I fell in love with a Sociopath (Pt.1)

The Hunter On My Prowl

I was on my regular early morning run, headphones on, music banging. On my heels was a very beautiful lady who from her warm smile, seems to have been tagging along, oblivious to me. She waved at me, and I returned the gesture and continued on my bounce.

She is beautiful alright, but I hadn’t the slightest interest in any intimate stuff, I was in a good place at the point in my life and didn’t need complications, so I was wary of starting whatever I was not interested in finishing, reason I said hi and bye in an instant. 

You might ask why I assumed she had any sort of interest in me other than her just being a nice person. Well, because girls seem to catch feelings at my slightest niceness.  I don’t mean to be conceited, but I am a very handsome young man, well built from head to feet. At least I have received enough complements on my looks to think there might be some truth in these flatteries. An admirer has gone as far as referring to me as Adonis. Wow! There might be something there after all, don’t you think? She definitely thought so, yeah she told me so herself. You get where I am going with this? LOL

 Anyway, I was still on my run and sweating it out, while this damsel was tagging along, she might have thought I was encouraging her to keep up because I was beginning to slow down a bit, but that was just me tiring out, nothing more.

 Now at the end of my last lap, I was done, tired, out of breath and was just about to start walking home, and there she was again, miss mystery damsel. She walked up to me and introduced herself, asked if I was new in the neighborhood (no, I had lived there for more than 17 years) because she was sure she hadn’t seen anything like me around. Said I looked like military (I found out later that she had a thing for men in Uniform). Now she was actively flirting with me and it was weird and very uncomfortable, because she kept smiling and frowning, acting nervous and composed at same time, much like Johnny Depp in Pirates of the Caribbean.

Right away, I smelled trouble, In fact I didn’t just smell it, I felt it because it was standing right there, in front of me. Well, we got into a ‘this and that’ kind of conversation, most of which she started and exploited, because right there on a whim, she already had some kind of plans up her sleeve.

 She asked me all kinds of personal questions, I answered the ones I found comfortable enough to, and just smiled the rest off. I was getting impatient and itchy now, I don’t need this sweat drying up on me, and this conversation isn’t going anywhere...I told myself that, I thought I was sure of that.

 She sensed my reluctance to continue the chitchat but she needed it to continue again somehow, so she asked if I had books she could come borrow. LOL. That’s like one of the oldest tricks in the wooing books, I told her I don’t really read that much, so no. Besides, who said I was going to tell you where I live? Right? Right guys? LOL...

She wasn’t going to give up that easy, because she asked for my number immediately, so she could hit me up later...Ahhh! Quit already! Well, I couldn’t say no, I would have looked like a wuss. What would I have said? "ohm, I don’t give my numbers to strangers". In hindsight, yeah that would have been the best response. With that response, there and then, I would have probably averted the worst calamity of my adult life...

 The undying flaw in the psyche of a man, even in the face of disagreeable situation, with a total stranger not to say the least, I still had to prove that I wasn’t a wuss. Now where the hell did that get me? What a wuss.

Oh my heart, my very fragile, delicate heart...

Anyway, I gave her a number, it was my phone number alright, but you wouldn’t call me and get me on it, you could only reach me on it through whatsapp and that was deliberate...for situations like this.

I couldn’t tell you how happy I was when we finally said our "bye and have a nice day". Dont get me wrong, she was very beautiful, bold and she was obviously a fitness enthusiast. All the kind of things I liked and would have naturally jumped at, but I just had bad vibes about her, something felt wrong and I was sure it wasn't me, and now many years later, I am certain it wasn't me...

I got home, worked out some more, and then hit the shower. In the shower, for a brief moment, I thought about my encounter with miss mysterious damsel, I still felt bad vibes, and I shrugged her off like, damn what a weird human, what a weird start of the day.

My life went on as peacefully as it had, nothing weird and no baloney, LOL. Just like Judge Judy, I don’t like baloney too.

The Home Coming

I was holed up indoors, whiling away, doing things people do indoors when I heard a knock on my door, I opened up and it was it was 'The Masquerade', my 10 year old buddy next door, he said someone wanted to see me, I said who, he said he doesn’t know...well, before I could even think who the hell that might be, there she was, smiling at me...again.

 Oh no, she had tracked me to my house. How the hell did she know where I lived? She was relentless and I was officially worried.

Ladies and gents, that moment was when the relative peace I enjoyed in my quiet single life started making way for drama, chaos and emotional roller-coaster.

 She wanted me, literally wanted me and she was blunt about it. I closed the door behind me and walked to her direction, obviously not wanting her to follow me into my apartment; I’d rather we talked outside. I asked how she knew where I lived; she smiled and said she was just lucky. Well yeah, aside being a stalking weirdo.

 We got talking, there seemed to be something to talk about with her since she was obviously on a mission, so she came prepared.  She said I was beautiful (her word, not mine) and how she couldn’t believe someone like me was in the neighborhood and she was just seeing me for the first time. She was getting into my head and I let her, she was feeding me baloney and it tasted good, I guess high praises and complements would do that to anyone.

In my innocence I thought I was just a good looking bloke, attracting the ladies, but the mistake I made was thinking she was just that - the ladies.

Nope, her actions weren’t just random acts of a thirsty girl, she was cold and calculative. It was ingrained in her psyche, a sociopath doing what psychological predators do. Plan, strategize and execute. How could she be that manipulative, she was just 23 and I was 5 years older, yet she played me like a ping pong. LOL.

The New Dawn, The False Dawn.

Miss mysterious damsel was now in my space, in my life. She knows where I live now and every now and then would pay an impromptu visit. In fact, make that every day; she made sure she saw me every day. If I don’t reply her whatsapp message, she would either run into me "coincidentally" or she comes knocking on my door. (I told you she was relentless).

By this time, I had started letting my guard down, I had started warming up to her, she was very beautiful and her smile, irresistible. She bore a more calm and lovable demeanor in our subsequent run-ins compared to the first day where she almost freaked me out.

She told me she saw stars in my eyes and she would love to f**k me. What? Where the hell did that come from?

Have you ever met a girl that blunt and direct? She really threw me off balance with her directness, and I didn’t know when I started blushing, smiling sheepishly. She had me where she wanted me, my willpower was getting weaker at each encounter with her, she had infiltrated my consciousness, I was fully aware of her now and there was nothing else I could do about it. I could no longer shrug the thought of her off.

 Anyway, I managed to wipe that shameful smile off my face, you know, show some dignity and self respect. I told her she was impolite and presumptuous (I don’t think I really meant those things). Well, she didn’t apologize because she saw nothing wrong in telling me how and what she really felt about me. I thanked her for the complement (sort of) but respectfully turned down her request (that stand really didn’t last long).

 I recently stumbled upon a book titled Psychopath Free by Jackson Mackenzie, and when I skimmed through the first few pages, I felt like the author was narrating my own personal experience, it was surreal. I began to reminisce on my encounter with miss pretty damsel, how it started, how it went and how it ended, and it dawned on me that what I have written here so far was just the first phase of a usually 3 phased plan of the predatory socio/psychopaths on their unsuspecting victims - Idealize, devalue and discard.

Now she was actively involved in my life, being beautiful, being helpful, and being wonderful and before long, she was literally the center of my existence and I longed for her, I was in love with her, I was madly in love with her and it was fast. She was different from any girl I had encountered, she was unique but I didn’t know that that wasn’t always a good thing. I fell in love with her uniqueness, her odd self, her spontaneity, her coldness...I had fallen in love with a cold-hearted sociopath and that was just the beginning...

...To be continued