Genie-us

[WP] The Genie looks at you puzzled 'So... you wish for everyone to have 4 arms?', and you say 'yes, I wish that tomorrow everyone wakes up having 4 arms, no explanation, just 4 arms, and if they only had 1 arm or none now they have 4'

*****

For the first time in his life, the genie didn't immediately grant a wish. He only blinked in astonishment at what he heard.

Throughout millennia he had granted a plethora of strange wishes, like never feeling itchy again or having a really good lawyer, but this one truly stood above the rest. Even the weirdest wish made sense in context. At least those masters had an immediate need that had to be fulfilled.

Many of them sacrificed a lot to acquire the lamp. Seeing them struggle under the weight of unlimited power was half the fun of being a genie. Slowly regretting their choices, isolating themselves with paranoia, making short-sighted decisions to survive. The genie lived for that drama. It made immortality actually bearable.

This guy, however, had no such pressure. He wielded a bored expression, crossing his arms with impatience. Not a shred of hesitance behind his eyes.

"Are you sure about this?" asked the genie. "You only get three, you know."

Steve shrugged. "It's fine if you can't do it."

The genie frowned. "I never said that."

"Then what's the problem?"

"My powers are nearly infinite! I could make you a king! Or insanely rich! Or even bring world peace!"

Steve scratched his chin, contemplating. "World peace, huh?"

"Yes! Anything is possible!"

"Then why hasn't anyone wished for that, yet?"

The genie pursed his lips, suddenly quiet.

Steve raised an eyebrow. "Well...?"

"Four arms, you say?" The genie snapped his fingers. "Your wish is my command."

Society would never be the same again. The entire fashion industry suffered a complete overhaul in less than a day. Companies rose and fell faster than anyone could predict, tanking the stock market, with only those who adapted the quickest being able to survive.

That wasn't the only consequence, though. Many criminals who had just been handcuffed suddenly found themselves with an extra pair of limbs. The police officers didn't even bother chasing them, shocked by their own new mutations. Mayhem ruled the world for a week while people grew adjusted to the change. It was hilarious. Some even started a religion over the incident.

Steve didn't show any horror or delight in this, though. He simply observed everything with a neutral expression.

The genie had a hard time understanding his master's mind. He wouldn't question it, though. This had been the most interesting use of his powers ever. It was the first time the genie didn't have to twist a wish into backfiring. The consequences rippled without even having to misinterpret his master.

As weeks turned into months, he started to wonder what the next wish would be. Most masters didn't take this long to make another request. Whatever Steve had planned, it had to be big. Did he plan to take advantage of the chaos? Or was it all for his amusement? Either way, the genie wouldn't complain. To his disappointment, though, Steve didn't alter his life in the aftermath. He simply went about his business like nothing had changed.

The genie started to fear that would be his only wish, until one day hearing him randomly say:

"I wish everyone could fly."

The genie squinted. "Really? Just that?"

"Problem?"

"Y-you could be the new pope of four arms."

"That sounds like a lot of work."

"Fine, I'll-"

"Wait!"

The genie paused, suddenly thrilled. Did he reconsider? Would he do something crazier?

"Make sure to give everyone wings, not just levitation."

The genie hung his head. He should've known better. With a snap of his fingers, he made it happen, and yet another societal uproar occurred.

The fashion industry pretty much collapsed at that point. They had barely gotten used to the new limbs and couldn't keep up with another change. Many people simply gave up on wearing shirts, or no clothes at all. Fittingly, this also became doctrine in the new religion of four-arms. Along with fashion, both the airlines and automobile industries went bankrupt. Nobody needed them anymore now that they could fly. It also caused the price of oil to plummet, which almost destroyed the economy.

People didn't kill each other, though. In fact, civilization grew more peaceful in a few months. Everyone was so confused and scared that they didn't have the energy to fight each other. At least, for that short period of time.

Steve, like usual, didn't even crack a smile.

The genie felt slightly terrified of his master as time went on. Most people could be predicted. They all had a goal, a reason for finding the lamp, but this guy just did everything on a whim. Not amusement or profit. Just... wishing for its own sake. What could possibly be his third wish?

Steve waited a year to make his final request. The world had been completely altered, but people adjusted to this new way of living. Some even eagerly awaited the next great change, including the genie. Steve must have been thinking really hard about his next wish. It would surely be a big one. Then, like last time, in the middle of a random afternoon, Steve simply said:

"I wish all my wishes were reverted."

The genie froze.

"What?"

"Really? Everything back to normal?"

Steve nodded. "But I don't want anyone dying by falling out of the sky. Give them time to land safely."

The genie sighed. "This is ridiculous."

"Why?"

"Because..."

"Because you can't twist it into something that ruins me?"

The genie glanced away.

"That's what I thought" said Steve.

"I give up," said the genie, snapping his fingers. "I will never understand you. Did you just want to waste my time?"

Steve shook his head, then smiled. "I just wanted world peace."

The genie furrowed his brow, confused. "How...?"

"People are too arrogant nowadays. They always assume the world is one way, and call that 'normal'. Anything that deviates from that is seen as bad. By twisting everyone's perception, they'll think twice of what normal really means, and maybe they'll learn to stop making snap judgements."

"Why didn't you just wish for that?"

"I'm not an idiot. Every genie story shows them twisting a well-intentioned wish into horrible consequences. Also... I really hate fashion."

The genie didn't know what to say. Nobody had ever bested him before. Steve had a goal all along, he just did a good job of hiding it until it couldn't be stopped. And he was right. Society slowly returned to how it used to be, only this time people were a lot more careful about predicting the future. The religion that started from this quickly faded into obscurity, but it's followers earned a new sense of humility after everything they went through, and the fashion industry never truly recovered, since people were weary of all the shift in trends.

All in all, Steve got the world he wanted. For the rest of time, that period would be regarded as the weirdest year in human history.

*****

THE END