Roses are Red

[WP] You're a supervillain whose latest evil scheme threatens to throw the city into chaos unless your nemesis goes on a date with you. To your surprise, they agree with enthusiasm before you can even explain what the consequences of refusing are.

*****

"At least take me out on a date before you tie me up," said Neuro Lady, giggling through her restraints. "You'll end up alone if you lead like this."

I ignored the comment and carried on with my scheme. The data was still being downloaded. Once I had these financial records, I'd be able to blackmail my way out of any trouble. Her words stung more than an energy beam to the chest, but I had to ignore them.

Neuro Lady was just playing mind games. She didn't even put up a fight before I sprung my trap on her, which probably meant reinforcements were on the way.

"I don't think you understand the situation," I said. "I could kill you right now."

Neuro Lady smiled. "But you won't."

I frowned. "Is that a challenge?"

Neuro Lady shook her head. "Not at all. I'm just saying, if you were actually going to kill me, you would've done it already."

"Maybe I want you as a bargaining chip."

"Nah, I've read your file. The other heroes won't admit it, but you're not as bad as they say."

I widened my eyes.

"That's what I thought," said Neuro Lady, smugly satisfied.

I turned away from her. "Shut up. You don't know me, or what I'm capable of."

"I know. That's why I didn't put up a fight, despite sensing your presence. I'm willing to listen if you feel like sharing."

I glared at her. "Why do you care?"

"Because I think it's a pity that someone as brilliant as you is wasting their talents with crime, especially since you go out of your way to avoid civilian casualties. At some point, you must've been an idealist."

"Yeah, well, we all grow up."

"Have you? I mean, being a supervillain is kinda childish too, you know."

"No, being a villain is the smart choice in a world that only rewards cruelty. Heroes fight for their own advantage because the status quo benefits them."

Neuro Lady grew a bit solemn. "Not everyone is like that. Sure, some heroes abuse their positions, but most of us do it because we actually believe in justice."

I scoffed. "Justice. Probably the biggest lie I've ever heard."

"Really? What made you conclude that?"

"That fact that-" I stopped myself from finishing the sentence. "I see what you're doing, and I'm not falling for it."

Neuro Lady tilted her head, confused. "What do you mean?"

"Don't play dumb! You're just pretending to care!"

Neuro Lady hung her head, despondent. "I'm really not."

"Bullshit! Beautiful women never give a shit about me!"

Neuro Lady raised her gaze. "You think I'm beautiful?"

I paused. "T-that's not what I-"

An alarm snapped me out of my awkwardness.

A group of heroes led by Edgelord had just infiltrated the building. They were currently fighting my robots, but it wouldn't take long for them to reach the server room.

I scowled at Neuro Lady. "I knew it. You were just distracting me, weren't you?"

"What? No!"

I didn't have time to wait for the download to finish. My plan had been ruined. I teleported away with my watch before they could enter the room. Despite escaping, I had never been angrier over a failed scheme.

Heroes were all fake.

I would die on that hill for the rest of my life. They love using nice-sounding words if it can make them popular but, the second they're forced to follow through on them, they all show their true nature.

Neuro Lady was no different. Her words haunted me for the rest of the week. I needed to prove her wrong. She didn't care about me. Nobody did.

My plan was simple. I'd rig EMP bombs around the city, threatening to fry all electronic devices, and force Neuro Lady to admit her hypocrisy. It was perfect. Once she realized I wasn't bluffing, she would think twice before looking down on me.

I rode my mech-suit into the middle of downtown, ready to fight anyone who got in my way, and waited for her to show up. If other heroes tried to stop me, and Neuro Lady didn't appear, then that would be all the proof I'd need to know her words were hollow.

To my surprise, however, Neuro Lady was the first on the scene.

"We meet again," I said.

Neuro Lady hovered across from me. "A shame it has to be under these circumstances."

"Spare me the platitudes, we both know it's a lie."

Neuro Lady sighed. "There's no way I can convince you, is there?"

"There is, actually." I cleared my throat, slightly embarrassed. "Go on a date with me, or I'll-"

"Sure!"

I squinted. "Eh?"

"What time?"

"I... I didn't even finish. Do you know what I'm threatening?"

"Does it matter if I say yes?"

I glanced away. This couldn't be real. No. I was damn sure it wasn't. Typical 'hero' behavior. Saying whatever felt good at the moment with no regard for reality. No sane person would genuinely entertain the idea of dating me. This had to be a trap.

"I don't know what you're plotting, but-"

"Yeah, yeah, you don't trust me. Is eight fine? I get off patrol at six but I'd like to freshen up a little."

"I... Uhh... Sure. Eight works. Meet me at the park."

"Neat! I'll see you then!"

I saw her fly away and felt an odd sensation in my chest. Could she really like me? No. Of course not. There had to be an ulterior motive. Maybe she thought placating me was the easiest way to neutralize the threat. I frowned. Yeah, that was it. Neuro Lady just tricked me into stepping down. This date was going to be an elaborate sting operation. I'd have to be an idiot to show up.

And yet, my pride didn't let me ignore it. The date was my idea. It'd be weird if I didn't go. More than that, this could be the perfect opportunity to beat her at her own mind game.

Unfortunately, despite setting up every single detail of my bomb threat, I never actually accounted for Neuro Lady saying yes. I facepalmed and teleported back to my base, realizing I needed a plan for our date.

*****

THE END.