There's a famous sarcastic phrase uttered when a person doesn't want to be involved in the affairs of others: "Am I my brother's keeper?" In case you want to know, the phrase was first mentioned in the Bible by Cain when God was asking about the whereabouts of his brother, Abel. Cain just murdered his brother then.
But are we not our brother's keeper? Even if we want to stay away from people and refrain from meddling with their affairs, somehow our lives are interconnected at some point. We affect each other and our decisions intertwine. We can't afford to not think of others as we go on with our lives.
I'm not suggesting to be involved with the life of everyone around us and be nosy. That's a violation of their privacy and it would not be ethical to do so. But we can make our relationships thrive by following these Biblical principles:
Restore each other
We all fall sometimes, and when that time comes, we long for someone to help us out of trouble. It is irritating and demeaning when we get condemned when we stumble because of our own doing. It's one thing to own up to our mistakes, it's another thing to get pounded on when we're already down. A person's default must be to help, not to condemn a person in need.
And this is where we elevate the relationship. We help. When someone is erring, we can lift them from their fall and make sure they are restored. Caring comes first, correction may come later. Besides, most of the time they already know what they missed out and they are well aware of what to do next time. What they need is someone to tend to their wounds and help them get up.
Carry each others' burdens
Relative to restoring one another is to carry each other's burdens. Relationships thrive when people act as a unit, as a family. But when family members act on their own as if their decisions don't affect the others, the family disintegrates.
One thing that differentiates a healthy relationship is the mutual carrying of each other's burdens. We help one another in their struggles, ease their burdens and make their lives easier. Selfishness must have no room in a healthy relationship. It is a relationship killer.
Carrying each others' burdens sometimes means we sacrifice our privileges for the sake of a person. It means going the extra mile to be sure our neighbors are getting what they deserve. It is very counter-cultural to the thinking, "mind your own business". To love others is to look out for ways on how to serve them, and if possible we carry their load.
Avoid comparisons
Comparison is one of the main triggers why people stay away from others. I love the social media image of a father teaching her daughter that the only time she has to look at what's inside the plate of others is to know whether they are getting enough or not. Most of the time we look at what's inside the plate of others to compare them with what we have. Then based on what we discover, we get jealous or conceited.
Comparisons breed contempt. When we want to get ahead of people, we are faced with the choice to ignore their concerns or worse, step down on them so we can step up.
Why not instead of playing the comparison game, strive to grow with them and be better together?
Life is not perfect, and so are we. But we can make it a little bit better when we choose to love others and inspire others to do the same. Let us not love with words but with actions.
its easier said than done nga... i am evaluating myself with the first two points and its so hard...