This is such a sensitive topic to talk about and growing up in a chaotic home surrounded by a violent community it felt as though we were raised to join the Spartans in due time.
Just thinking
Looking through the window of the passenger side and staring at the other driver screaming because the traffic light turned red. Slamming against the steering wheel, do you think they fist anything else at home? or how about the customer who thinks they are always right and starts shouting at the service consultant, do you think they shout at home just as bad?
Whose encouraging it
So many organizations are speaking up against gender based violence, more in particular men abusing women and children. Is it not the mentally that matters, for example, pre-teen boy and girl fights, the boy says “girl hit me first”, mom of boy says “good hit her back don’t be bullied”. Many years later the boy beats up his girlfriend and says “she cheated on me” mom of the boy says “I’ll kill you for beating her”. Is it just me or was there a problem from the beginning with influence on perspective?
The way we think is what we teach through lifestyle. It’s wrong to be abusive but it’s okay to be aggressive, rude and hateful with hate speech. Once they arrest the abuser the victim with mental stains of pain in the house takes on the role of abuser. Meanwhile, the abuser is being fed an aggressive nature by their captives. Is it just me or is there no solution at this point but a vicious cycle?
Are we easily influenced?
Society subconsciously feeds the abuse into our minds all the way from the top and powerful, our guardians and then filtered done. The wealthy and rich feel they have the right to be rude publicly because their lawyers will handle and control the desired outcome so too criminals disrespect their community and make people feel worthless because their weapons resolve their problems and so society copies what seems to be the stronger side of life and the domino effect encourages aggression.
Let’s stop gender based violence by whatever means because the issue is our mentality. Let’s change our mentality and the way we influence our society. Let’s stop violence by incorporating ethics and good values in our daily movements through life. Stopping the current pain is a momentary solution while a true resolution is the conscious acceptance of mental and verbal change, saying “let’s be better people” is answered through character.
We have become our past
Growing up in my community scolding and shouting was common, I walked by a house where a boy was beaten for stealing and it was a normal occurrence for the folks. Fighting was embedded into our culture. We don't accept wrongdoing and we resolved it by doing wrong.
I was insulted for not taking part with the other boys in bullying a girl so I got bullied in return and that same girl turned on me just to be accepted in society as strong.
I met men and women today doing the same thing, encouraging and pressurizing each other to do it, do it with him, do it to her, don’t be good, beat the living breath out of them. Those same adults advise the youth to go out there and take no rubbish from anyone. Translated in the mind of an abused youth is “pain for pain”. Those youngest grow to be the same adults I avoid today because the cycle keeps continuing over and over again.
Let's find a way to stop it
We want to stop violence we need to stop ourselves. We lack the knowledge on how to change, how to do things like handle confrontation. We hear the voices of our past screaming at us “go show them who you are” translated means go be violent. How do we resolve a violent situation after trying to calm it down? Wisdom, there is always a way but we need universal participation for a long-lasting remedy.
This is just a man venting, blowing off steam because he fears that even though he changes will it be enough to inspire the boy who meets his daughter at a party to respect her and when he hears her screaming comes to her rescue even though his peers fight him he will do the right thing the way I did the right thing and was bullied by the girl I rescued.
This time around society will be different I hope.
