sorry for yourself for the situation you are in. If you are experiencing these, you can be sure, that you are sabotaging yourself.
If something in your life has not worked out at all or not the way you wanted it to, for example, you wanted to learn something, but learned something else instead, you wanted to travel somewhere but it didn't work out, you wanted to join a company, but for some reason you never did, these are also signs of self-sabotage.
There are also disappointments. Not just relationship disappointments, but also disappointments at work, with friends, or perhaps with family. It is also a sign of self-sabotage, if you didn't stand up for yourself in any situation, we can also talk about conflict at work, with friends or in a relationship, when you didn't fight for what was right.
When you put more importance on what others think of you and try to appear and behave accordingly. You are afraid of what others will think of you if you don't do something or dress like most people and feel bad about it.
Competition Against Others
It is not advisable to compare yourself with others in dress, behavior or knowledge. If you see others as better, than you at something, having more knowledge, more money, you will only be holding yourself back in both getting ahead and developing your confidence and self-esteem. In short, you sabotage yourself.
We say many times, that we wish I hadn't done it, that it would have been better if I hadn't interfered, and many more.
Judgments are very often made about anyone or anything, without knowing someone or experiencing something. "I find this person very unlikable" even though we have not exchanged a word with them or "I certainly wouldn't like this food." How do we know if we've never tasted it?
The most common judgment is when we underestimate ourselves and say, "I can't do this. I'm not smart enough, strong enough, I don't have the experience" and so on. We deprive ourselves of a lot of opportunities. If I had told myself, that I wasn't good at blogging, I wouldn't be here now and I wouldn't be writing every day.
This is the most obvious sign of self-sabotage. Just out of sheer laziness, we don't do our work and thus procrastination leads to a build up of unfinished business and in the end we don't even know which one to start with.
If you don't like yourself, you create a negative environment and atmosphere around you in which you don't feel good and therefore you won't take the necessary steps to achieve your goals and make your dreams come true. Your every day will be boring and you won't care that much about the people around you. You will blame yourself for everything.
It's also worth thinking about whether we are sabotaging ourselves in achieving our goals and getting things done, or whether we are being sabotaged by our environment. This can also happen, but in this case it is up to us whether we allow ourselves to be influenced by the people or life situations around us.
Others can underestimate us, not just ourselves. We hear that you can't do it or that you are not experienced enough and so on. If we are bombarded with these and similar things, we can lose heart and not even get on with what we wanted to do. Don't let yourself be influenced by anyone, because you sabotage yourself.
The other common self-sabotaging sign is when you have a very important meeting the next day, you have an interview, you have an exam or whatever, which is very important to you and you know you have to do well, because a lot is riding on it, but the night before you think it is important to keep watching your series, because you are dying of curiosity about what is going to happen and of course one episode follows another.
You can't stop even though it's very late and you know very well, that you should be asleep by now. Because of this, you wake up the next day tired and can't concentrate fully on what you're doing.
Usually, these self-sabotaging things are left over from our youth, inherited from others. If you recognize any of the above self-sabotaging signs, it's worth thinking about which areas you need to pay more attention to and work on.