Count Obvious

[WP] A vampire has worked at the local 7-11 for the past 5 decades. No one has the heart to call the vampire out or slay them. A little because they're such a good employee, mostly because they think they're doing such a good job hiding the vampirism when they're really not.

*****

“How are the hotdogs, Reginald?”

“The unknown meat of beasts has been dormant for a week. If it’s freshness you seek, I suggest coming tomorrow morning.” Reginald didn’t glance over from the hotdog machine, carefully rotating the meat to make it appear more edible.

“Right, thanks for the head up. You know, it’s funny. It’s like you have been working here for years. Strange how quickly time flies.”

That comment made Reginald turn around, the pale vampire grinning. He loved it when people made comments like that. To him, it was a reminder of how superior he was. He had gone decades without being noticed and his disguise was still holding firm, or so he thought. Like the rest of the town, I enjoyed throwing him a bone now and then. It was nice to see my words add some excitement to his undead heart.

“How amusing. As I’m sure you’re aware, I only graced this establishment with my presence a few months ago. Perhaps you are mistaking me for another handsome being who only works night shifts.”

“Must be. Guess I’m just a bit of a scatterbrain.” I laughed, though the laugh was cut short when I saw him staring at me. Reginald just stared with an intensity that made me nervous. Was this going to be the day he snapped? He had never shown any aggression before, but maybe the sight of all that stuffed meat had triggered something in him. When his lips parted, I winced.

“No, you’re a valued customer. I appreciate the exchange of words we have.”

That was more shocking than an attack. I had never heard him say something that nice before. I wasn’t sure if he was naturally cold or if that was just something that came with the curse of vampirism, but usually, he would only talk himself up. As I stood there stunned, he went back behind the counter, not paying my shocked expression any mind.

I stood there for longer than I care to admit, only getting snapped out of my trance when my gaze fell on the security camera hanging above me. My slack-jawed reflection on the screen was enough to get me moving again. I shuffled through the store, grabbing the jelly dinosaur snacks I had a craving. Unable to resist the allure of a late-night snack run.

It was strange knowing a living vampire. All my life I had grown up thinking vampires weren’t real, only to encounter one working in a 7/11. Even stranger than that was the fact that everyone was in on this. Collectively, the town had agreed they would look after the vampire, even lying to any vampire hunters that came to town, pivoting them away before they could hunt our beloved Reginald.

Why the town adopted Reginald was a question I still didn’t have a concrete answer to. Some say it was an act of pity after the owner of the store begged the mayor for his safety, while others claim he had been working undetected for a decade without causing trouble, so no one bothered to bring it up. Everyone knew he drank blood, but we also knew he sourced it mainly from animals or, at worst, would visit a blood bank. He never killed, never hunted, he just kept flipping hotdogs. Perhaps we all admired that about him?

Most people would have been corrupted by such power and yet he lives a more normal life than most. It’s like being gifted with the abilities of a god and deciding to spend your time playing Sims rather than actually do anything productive or destructive with it. Maybe that’s why we liked him. In a strange way, he felt human. It was clear he didn’t choose his powers, hell if the stories are to be believed, he was a crying mess when he came to apply for the job. The owner assumed it was nerves, but it was probably out of fear of being detected. I really can’t picture him crying, though. If only he could learn to speak like a human, no one would probably notice the whole vampire thing.

“Why are you staring at those gelatin fossils? Are you ok?” Reginald placed a chilly hand on my forehead, checking my temperature.

“Yeah, sorry. I zoned out for a second there. Jeez, you move quickly. I thought you were behind the counter.”

“You were staring for quite a long time.”

I couldn’t tell if he had moved at a superhuman speed or if I had just zoned out for longer than I expected. I gave a sheepish laugh before heading to the counter, glancing over the stupidly expensive specials hanging on display near the cigarette cabinet. I still wondered how a business could sell two chocolate bars and a drink for $8.00, especially when there was a supermarket across the street. What sort of idiot would pay their over-inflated prices? I tried not to think about how I was that idiot as I slid the jelly dinosaurs over to Reginald.

“$6. Would you like to add a drink for an extra $2?”

“Fine, I’ll get a drink too. Cause I’m a sucker.” I muttered that last part under my breath, grabbing a drink from the fridge before paying him the money.

“It’s a better use of your funds. The beverage is usually $5.”

I just nodded like an idiot. Already accepting the store had caught me in its trap. I would accept my defeat with dignity, rather than spit the dummy over a few extra dollars. It was my fault for snacking so late. He slid my drink and jelly dinosaur’s back, giving me a nod.

“Thanks, I’ve been meaning to ask, what do you do with your spare time?”

“What a bizarre question. Are you trying to form some sort of friendship bond with me that goes above customer and server?”

“I guess?”

“I enjoy that groove machine at the arcade. The one where you dance on the arrowed tiles. I also enjoy horror games.”

“Want to play a round sometime? The arcades open pretty late, so we can go after one of your shifts. Or you could always come over and play a game at my place. There has to be a good two person horror game.”

“I will acquire one for us. I would enjoy that a lot.”

So, we exchanged numbers. Sharing our details before I headed out the door, the little ding of the door’s bell seeing me out. Just before I stepped out of the store, I heard him call back to me.

“One last thing.”

“What’s that?”

“Invite me in when I come over.”

“No problem. I’ll see you around.”

*****

THE END