Shipwrecked

Day 10. I think. I'm over the initial shock of being in a plane crash. The first few days were rough. Good thing I saw Cast Away. I set up an SOS on the beach. I scavenged the wreckage for sustenance. I seem to have a plethora of grooming supplies, some first aid supplies and maybe enough water bottles for another week. I burned the dead I could find, which was awful. Saved the IDs if they had them.

Things got better after that. I've started swimming every day and walking along the beach. By trial and error but I've managed to salvage enough sharp edges from the wreckage to construct a rough axe. I managed a nice little lean-to using some wreckage parts and palm fronds. I gathered enough soft items to make a bed. It's not my Saatva Zenhaven, but it's weird how well I'm sleeping.

Day 15. Had to go inland to find water. It was pretty easy because I found a trail that led to a nice pool with a waterfall. Managed to haul back some water. I'm glad I contributed to that water well project in Africa. The stories don't express the inconvenience enough.

I wonder what the headlines say about the crash. About me being missing. I hope my CEOs know what they are doing. I hope my family doesn't squander my money. I see them twice a year, it's not like they'll miss me.

Day 20. I'm moving my camp to beside the pool. As much as I like the beachfront I think walking to the ocean to fish is going to be easier than hauling water. I'm doing a little better structure this time. Dragging some salvage from the wreckage but mostly using fallen limbs from around the pond.

Day 40. I've developed a routine. I wake and take a quick shower in the waterfall. I drink some coconut milk and walk to the beach. I've decked out the fuselage with some brightly colored objects from the wreckage, hoping it might be visible from the air. I redraw my SOS in the sand daily. I take a run along the ocean. I've dropped enough weight that I've had to scavenge a size smaller shorts.

Day 43. I'm becoming a better spear fisherman. I usually can nab a fish in an hour or so. An hour to do something so simple might have sent me into a rage in my corporate life, but here, I've developed this Zen about time. I live in each moment. I feel alive each moment.

After I eat my fish I go exploring. Sometimes along the ocean front and sometimes inland. I climbed the cliff to the top of the waterfall yesterday. I would never have attempted this in my other life. I recognize I might fall and get hurt and that might be the end of it, but I also recognize that every thing like this I do makes me stronger and more skilled to survive. I just take everything slow and careful. I look at everything. I hear everything. It's as if my senses have awoken. I never realized how little I relied on them before.

Day 50 (I think). I walked the entire breadth of the island, along the oceanfront. I met some monkeys. They were fun to watch.

Day 52 I've started trying to make a map of the island. I've also started building a new structure, a better, more permanent house. I've laid it out much more deliberately and have some beams in place. I found a nice ledge just above the freshwater pool. There has been just be a little rain every afternoon so I assume there may be some kind of rainy season or storm season coming later and I want to be ready. My house will be high enough to avoid flooding and in a crevice to protect it from wind. It faces away from the pool to prevent my construction dirt runoff into the pool. These are things I might never have considered if I was building a house in my old life. View and convenience would have been all I considered.

Day 58. After I finished fishing I went to the monkey colony and watched them all day. I was so entertained.

Day 62. It's weird that I don't have manual for any of this survival stuff but logic and instinct seem to guide my decisions. I remember reading about a collective unconscious in college. I wish I've paid attention because I think I understand it now when I sit on the beach at night and look at the stars and think about how many people have done that. How astronomy and religion are responses to that. I never thought about any of this stuff or felt it was important before. I feel an ancient knowledge running through me.

Day 70. I've tried to keep count of days but it's becoming increasingly less important. I breathe in and out and my breaths are important. The sun on my back is important. The fish. The water. The sand under my feet. I am not the person I was. The plane crash feels eons ago. My life before feels like a fuzzy, shallow dream in monochrome.

Day 75. My map is finished. I've identified geographical landmarks, the location of all fresh water. The places to find coconuts and berries. The best fishing spots. I tried to think of lovely names for places. In my old life I would have hired PR and Ad firms to give everything a nice name. I realize how uncreative I have become when all I can come up with is "Fresh water" for the pond and "Waterfall" for the falls.

Day 90. I started counting days again. I think it might be useful in tracking weather. I trying to note rough differences in temperature, wind direction and rainfall. I realize none of this is anything I can control. I've relinquished the need to control. I expect I will be a different sort of executive should I ever return to that life.

Day 97. I heard a plane today. I was lying in a hammock I built at a beach on the opposite side of the island from the wreckage. I've built some experimental crab traps. I've seen some crab shells on the beach and hope I might eventually enjoy a new treasure from the sea. I thought about trying to run over the the wreckage and realized it wouldn't matter. They either see it or they don't.

Day 150. I've concluded the first plane didn't see the wreckage. I'm pretty sure the one flying overhead isn't seeing it either. I've taken down the brightly colored markers. I've stopped refreshing the big SOS. I realize that I don't care if I'm found. I am more fit and agile than I've ever been. I'm more aware of my own body, my surroundings, nature, the life that teems around me and within me. I'm more mentally healthy than I've ever been. I realize that my relationships were all built on my ability to manipulate and control others. Toxic. I don't care to do that anymore and I'm not sure I know how to have healthy relationships or whether I'm up to relearning how to interact with other people. I'm calm and at peace alone here. They can come or not come. My life is good here.

*****

THE END.