Those of us who try to follow the religion but the family does not understand such a religion, all we have to fight against is the long-standing rules and regulations in the society with which Islam has no connection or relationship.
I can talk about my mother for example. Since we came from a traditional religious family, we were once plagued by many misconceptions, many social norms and many social ills. My mother is not out of it. Although I have been trying my best to rid myself of those mistakes since I started walking the path of religion, this push in the family has been very slow. Still, my mother, my father, and many of my family members are still obsessed with many things.
Far from being involved with my mother in worldly affairs, I never saw my father pour a glass of water and eat it before returning to religion. Why would they do such feminine work? - Such an idea has been ingrained in their minds and brains for centuries.
My mother used to look at the matter in the same way. I never saw my father ask me to fetch water from the tap by mistake. I never saw the washed clothes come to dry in the sun. No matter how troublesome and difficult it was for her to do the housework, her mother used to handle everything on her own. But father Baker may be sitting at home, maybe if he wants, he can give his mother a couple of tasks. But never did. My mother never told me to do it.
This is the masculine aristocracy that has been around for centuries! 'Will men do the work of Maiya Mainash?'
And with this aristocracy our women have also created a simple coexistence. When they see a man doing household chores, they wonder, 'Is that his job or is he doing it?'
Since I stay home most of the day, I try to help Ayesha's mother with the housework. Occasionally I dry clothes, arrange water, glasses and dishes before eating, take them to the sink after eating and wash them whenever I can, change Aisha's diapers, dress her, bathe her occasionally, cook when she likes I do.
But, my mother was upset about all this. Mom said: We are two women in the house, your father, why do you have to do these things? Is this your job? '
That the centuries-old idea that they have been holding for generations is sure to stem from their reaction.
One day I sat down with my mother. I explained to my mother why I do these things. I began to explain that these are the Sunnah, following our Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). I said to my mother, 'I have an interest behind each of these deeds, and that is - the path to the Hereafter. In return for all this, I will be rewarded, in sha Allah, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) himself used to assist his wives in worldly affairs. I am following a Sunnah. I am acting. It's nice to have the opportunity to do so. Many brothers do not have the time to cooperate in the family under the pressure of outside work. Thank God for what I get. '
I also said, 'Just because you haven't seen my father do it, you haven't seen my grandfather do it, you haven't seen my brother do it, you haven't seen my brothers-in-law do it — it's only for girls, men are allowed to do it. Instead, men should cooperate with the women of the house as much as possible. This is the Sunnah of our Prophet, and this is for the greater good. '
Mom's mistake was broken that day, Alhamdulillah. But there are many more mothers in our society who have such misconceptions. We need to take initiative on a personal level to correct their mistakes. It is not a matter of guilt that men can do the work of the world, but the feeling of respect and reverence must be awakened anew.
Thank you
