For How Long

At the end of the last month, I made a few modest goals for the month of November. The month has come to an end and a review of it shows the following results.

1. Cross The 500 Views Milestone ( and If Possible, Get 1000 Views)

Verdict: Inconclusive

When I made this goal at the beginning of the month, it was seeming like a really big one, something I might not achieve. Midway through the month I got a notification that my view was now 428. Having seen that, I started thinking this was a goal already achieved, it was just a matter of two or three articles maximum. What I didn't know was what the next two weeks had in store for me; a sh*tload of demotivation and a lot of activities. Due to this fact, I was not able to meet this goal. There's also the possibility that I already have, but the notification just hasn't come, because that has happened to me before. I was at 428views when I got the "I have crossed a 100 views" notification. I figured it might have been a minor glitch, maybe it's repeating itself.

2. Sponsor Five Newbies Like Myself

Verdict: Not achieved

Due to the massive support that I was getting from this platform in my early days, I promised myself that I was going to do same for other newbies that are newer than myself. I successfully sponsored theree newbies on the platform. I would have met this goal if not for the demotivation that resulted in my long term absence from here .

Anyways, this one was very important to me, and I feel quite sad that I wasn't able to. meet it. I apologize to all the new users who would have been potential beneficiary.

3. Attain 10 Sponsors

Verdict: Achieved

As of the time of making that goal, I had five sponsors, four of which sponsored me on the same day ( that's kind of hard to forget). I was aiming to improve my writing skills enough to catch the attention of at least five other sponsors. Even then I knew it wasn't going to be easy, but as God and my lovely sponsors will have it, I did mange to achieve this goal and surpass it quite well and quite early into the month. In terms of acquisition of sponsorship, I can say it was quite a wonderful month. Thanks to all my lovely sponsors for believing in me, and finding me worthy of your sponsorship, I really appreciate it. Some of these sponsors have been kind to immediately renew their sponsorship as soon as it expired, you have no idea how much that does for my belief in myself and my confidence as a writer here, it really is everything. I love you guys for all the support you do give me.

4. Attain 50-60 Subscribers

Verdict: Not achieved

At the end of the last month, I had twenty four subscribers. My goal was to write articles worthy enough to help me secure the subscription of at least between 25-30 new subscribers this past month, which would have brought my total number of subscribers to 50-60. This goal although ambitious by the standard of some was looking achievable to me by the second week of November when I realised my subscription number had hit 49. But sadly, that's when all my issues started coming up and painfully I could not move past that number. It was quite painful, because I know other things been equal, I would have hit this target, but I guess that's life

5. One Article Per Day

Verdict: Not achieved

Well, this one is another story entirely. In the early days of the month I was keeping up and quite frankly, I believed I was going to do it, but to do that I would have to be active which I was not midway through the month. So I can even say I failed in this aspect.

6. Earnings

I didn't make any earning goals because I was afraid Rusty might not visit me and for more than 90% of the month, that's exactly what happened. Everyday I kept hoping he would come, but he didn't. So my earning is quite negligible in itself, but I'm very grateful to all of you guys who made sure I didn't have $0 for the month, by tipping my comments and post, as well as the sponsorship payments, I'm indeed very grateful.

The big question: What now?

Seeing as Rusty has still not visited me, even though my account is almost two months old, what now? Honestly speaking, I want to give up or give this account up. I have tried to stick it out, hoping things will turn out right soon, but that has not been the case. Can I really continue? I honestly don't feel that way, but I also don't want to piss on the confidence you people have put on me, through subscribing to me, the readership, the comments, the invites, the love and support. You people have shown me you believe in me, and I don't want to be the one to not believe in myself, but I really don't know how much longer I can persevere. Am I giving up? I can say no, but I just know it won't be today, it could be tomorrow, could be next, but it's definitely not today.

Thank you guys so very much for all the kindness you're showing me through the readership, the comments, the upvotes, the subscription and sponsorship. I really appreciate you guys.