Numerous people assume that long-distance relationships will always fail. Your family may prevent you from doing so, and some of your closest friends may warn you not to take it too seriously for fear of breaking your heart.
Nobody says it'll be easy; the extra distance makes a lot of things impossible. It's possible that things will get complicated, and you'll feel depressed and lonely at times.
The extra distance, on the other hand, makes the smallest things sweeter: holding each other's hand, dining at the same table, feeling each other's warmth, taking a walk together, smelling each other's hair... these little wishes can instantly mean a lot more in a long distance relationship.
Long-distance relationships can be challenging, but they can also be full of surprises. Here are 21 tips for making your long distance relationship work to keep your love alive and strong:
1. Keep communication to a minimum.
Being too "sticky" and possessive is not a good idea. You don't have to talk for 12 hours a day to keep the relationship going. Many couples believe that doing more would compensate for the gap. This isn't correct. And it's possible that it'll make things worse. You'd get tired of "loving" in no time.
Keep in mind that less is enough. It's not about spamming; you'll just exhaust yourself that way. It's all about teasing and tugging at the right times and in the right places.
2. Look at it as a chance.
Consider it a learning experience for both of you. Consider it a test of your love for one another. “Real gold is not afraid of the test of fire,” as the Chinese proverb goes. Instead of believing that your long-distance relationship is tearing you apart, you should believe that this encounter will strengthen your bond even more.
3. Establish certain ground rules to keep your standards in check.
During this long-distance relationship, both of you must be straightforward about what you expect of each other. Set some ground rules so that neither of you can do anything that will surprise the other.
Are you two, for example, exclusive? Is it okay if the other person goes on dates with you? What is your level of commitment? It's preferable to be honest with one another on all of these issues.
4. Make an effort to connect on a daily basis and in a creative manner.
Every day, greet each other with "good morning" and "good night" greetings. Additionally, strive to keep your partner up to date on your life and events, no matter how boring some of them might sound.
Give each other photographs, audio files, and short videos from time to time to up the ante. You make the other person feel loved and cared for when you put in this kind of effort.
6. Stay away from "dangerous" circumstances.
If you already know that going to the club or drinking late at night with your friends will annoy your partner, you should either 1. not do it or 2. tell him/her ahead of time to reassure him/her.
Don't be reckless about this because you're putting your partner in a situation where he or she feels weak or in control, which will just make him or her more nervous or suspicious, and, of course, really angry.
It might also be convenient for you to fall into the pit that you set for yourself by “hanging out” with your office eye-candy after work, or going out with a girl or guy from your past who has been flirting with you, whether consciously or unconsciously. Before you approach the situation, you must first understand the risks.
Don't just follow your heart's lead. Pay attention to your thoughts as well.
7. Collaborate on projects.
Play an online game with your mates. Simultaneously, watch a documentary on YouTube or Vimeo. On Skype, sing to each other as one of you plays the guitar. Outside, when video-calling each other, "take a stroll together." Go online shopping with each other and buy presents for each other.
It needs a lot of creativity and spontaneity.
8. Repeat the process.
Recommend books, TV shows, movies, songs, current events, and other things to one another. When you read, watch, and listen to the same material, you have more common ground to discuss.
Even if you live apart, this is a good way to build some mutual experiences.
9. Pay one another visits.
Every long-distance relationship revolves around visits.
You eventually get to see each other after all the waiting, yearning, and abstinence to satisfy those little things like kissing, holding hands, and so on, which are all normal to other couples but extra unique and intimate for people in long distance relationships.
Fireworks, glitter bombs, confetti, rainbows, and butterflies will be thrown everywhere.
10. Set a target for yourself.
“At the end of the day, what do we want to accomplish?” “How long do you think we'll be apart?” “How about the future?” says the narrator. These are the questions you and your partner should be asking.
The reality is that no couple can maintain a long-distance relationship indefinitely. We'll just have to calm down at some point.
So make a plan for your mates. Make a timeline with the projected times apart and times together, as well as a final target.
It's important that you and your partner are on the same page and have the same objectives. Such that, even though you don't share the same space or timezone, you're both inspired to move together in the same direction for a future that involves both of you.
Yes, you must be motivated in order for a relationship to last.
11. Take advantage of your alone time as well as your time with friends and family.
You may be alone, but you are not lonely unless you want to be. You don't have to let your partner's life revolve around him or her; you can have yourself, your friends, and your family. Take advantage of this opportunity to spend more time with your friends and family. Make it a habit to go to the gym on a regular basis. Find a new pastime. Binge-watch your favorite series. There are plenty of activities you can do that do not require your partner's participation.
12. Be truthful to one another.
Talk about your fears, insecurities, envy, apathy, and whatever else is on your mind. If you continue to keep a secret from your partner, it will eventually consume you from the inside out. Don't try to do anything on your own. Communicate with each other in an open and frank manner. Allow your partner to assist you and provide you with the assistance you need. It's preferable to address an issue when it's still in its early stages than to wait until it's too late.
13. Be familiar with each other's schedules.
Knowing when the other person is busy and when he or she is available is useful because you can send a text or call at the appropriate time. You don't want to wake up your partner in the middle of a lecture or in the middle of a business meeting. Know about the small and large events in each other's lives, such as college midterms and tests, vital business trips and meetings, work interviews, and so on. This is particularly important if you and your partner live in different time zones.
14. Keep tabs on one another's social media activity.
On Facebook and Instagram, they like each other's pictures. Send each other tweets. Tag one another. Exchange items for each other's walls. Demonstrate your concern. Keep the stalking to a minimum.
15. Give the other person a sentimental item to keep.
A memento has a lot of influence. Whether it's a tiny pendant, a pin, a keychain, a series of songs and videos, or a bottle of perfume, there's something for everyone. We sometimes ascribe meanings to insignificant objects and items in our daily lives, whether consciously or unconsciously. This is what we all do: we strive to store memories in tangible objects in the hopes of being able to look at or hold on to something that will help us recall when our minds fail us. This is why something so basic can mean so much to someone, even though it is of little or no importance to others.
16. Invest in a good messaging application.
This is critical since texting is the most popular and regular mode of communication between you two. On your phones, you'll need a decent messaging app that allows for more than just text and emoticons.
17. Send your gift via snail mail.
Postcards and handwritten love letters are sent to each other. From time to time, they give each other presents around the globe. Birthdays, anniversaries, and Valentine's Day flower delivery Shop together online for cool T-shirts, sexy underwear, and other pieces.
18. Maintain a good attitude.
To keep a long distance relationship going, you must continuously inject positive energy into it. Yes, waiting can be frustrating and lonely at times, but you must remind yourself that the fruits will be as sweet as heaven in the end.
Being grateful all of the time is a great way to remain optimistic. Be grateful that you have someone to love and who loves you in return. Be grateful for the little stuff, such as the handwritten letter that arrived in your mailbox safely the other day. Be grateful for one another's health and well-being.
19. Share information about each other's friends and families.
Since the best topics to talk about are always gossip and controversies.
20. Use video conferencing wherever possible.
Since looking into each other's eyes and hearing each other's voices will make it better.
21. Adopt each other's pets.
And it's adorable. It maintains the romantic atmosphere.
I was surprised to read the first item. Keep communication to a minimum?? I thought the foundation of any relationship specially an LDR is constant communication. Well that's the common misconception. I agree that "constant" communication only leads to miscommunication. It's a relationship, you are not in the big brother house. The important thing is you have an "effective" way of communication rather than constant "sticky" exchanges.
Also, nice read. Have you ever been in an LDR?