" You are not worth it "
" You are useless"
" You're not good at everything "
" You don't deserve to be happy"
" Die! Die! Die!
Those are the lines that recur to my mind when I have anxiety. It feels like that something is missing but I don't know what exactly it is. I admit that anxiety can really kill someone's life, not physically but emotionally and mentally. Overthinking is one of the first reason why a person can have an anxiety. I personally experience this and one thing that I can say is it's not easy to handle.
There are times that I suddenly woke up because of the things that running on my mind. I don't know the reasons why I'm tok worry on those things but sometimes I would suddenly cry for no reason. I feel like I am alone and nobody can understand me. I'm afraid to tell this situation of mine to my family and to my friends because I don't want to be burden to them.
Some says that people with anxiety worry to what happened to their future. But I also believe that they are also afraid that they might not meet their goals. I can say this because I've experienced that. Before ,I'm so eager to control my future and so that I was to occupied to the things that I should not worry. We should much focus on our present because we can't handle the present, how can we able to survive our future?
I'm glad that I able to overcome anxiety. It's not a one day process because it takes time to cope up. But I had some things that help me to lessen or should I say that helps me to overcome my Anxiety. Here's are those things.
1. I write and write
When my mind was too occupied, the first thing that I do is to write. Through writing, I can say all the things that I worry about without any judgement. It feels like the pen and paper is my rant-body. It helps me a lot because it makes me feel relax and refresh after I write. Honestly until now I had my diary and that diary is the witness of all my pain in life.
2. I learn to have faith on God
I admit that before even I believe in God, I actually talked to Him only when I mostly needed him. I'm guilty of it. I only have time for Him when I feel like that there's no other way to my problems. You can judge me for that because I know that I am like that before. But since I experience the most painful trial, I learn that having faith to God is like having weapons in fight. Since then , I always talked to Him and I even read Bible regularly. I can say that I can't considered myself as a perfect person now because no one is perfect but I'm proudly say that I am much better than before.
3. I educate myself about anxiety
Yes, you read it right since my anxiety experience, I encourage myself to read some articles in internet about anxiety and how it can overcome. It is really helpful to me and also to my family because I always shared to them my knowledge in order to them to become aware. I know that sometimes we can't avoid it because a person is vulnerable to overthink but if we know some things about it, we might help ourselves to know the things that we should do just in case we face an anxiety.
4. I surround myself to people with positive mind
Honestly now, I have only few friends that I can call my support system. Even in my social media accounts, I started to unfriend those people whom I think is not good for me. I know that some of you might judge me because of this but I don't see any wrong on unblocking or unfriending person on your socmed. In fact ,it is also a way of self protection. The more we surrounds ourselves to the people with positive minded, the more we become motivated and dedicated in life.
Additional
5. Consult a psychiatrist
Even though ,I don't to this because I got okay before I believe that consulting to a psychiatrist can really helps you to be treated. I know that some of you are afraid to see a psychiatrist because there are people who think that you are crazy because you need to consult to a doctor. But we should not listen to them because you know to yourself that you are fine but you need a doctor to become more better. Psychiatrist was designed to treated and to help those people who experiencing mental issues but it doesn't mean that you are crazy. You're just occupied and hurt. Don't be afraid because if you know that it can help you, why not ? Your mental health is important as your physical state.
Mayiee's Thought
Anxiety is really a traitor to human's life. We don't know where and when exactly it attacked us. I believe that it is normal that we overthink sometimes but we should not let to become this an anxiety. You can do something about it. If you know that a person had experiencing an anxiety, don't discriminate them instead encourage and support them to overcome that. Being their support system can really help them a lot. And if you know to yourself that yourself experiencing anxiety, don't be afraid. Find a way to overcome it. Even we are vulnerable , we should not let our mental health to destroyed our whole senses. I know that in the rightft time ,you can overcome it as well. Just keep on pushing and trying. God is always there besides you , hugging and telling you that to hold on and He will definitely help you.
I want to remind you that;
You are worth it in despite on your mistakes,
You are not useless even you have a flaws,
You are good at everything because God is with you,
You deserve to be happy even you have a problems,
Live ! Live ! live, you deserve to live and feel alive.
