First Impression

[WP] You've been in this time loop for centuries. You know how to break the loop already, you just want to make sure you've done all you wanted and learned everything you need while you're still here, before returning to a "normal" life.

*****

Do you think people exist in this world who are never meant to be together? Like water and oil, two forces that repel, no matter what? Fire and ice, north and south -- do relationships like that exist?

She put my heart in a choke-hold the first time I saw her.

"Here," she said, with my umbrella in her hands. "You dropped this."

Back then, I didn't know what to say. Didn't know the magic spell that would make her fall in love with me.

"Thank you," I replied. We both went our separate ways.

That night in bed, I couldn't stop dreaming she was there with me. That girl with the short black hair, the rosy cheeks, the pale skin. The ears, which poked out a little, and the nose that was perfectly tiny. That endearing mousy face. Even her umbrella had been cute: it had two ears, a nose, a mouth, and whiskers. Meow.

I hugged my pillow as I wished I could try again, wished I could find the girl and have a second chance at conversation. Thank you, really? How boring could one person be?

To my astonishment, my wish was granted. The same date displayed on my phone, the same morning news played on the television, and the same torrential downpour terrorized the streets. I pinched myself, but it was certainly real.

Again, there she was, at the same exact place as before. I made sure to cross her path just as I had yesterday, and I dropped my umbrella. Like an instant replay, she was holding it out to me.

"Here, you dropped this."

Had she somehow gotten more enchanting overnight? My heart threatened to explode just by looking at her.

"Can I get your number?" I blurted out. Idiot.

"Um," she hesitated, "sorry. I don't just give that away."

I stood there, cursing myself, as she walked away.

Would I get another chance tomorrow?

Yes, I would.

"Thanks so much, could I take you out for dinner?" She ran away.

"Come with me, please, the aliens are attacking!" She ran even faster than before.

Maybe she wanted a silence protagonist? Mysterious, edgy? No, that just creeped her out.

Hundreds of phrases uttered over hundreds of soaked mornings. I spent entire days reading through dating manuals and looking up advice online. Nothing seemed to pique her interest. Why was it so hard to talk to a random girl on the street? I know it wasn't the best place for a first meeting, but given unlimited tries I thought I'd eventually be able to crack the code. I handed her my number on a piece of paper, I complimented her clothes, I even tried to pay her to talk to me. None of it was successful.

Then, an idea struck.

I had to be quick, there was hardly any spare time before the arranged meeting spot. It was cheap and flimsy, but it was cute enough.

"Here," she said, holding the umbrella in her hands a moment longer than usual. She turned it over a few times, studying it, before handing it over to me. "You have good taste in umbrellas. The bear's cute."

My soul almost left my body, I could barely stay on my feet. Finally progress, after hundreds of tries. What should come next?

"Thanks. I like yours too." I pointed to the black cat she wielded and she giggled. "My name's Ryan, what's yours?"

The same hesitation I'd seen many times took over her face. "Oh, um, I actually should be going..."

Incorrect, but still progress. I lived to fight another day, with another bear-umbrella at my disposal.

"Yours is cute too. Where'd you get it?"

"I ordered it from this website called Umbrellaigo," she said. "Kind of nerdy, I know, but hey, I couldn't help it!"

I laughed. "Well, you made a good choice. I really like it. My name's Ryan, what's yours?"

"Jane. Nice to meet you."

Finally, after hundreds of failures, I had crossed the bridge. Nothing but limitless opportunity now laid ahead.

I learned all about her. All her favorite shows, books, and foods. All the embarrassing moments she had as a child and all the friends she wished she still had. Jane hated her brother, loved her mother. Her dad had been absent. Her favorite color was purple. She was studying to become a pharmacist. Nothing but her was on my mind now.

Everyday became a new experiment. What could I learn if I said this? How about that? Would she go on a date with me that same night, before the reset? Would she smack me if I tried to kiss her? Would she love me more if I changed my hairstyle? My clothes? My umbrella?

Lifetimes worth of that single day passed by in a blur. At least a hundred years, I figured. Each day as exciting as the last. I loved her, I really did.

The moment of truth finally arrived. I woke up and, on my phone, the date was different. Instead of the 22nd it was the 21st. So, a day before, huh? A warning from life, letting me gather my wits for the real deal.

It was sunny that day, and just in case I went to the same intersection I had thousands of times. She wasn't there.

At night I couldn't sleep. The grand finale was upon me now, and the thought of failure made my stomach turn. I had done it so many times, surely nothing would go wrong.

My alarm clock rang. 7:30, right on schedule. Outside, the rain battered the earth. I went through the motions. I put on the shirt she liked, the hat she loved. I bought the dog-umbrella instead of the bear. I recited the lines over and over in my head, the spell that would enchant her.

I was shaking.

There they were, those dark brown eyes I'd seen a million times. Those cute freckles that gave depth to her face. Those soft lips that I had felt alongside her silky skin.

She held the umbrella out, waiting for me to take it. The same half-interested look as always. Except now, it would be the last time I saw it. No more reruns.

"Here," she said. "You dropped this."

I thought about all the time we had spent together, without her knowing. I thought about all the things I could say to make this moment last forever, the magical spell, the infallible script. I thought about the lifetime of memories, all which happened over a single day. And finally, I thought about the fire and ice, the oil and the water. The hundreds, thousands of encounters it took me to figure her out flashed through my mind, and I knew it wouldn't be fair. Not for her, not for me.

So, with watery eyes and blurry vision, and a whispered good-bye under my breath, I said the only thing I could.

"Thank you."

*****

THE END.